I've 2 boys myeldest has just turned 2 and my youngest is 4 and ahalf months,I never gave me eldest chocolate or milk,crisp or sweets before he was 1,I don't like giving myson that rubbish I won't give him any kind of fizzy drinks and I don't plan on giving my youngest it either but when my mum comes round and its breakfast time she gives mybaby afew spoonfuls of cows milk and coco pops from myeldest sons bowl [thier not serposed to have milk so young] she's given him chocolate and she gave him meat pie and gravey,I've told her not to give any of it to him because if the chocolates made on the same line as nuts he might be allergic to nuts the hospital it at least an hours drive longer if theirs traffic,everyone no's that baby's arnt serposed to have cows milk till their about 1,and what if id not cooked the meat pie properly and gravey has too much salt in it for kids,she gives myeldest coke and then he runs round like an idiot and ends up getting hurt falling over bangin his head, I told her not to give it to him because that's what it does to him and she says well I won't be hear,she won't listen to me at all,I ask her to mind them while I go and do an errond and she says their your kids you look after them,I've been trying to disaplin myeldest the last year and when I'm telling him off she says leave him alone,I've tried telling her I've had ago at her but its not getting through to her at all

Any 1 got any ideas??

Do you live in her house?

No

She's never really listend to me even when I've needed her help or advice she just says its your life,never paid me much attention she only comes round to see the kids and then when she does she feeds them rubbish or things their not serposed to have

Sound like she is an over bearing mother. My mother is something like that to. I love my mother sometime she believe her way of raising children her is best regardless of what my wife and I say. There are several ways you could handle this:

1) You have to talk to her about it calmly and not when you are upset. If you don't want you children eating certain things explain to her. Say listen mom I try not to give them soda please don't give soda there is juice in there instead. If jr begs for soda the answer is no.

But understand has a grandmother she has to spoil the grand kids. If I let my mother have it her way there would not be a cookie left in the house. I pay my mother to babysit and straight up a little the majority of the time on there on the computer. When I hear the glass jar open I scream out don't give him any more cookies just out of reflex. Eventually, I think she will come around or just get tired of you running in the kitchen after her. Now, when my son was a cookie... she is says "go ask you father." If it something that he normally doesn't have she will ask can he eat this. Come to think about it everyone in my family does that. Because we don't eat red meat or pork. But you have to stick to your guns and pick the battles. Chocolate milk is not too bad but soda definitely not. If you tried to give my 8 year old soda he looks at you like is this soda... this is not mines, can I drink this?

2) Become you mothers shadow and when she gets upset that you are following her.. you tell her listen I don't trust you... the minute you see that I'm gone you will give try to feed the kids something I don't want them to have. Eventually, she will cave.

3) Hide the stuff you don't want them to have. I have a locked pantree... sodas and sweets are in there. Unless, your mom smuggles food in the house you should be straight.

Maybe showing her the statistics about giving a 4 month old cows milk etc will make her understand. Children under the age of 1 shouldn't even have honey, it can cause botulism. Maybe she's unaware as to the dangers of giving a young child these things, times were different when she raised you, we know more now and parents are more aware of the consequences when giving kids junk food. If this doesn't work then maybe she shouldn't be left alone with them.

I agree Altenweg. But it depends on the mother. My mother believes the cure for hick-ups is soaking a small piece of brown paper bag in spit and then placing that paper on the baby's head.

Thanks ill try it all lol something got to work I'm sick of it now, its like when I brought my youngest home from the hospital we went to mygrandparents for afamily gatherin pass the baby round and all that stuff, and he started crying so I was holding him rockin him trying to get him to stop I didn't want him to have adummy[pasifier] because il have to wean him off it like I'm doing with myeldest and she took mybaby off me got adummy out mybag and stuck it in his mouth yeah he stopped crying but it wasn't the point,I had to walk away before I yelled at her she just doesn't listen weather or not she thinks I'm agood mum I don't no but I do mybest I go without to buy mysons things they need clothes,educational toys,TV is banned in myhouse their only allowed to watch dvds that I've picked,no plastic swords or guns or anything that I think is violent I'm trying to do my best as a one parent family[ive got boyfriend but he lives with his parents] but she keeps going against mywishes and ignorin me it really gets to me.thanks for your input

I think you are being a little over protective. Understand that your mother will see anything you do as being over protective. Banning TV is not really go because they cousins, friends and peers will watch TV and they will be isolated.

I remember back in the 6 grade my family went to see Lethal Weapon 2 over the weekend. When I got back to school there was the quiet kid, barely spoke and I sat next to have when we have free time we could speak and I couldn't wait to tell him about it and asked wheter not he seen it and he stop me and said that's a rated "R" movie. I can't watch rated "R" movies. I just ignored and begin telling him about the movie he was totally not interested.

I think you and your mother are extremes. There is a healthy and safe middle ground your job is to find it.