Hi, I had a relationship with a very close friend whom I knew for six years. We were together for a little over one year when he left me. Actually I was facing a lot of problems at my home front as my elder sister was suffering from cancer and I needed someone to provide me with total support at that time. The guy then decided to walk out and went ahead to marry someone else. I was simply shocked and deeply hurt. Its been a year now that everything has ended and in the meantime my sister died too. But the guy, perhaps due to deep guilt that he has, wants to be in touch as friend despite my resistance. He still says he cares and everything just happened in a flash. But I have decided not to pay any attention to his lies. I know I am right, but still can't understand why I he still interested in my life? Why does he wants to see me and wants to talk to me..

Maybe married life doesn't agree with him. But the fact is, he is married and again pursuing you, probably feels you would be available on the side. I would see red flags here and not bother with him. Sounds like a recipe for disaster (your disaster).

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Originally Posted by southern delight

hi, i had a relationship with a very close friend whom i knew for six years. we were together for a little over one year when he left me. actually i was facing a lot of problems at my home front as my elder sister was suffering from cancer and i needed someone to provide me with total support at that time. the guy then decided to walk out and went ahead to marry someone else. I was simply shocked and deeply hurt. its been a year now that everything has ended and in the meantime my sister died too. but the guy, perhaps due to deep guilt that he has, wants to be in touch as friend despite my resistance. he still says he cares and everything just happened in a flash. But i have decided not to pay any attention to his lies. i know i am right, but still can't understand why i he still interested in my life? why does he wants to see me and wants to talk to me.. ?

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It is probably a combination of regret and guilt. He, with time, has realised he perhaps made a mistake, but probably wants to contact you to ease his guilt about the way he acted. I mean, come on, who breaks up with someone when they are going through something like that!? You are better off without him, the way he has acted he doesn't deserve you.

He and his wife probably had a fight and he now wants another female to get close to. Given your past and the fact he is married now, the less contact you have with him the better.

Maybe married life doesn't agree with him. But the fact is, he is married and again pursuing you, probably feels you would be available on the side. I would see red flags here and not bother with him. Sounds like a recipe for disaster (your disaster).

He and his wife probably had a fight and he now wants another female to get close to. Given your past and the fact he is married now, the less contact you have with him the better.

Yes, he is probably wanting to have you on the side. Set a dinner date with him for about 1 1/2 to 2 weeks in advance. Ask him what time he gets off work so you can set the time. Then call every day when you know he is not at home and speak with his wife and ask her if she will give him the message that you will not be able to make it to dinner and is she his maid, or housekeeper. Then she will probably inform you of being his wife, and she will know what she is dealing with.