I recently found out that the man I've been sleeping with for 3 yrs was with another women while he was with me. I sent him an email saying that even though I still cared very much for him and wanted to see him that I couldn't keep doing the things we have done knowing he has been with someone else. I also told him that I had hoped that whoever she was that it was all worth losing a good frienship over with a person that did nothing but treat you well. Some people have told me that he will call sometime down the line and other people say he won't. I don't even know if the message I sent to him is actually to be considered a breakup. Please help with any input you have.

I don't know why you even care if he contacts you.
cheaters = bad!
give up and find someone who deserves you and won't cheat on you!

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Originally Posted by confused63

I recently found out that the man I've been sleeping with for 3 yrs was with another women while he was with me. I sent him an email saying that even though I still cared very much for him and wanted to see him that I couldn't keep doing the things we have done knowing he has been with someone else. I also told him that I had hoped that whoever she was that it was all worth losing a good frienship over with a person that did nothing but treat you well. Some people have told me that he will call sometime down the line and other people say he won't. I don't even know if the message I sent to him is actually to be considered a breakup. Please help with any input you have.

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There can be break-ups in friendships too. You're just letting him know how you feel about this whole thing. You shouldn't wait around for him to call you. You're taking steps in the right direction by ending it. Now you can find yourself a good man who's ready for a real relationship (assuming that you want more than sex). Maybe he'll change his mind, maybe he won't. Who cares? He's a bad example of the male species and imation is right, he doesn't deserve you.

I hope you will get over him, and find some one who deserves, the good person that you are. He has proven he is not. Will he change? Don't know. Should you wait? No. Get on with life without him.

Will he call? This is the dating helps forum, not the psychics, so the answer to your actual question is... WHO CARES?

That you feel for him is noble, I guess. People love, so that's no big accomplishment. That you stop sexual relations with him when you discover he's doing others, too, well that's just common sense, right? Based on a lot of other posts we get here, we WILL give you gold stars for using common sense, it's less common than it should be.

But lastly, LOVE YOURSELF, too. If there's any ambiguity in the message you sent being a breakup, please make it official. Guys are what they do. Are you two over 30? If so, then he's REALLY who he is based on actions. Words are sweet, but actions are reality.

Since you "love" so forgivingly, I'll warn you that friendship with this guy will also lead to further heartache/disappointment. You can do it, just accept NOW that you're planning to be sad over it later. If that's OK with you NOW, then don't over-whine about it later when it happens.

I think you have a good sense of what to do and are only half doing it. Don't let your heart control your life, use your mind. If you don't, your spirit will pay the consequences.

This man that was playing me all this time , by me calling that one night in particular guess what happened he got played. Oh well his loss. Playing games with people isn't good it always comes back to haunt you

Karma is a wonderful thing. You know what you need to do , I think it was HC who said in a thread not that long ago. Do a NIKE... "Just do it"