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-   -   Adoption or this? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=193918)

  • Mar 12, 2008, 02:32 PM
    dead_city
    Adoption or this?
    My friend Tikani wants a baby really bad. She is only 16!!
    I try to support her but I don't know how.
    She said she wants one now or she will never have one.
    Tikani is thinking of going to a sperm doner and pretending that it was like a one nights stand.
    OR adopting with the help of her big sister.
    I know she is crazy but whitch one would you choose.
    Don't say neither (:
  • Mar 12, 2008, 02:37 PM
    J_9
    Neither.

    Sorry to say, she is too young to have a child at this time in her life. Can she afford it? Probably not, she's only 16, so adoption is out of the question, no agency in their right mind will allow her to adopt, and there is no way that she can adopt "with the help of her big sister." That's just not possible.
  • Mar 12, 2008, 03:18 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    She is too young for any of it, she can not legally adopt, and she can get get sperm from the sperm bank, she may just start having sex with someone but obvoiusly since she things if she does not have one now, she never will, she is not thinking properly. She obvously has some seroius emotional or mental issue and needs much more help than we can give, if she is that obsessed.
  • Mar 22, 2008, 10:10 AM
    FeelSoNumbZombie
    A baby changes your life. It requires time, patience, love, nurturing, and most of all, MONEY! Lots of it to insure that your friend would be able to provide even the necessities such as diapers and formula- alone.
    It might be wise to have her go online and speak with single mothers. Most single young mothers- struggle.
    They have inner battles with themselves. Mainly due to not having the maturities to handle such an endeavor.
    Like waking up in the middle of the night to a child that is screaming her head off and you are unable to to determine why. This is a frieghtening experience. Especially if the mother has to work in the am just to buy diapers and keep a roof over their heads.
    Or doesn't have any help. Isn't able to date. Isn't able to go out with her friends or do the things that young people value. Or isn't able to go and buy milk or diapers without having to carry her child to the market in the middle of a snow storm.
    Because she cannot afford a car.
    Babies cost a lot. More than money! If you aren't really ready for the commitment's that a child needs to survive.
  • Mar 22, 2008, 11:31 AM
    N0help4u
    I know so many kids having kids and then the novelty wears off and they can't be bothered any more and leave it up to grandma to raise. She says if she doesn't have one now she never will. At 16 kids say lots of things that they do not mean because as they grow older and see things from a grown up perspective they do not hold on to their irrational reasoning they had as a teen.
    As the others have said she is too young to adopt or go to a sperm donor so the choice IS neither.
    Where would she even get the money for the adoption agency or the sperm bank?

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