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Hey,
The last time I wrote,I had only cut twice and I said I had stopped.well now I can't stop!
Two has turned into 14 and I don't know how to tell my parents,someone please help me figure out how to tell them,this is so hard!I want to tell them before I end up going to deep or even committing suicide.someone please help!
Hello, stupidly addictive isn't it?
Right I used to self harm and I managed to stop here are a few tips:
You have to want to stop, you can achieve this by a) reaching your lowest point (not recommended) or b) setting yourself a reason/goal for stopping, a holiday/job/person
Break the cycle!
Do not let yourself feel guilty or ashamed about yourself harm. Learn to love your scars- they are part of who you are now.
Remove the emotion from self harm. Easier said than done this one.
Find your triggers- and avoid them
You probably know what they are by now, but if you don't think back to the comon factor before you self harm.
Consider counselling
They can give you ways to avoid trigger such as anger and frustration, or explore the underlying reason for you starting to self harm.
Replacement
Here are a few suggestions to replace self harm
If you like the blood- draw on yourself with red marker/ make up fake blood and paint yourself with it
If you like the pain
Icecubes rubbed on the area you target/ helped tightly in your hand (fav of mine)
Flick an elastic band on your wrist/ pinch your ears
Other replacements are
Stress balls- destroy them!
Punching pillows
Screaming
Singing along to loud, fast music (be careful some music can trigger)
If you still want to self harm
Make yourself a deal- no longer than x minutes, no deeper than x etc
Be controlled stop a little before you feel you want to
It's more of a weaning method
Some of these methods might not work for you, everyone is different, I included a couple which don't work for me but I have been told work for others.
You know, if you are scared to tell your parents, you might want to go to a school counselor, or nurse, and tell them that you want to tell your parents, and that you want their help to do so. These professionals can help your parents understand what "cutting" is and why adolecents your age do it. They can also help your parents get you the help you need, or help your parents to be able to help you. Its hard to tell your parents things at your age, but the fact you want to tell them is a huge step, but you are not alone. There are people who can help you.
In my family, when we are afraid or too emotional, or need to say something that makes us uncomfortable, we write it. My daughter and I have written many letters to get through issues. Some things are just too hard to say face to face. Over the years, if I am mad at my husband about something, I always write to him about it. I feel I can spill my emotions out without embarrassment or being interrupted and lose my flow. I also am able to choose my words more carefully. These days, we even use e-mail for it. Try this, because I'm sure they love you and would want to help you anyway they can. Maybe you could even write another letter listing the things that are giving you this pain. You don't even have to give that one to anyone if your are not ready. Just tear it up when you finish. Pulling these hurts out of your soul and writing them on paper, then destroying it could be therapeutic. My daughter cut herself at one time. She is happy now, but the scars are still on her arm, and it makes me a little sad when I see them. Don't give yourself permanent scars for temporary problems.
I'm 13 years old and I used to cut about 2 months ago.My parents found out the hard way. My school called them and told them everything! So when my parents told me what they new I decided to sit them down and tell them y. u should sit your parents down and tell them y u did it and your sorry if u dissapointed them and that u need help quitting. It worked for me! (= good luck!Quote:
Originally Posted by michelley93
You are a very wise 13 year old. You handled that just right. I'm happy you are better and that it worked for you! :)Quote:
Originally Posted by his-for-life2008
I am a mother of a child who is cutting. I want you to know please tell your parents so that they can help you. My son didn't come to me and well I found out the hard way and now we can find out the issues but he doesn't want the help and you do. So please tell your parents or see an adult that you trust at your school. The school can get you help without your parents knowing if you want.
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