My boyfriend of 18 months has cheated on me twice. This last time I told him I was done, now he says he knows what he did was a mistake and will never happen again because he can't live without me or my children. He even asked me to marry him, I said yes but then gave the ring back after a week. All of my friends hate him and want me to move on but I do still love him, I just don't know if I am IN love with him anymore, any advice?

Wow, that's a tough call. Do you think he's trying to manipulate you by asking you for marriage? You have more information about you and him than anybody, but you need to look deep before you can make certain that what you're feeling is love, or simply a feeling of comfort. Having only been with him for 18 months, yet he still feels the need to "cheat", ask him and ask yourself: why?

Twice within the first 18 months! I doubt he will have a good track record on being faithful if he can't even do that within the first 18 months. Also who is to say he will quit cheating! He might just hide it better now that you are on to him.
Even in the worst (even abusive) of relationships many girls say I still do love him because they have a history and a bond with them that takes time to heal. Lose the loser!

Wow... He fooled you once, shame on you... He fooled you twice... shame on you... He's not worth it, move on now... the longer you are with a person like that, the more hurt you will get. Time = more emotions = more pain... Look at the Warning signs!!

Hi, you and only you can be the one to decide whether to stick with your boyfriend or not. Answer this question honestly - do you still want to be with him? Now, lets look at the facts:

• Your boyfriend has cheated on you not just once but twice
• You said 'yes' to marying him but then return his ring
• ALL of your friends hate him
• You're not sure if you're in love with him anymore

I don't want to sound harsh but I think you do know whether you're in love with him but you're not being honest with yourself. If your boyfriend couldn't live without you or your children why did he cheat on you the second time you found out? You've only been together 18 months, you have two lovely children and he's still cheated on you, then has the nerve to 'fix' it all with a proposal of marriage!

Think! You're better than that and you deserve so much better. I can tell you're an intelligent woman so don't let him, or yourself, think you're not and that you should live the rest of your life with someone you can't trust. That's a horrible way to live. If he's a good father then he can still be a father to the kids, but he's not a good HUSBAND. You have friends around you who care and can help you find a new man! It will be hard to move on but believe you me, you'll be so much happier, confident and self assured in the long run...

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Originally Posted by afraidtobealone

how do I forgive a cheater?

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Twice? I don't think so hun, you can forgive him but that doesn't mean you have to be with him, forgiving allows you to move on. There are two many crippling factors in why this relationship won't work. I think you know that, this is why you gave him the ring back don't be blinded by his marriage proposal. He wouldn't have did it the second time around.

Relationships are hard enough as it is to maintain, to add extra drama to it, that you really don't need makes it all the more difficult, but one can only do what you allow. What he keeps cheating and keeps apologizing then gives you a ring as if it was going to fix the problem, unfortanelty it doesn't and marriage doesn't fix things either.

In the end you have a decision to make choose wisely, there are honest men out there and you deserve to be happy. You also mentioned you have kids, don't feel that you have to settle either because of that, because you DON'T.

You don't. You dump his crap on the curb.

Twice he cheated? That's enough to get him out of your life and end the cycle for good. Sorry, but you'll be happier without the headgames a cheater brings.