My husband and his ex-wife share custody with their two children. (a 9 year old daughter and a 12 year old son) The children really prefer living in our home which involves a much more stable and routine environment. At what age might they request to live with us on more of a "full time" basis? We are afraid that my husband's ex-wife COULD AND PROBABLY WILL put pressure on the kids and give them a terrible time in regards to this idea. What are your thoughts?? :)

They can "request" it at any age. But the decision will be made by Family Court. If you wish to modify the custody/visitation agreement then you have to petition in Family Court to change it. The court will listen to your arguments, the desires of the children and your ex's arguments, then make a decision on what they feel is best for the children.

When you petition the family court for custody, the children will be appointed a guardian at lidem (spelled something like that)... that's a court appointed person that talks to the children and both parents separately and makes a recommendation to the court based on information they've gathered about what's in the best interest of the child - kind of like a lawyer for the children - each parent has to pay 1/2 the cost of that court appointed guardian.