I am getting married to a man who has a 8 year old son. We have been together since he was an infant since the mother divorced him right after the baby was born. For years we have wanted custody and she always says yes and then changes her mind. We had pretty much given up until recently. She has a new boyfriend of 5 months and is not 3 months pregnant and has told us she can not handle their son anymore and wants us to take him (thank God). I am very concerned that this is done leagally because she is on welfare in mass and we live in New Hampshire now. I am afraid that she will use us as a babysitter for the summer and then say she changed her mind after her baby is born without doing it leagally. The problem is where to start. They were divorced in Mass and she still lives there. We now live in NH and want to start the process and have no idea how to proceed. Do we go to the courts where we live or where she lives. Since they seem to agree on this (for now), can we just file with the court and have a judge make it legal? We don't want child support from her as we are much more financially secure than she is but I heard that is not up to us-that the judge might still order her to pay us-we are afraid she might change her mind when she hears this. We just need help on how to start this process
Thanks
Paula and Peter (soon to be married in Hawaii) ::)
