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-   -   Why can't I be bothered? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=186939)

  • Feb 22, 2008, 08:55 AM
    BlOnDeLoNeR
    Why can't I be bothered?
    I'm 20, been in all girls schools all my life, never known lads until I got a part time job. I found I was the flirty type with a lot, apart from one who I liked, but I thought I was out his league (he is mega fit, well to me) I discovered he liked me and we got chatting, it took a lot of persuasion to go on a date, but during the date all I could think is why if I like this guy do I not want to be with him.

    Basically to put it simply, I cannot be bothered being in a relationship, in the past I've really enjoyed getting attention of lads, and texting, but this guy its different I don't want to mess him around as I doubt it will go anywhere, but why if I like him do I no want him. I really dread the thought of being at uni all day and then coming home and not being by myself or with my family. I like to put my pjs on and curl up in front of the TV, or phone a friend, or just have NO commitments at all.

    I'm confused as to why I feel like this, this guy is being nice to me, but often I dread getting a message as I know that's it for the night, he will chat away, but its not usually about anything that interests me to be honest, its more bigging me up, telling me how great I am, how pretty I am etc.

    Sometimes I feel I don't know how to handle lads, with not growing up with them, all my friends from mixed schools have been in relationships since they were 12. I do think it has a big impact, or maybe I'm just strange in the way that I prefer my own space, own time, with no commitment.

    Please help...
  • Feb 22, 2008, 05:33 PM
    talaniman
    Just be yourself and do what you want. Stay true to who you are as this is your life to journey through, and don't bend to peer pressure. Do what makes you happy.
  • Feb 23, 2008, 01:51 AM
    kraz
    It might be best to let him know that at this time in your life you are not ready for a relationship but would be happy to be his friend (if that is what you want)

    I think what you are feeling is quite normal, you don't need to rush into a relationship if you are not ready! Don't let what others are doing or friends pressure you into doing anything you don't feel comfortable with, and being at uni will widen your circle of friends and experiences.

    Get that education and spend time as you please, because later when you are ready to settle you might not have as much time as you would like to have for that me time.
  • Feb 23, 2008, 04:36 AM
    imation
    I you want to be by yourself, then do it. Just be yourself and reach your goals. You should never let being single define you. It should inrich your life, not dictate it.

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