I live in TN and I have a 7 year old that I share joint custody with the father. I'm a primary caregiver. I'm looking for work in another city because there is no work locally for me. I am graduating college with a business degree and the opportunity for work is about 1.5 hours away from where I am now so that's why I'm looking for work there. Will the court rule in my favor on this issue? Or what's your opinion?

Thanks in advance--:)

I think that since it is only an hour and a half away the best thing you can do is work something agreeable out with the dad and present it to the Judge to approve. Like meeting half way or that you are willing to make sure you get your kid to him for visits.

The father has told the child that he can go with me if I move only if the court approves. Can you think of any reason why they wouldn't approve?

No since I really have no idea of your situation.
I am guessing you want to move to a different jurisdiction from the court you currently go.
I don't see any reason the Judge would say no but I don't know.

The father gets the child EVERY Sun-Tues then every other Friday and Sat night. Then if there is a 2 week school break, the child goes for 1 of the weeks then holidays are split as well. He would be able to get the child every Sun-Tues... it would have to be every other weekend and then school break.?

Ok, This is the issue, on Mon morning, Tue morning who is he going to get the child to school ? Is he suppose to drive 1.5 hours each way to take the child to school and then go back and get the child.

Are you going to go every morning and pick the child up for school, how after school is the child going to get back that 1.5 hours.

If the father is having and using his custody for joint, and it is covering school days, I do not think the judge will allow it, unless you give up a lot more visits, And the father will have to agree, may if you gave him every weekend ( and you transported the child to and from) and he got a lot more in the Summer.

But the father will be losing his time he can have and visit with the child, this is not fair to the father at all. And if the father objects, I doubt unless you have something to offer, the court will side with the father.

You would definitely have to modify the order if he doesn't move close to you.

Well, I don't think every weekend would work for me but yes, he could have him more throughout the school breaks and I'd be willing to meet him half way. The child is going to have to switch schools with the move so No, I wouldn't expect him to drive him to and from school on Mons & Tues. Those are the days he would have to give up in exchange for other days during breaks and other times we can agree.

Hope you'll agree on who is to do the driving on those occasions as well. In my case, I have had to do every single bit of driving for visitation purposes since I moved over 7 years ago. The mother has never once brought the child my direction.

My move involved financial reasons, like yours, and I was not the residential parent although we do have shared parenting agreement through the court.

I was told that the court is not likely going to agree for the child to be moved out of that court's jurisdiction unless both parents agree.

That is only what I was told, and may not apply to other cases.

Think long and hard about the decision, because it will also impact the events that the father can be involved with such as school activities, scouts, extra curricular, sports, etc... because such a distance makes it very difficult.

I don't feel that 75 miles (actually less than 1.5 hrs) is too great of a distance. I've been in my current location my entire life and I know that there is no work for me here. On top of that, I'm engaged to get married this year. The ex is already remarried. Our divorce was a rather "nice" one... we agreed on everything without ever having to set foot in a court room. I would like for a mediator to be able to help with this issue as well.:confused:

If you never had a court work out a custody order for you then I am sure you and him can come up with a new arrangement that the court would probably be okay with as long as your ex is still cooperative.
When you go into court you can ask about a mediator

Hope you can work things out through the mediation. No arguments from me, just trying to voice some considerations that the father may have. If you are able to offer reasons, to the father, for those issues not to be objectionable, I thought it might work better for you.

Oh, I'm sure he's going to be an *&^hole about it but he's a very closeminded individual anyway... doesn't care about "opportunity" or the chance to do better. He thinks I should just settle for whatever job comes along in my present area. Nope, I'm not settling.

Well I am not sure I will say good luck, sorry, as a man I can also understand telling your ex that sorry you won't get to see the kids except a 4 days a month now and on top of that you are going to have to drive 3 hours to pick them up and bring them back.

And since I am taking? How many days a month from you, I will give you a few days during some holidays.

If he has been using all his visits and wants to be part of the kids life, I can't ever thinking he would agree and don't see any court forcing this on him.

So you may want to come to realise that unless you actually offer something good in return you may have to be the one getting those visit days on the holidays when the kids stay there with him.

I am just talking direct, I don't see you really offering him anything, count up the days a week he will lose, add that to how many days ayear, and find a way to give him all of those days back, and you pay for all of the travel. If you can't, I doubt you will find a plan a judge will accept if the father is fighting to keep the kids local.