Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Adult Sexuality (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=370)
-   -   If you have oral sex are you a virgin (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=184744)

  • Feb 16, 2008, 03:46 PM
    confused25
    Quick question. I have seen a lot of these threads where people are confused about what constitutes virginity. I was just wondering what most of you thought about oral sex. If you have had oral sex but not intercourse, are you still considered a virgin?
  • Feb 16, 2008, 03:48 PM
    J_9
    I have moved your question to a thread of it's own. It's not a good idea to piggyback your question on someone else's thread as it causes confusion and your question may go unanswered.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 03:49 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Yes, as for as I know most people view this as a virgin.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 03:50 PM
    confused25
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by J_9
    I have moved your question to a thread of it's own. It's not a good idea to piggyback your question on someone else's thread as it causes confusion and your question may go unanswered.

    Sorry, I apologize for that. I was actually worried that people would get angry because I was posting another similar topic. Thanks for clarifying things.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 05:43 PM
    Choux
    Just keep it simple, intact hymen, you're a virgin. :)

    You may be the oral sex queen of your town, but keep it simple... hymen intact, you're a virgin! ;)
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:24 PM
    confused25
    What about from a guys perspective? If he has only had oral sex but not intercourse, is he still a virgin?
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:29 PM
    ISneezeFunny
    Yeah... to me, virginity depends upon actual sexual intercourse (penetration... whether it be vaginal or anal)
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:36 PM
    Choux
    Honey,

    Don't be so concerned with what men say... you want to be a virgin, say you're a virgin. It is none of anyone's business but your own. You had sex last year and don't have a hymen, hey, you lost your hymen when you were horsebackriding when you were twelve.

    Don't be subservient to men. Think for yourself about you sexuality. :)
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:38 PM
    Choux
    Folks, See how silly and outdated the term virgin is?? A girl can be the biggest whore in town and never been penetrated by a penis.

    I'm not referring to anyone here or anywhere.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:51 PM
    confused25
    Choux: This may surprise you but I'm actually a guy. I was just curious about what constitutes a virgin. See I'm a 22 year old male and I have only engaged in oral sex. So I was just curious what peoples thoughts were on whether such actions would classify you as a virgin or not. I have mixed feelings because I see oral sex as a very intimate act, but if a girl ever asked me if I were still a virgin I wouldn't really know whether to say yes or no. I just don't want to be a liar.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 07:58 PM
    Choux
    Confused,

    It is no one's business. Tell anyone who asks yes, you are a virgin... or no, you're not. Whatever you wish. This has nothing to do with being a liar! It is no one's business.

    My opinion, it is time for you to have intercourse. :)
  • Feb 16, 2008, 09:35 PM
    confused25
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Choux
    My opinion, it is time for you to have intercourse. :)

    Ha! Well I want my first time to be with a very special woman, that's how it was for oral sex and I want the same for intercourse. It's funny though, I do worry that I might be missing out on a lot of life experiences by waiting. I'm curious, what is everyone's opinion on this? I'm not asking anyone to make a decision for me, I just want to hear opinions.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 11:19 PM
    Alty
    Here is the dictionary definition of virgin,

    vir·gin (vûrjn)
    n.
    1. A person who has not experienced sexual intercourse.
    2. A chaste or unmarried woman; a maiden.
    3. An unmarried woman who has taken religious vows of chastity.
    4. Virgin The Virgin Mary.
    5. Zoology A female insect or other arthropod that produces fertile eggs without copulating.
    adj.
    1. Of, relating to, or being a virgin; chaste.
    2. Being in a pure or natural state; unsullied: virgin snow.
    3. Unused, uncultivated, or unexplored: virgin territory.
    4. Existing in native or raw form; not processed or refined.
    5. Happening for the first time; initial.
    6. Obtained directly from the first pressing: virgin olive oil.
    7. Zoology Producing fertile eggs without copulating.

    I'll let you decide based on this definition. Personally I think that as long as a female's hymen is not peirced by a penis (am I allowed to say that?) then she is a virgin, and unless a man vaginally enters a woman with his penis he is a virgin. Okay, this sound outdated to me, maybe we need to come up with a new definition.
  • Feb 16, 2008, 11:27 PM
    Allheart
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by confused25
    Ha! Well I want my first time to be with a very special woman, that's how it was for oral sex and I want the same for intercourse. It's funny though, I do worry that I might be missing out on a lot of life experiences by waiting. I'm curious, what is everyones opinion on this? I'm not asking anyone to make a decision for me, I just want to hear opinions.


    You sound like a very sweet and good young man. Ah, I honestly don't think you need other people's opinions my friend, frankly they could use yours ;) .

    You keep following your heart and your very good thoughts, and I have a feeling, you will make that very special young lady, a very happy one.

    You are not missing out on life's experiences... every day brings a new experience.

    You sound like a fine young man - stick to your principles.
  • Feb 17, 2008, 07:17 AM
    Gregisteredtrademark
    For what it's worth by definition, you are a virgin. Webster's defines a Virgin as "a person who has not had sexual intercourse". Since you have not had intercourse you are a virgin. I would simply tell a mate that you have fooled around, but never had real sex or intercourse.
  • Feb 17, 2008, 03:16 PM
    confused25
    Thanks a lot Allheart, your kind words definitely mean a lot. I hope that someday I will find that special person and when I do I hope she will be comfortable with my "lack of experience." :)
  • Feb 17, 2008, 03:55 PM
    MOWERMAN2468
    Well, now that we know the true definition of virgin. At least we know HE doesn't have to worry about a hymen being broken, ha ha. At first I thought it was a young lady, then found out it was a young man.
  • Feb 17, 2008, 05:43 PM
    confused25
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by MOWERMAN2468
    well, now that we know the true definition of virgin. at least we know HE doesn't have to worry about a hymen being broken, ha ha. at first I thought it was a young lady, then found out it was a young man.

    LOL! I wonder why some people assumed that because I was asking a question about virginity that I would automatically be a woman. Is it because society has drilled into our heads the idea only women should be concerned about being a virgin? Interesting...
  • Feb 17, 2008, 05:48 PM
    Allheart
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by confused25
    Thanks a lot Allheart, your kind words definitely mean a lot. I hope that someday I will find that special person and when I do I hope she will be comfortable with my "lack of experience." :)


    I meant every word. And you will be that special someone and when that day does come, the two of you will be so lost in each other, that you just touching her hair will feel wonderful to her.

    Remember, every man and every woman is different. So whether you had 50 past experiences or 0, every man always has that first time, with someone new and has to get to know what he or she likes anyway... so don't fret about no past history.

    It's a natural act, that comes naturally. Especially the first time... and even more so when there are deep feelings for the person.

    Your doing A okay :)
  • Feb 17, 2008, 06:26 PM
    purplewings
    My Websters defines Virgin as someone who has not had sexual intercourse. With that definition you would be considered a virgin, as would your female counterpart. However, a man marrying a woman who tells him she's a virgin, and then months later discovers she's had oral sex with several people may feel completely duped. Perhaps, as Choux suggests, a person can be much less than pure and still be considered a virgin - by the dictionary, at least.

    Perhaps your answer would be "according to Websters, yes I am".

    Perhaps the question should change to reflect our changing times.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:49 AM.