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-   -   I love her but don't want her (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=178363)

  • Jan 30, 2008, 01:13 AM
    novak
    i love her but don't want her
    All threads merged for the whole history of this relationship.


    Ever since I've first gone out with some one I've had issues.
    the first one is I can't go back out with an x girlfrend, and the other I can't stay in a relationship.
    please don't get me rong I've been with girls I love and would anything for them but I just decide I don't want to be with them.
    I'm in a relationship now and I've never felt this way before about anyone before and I seriously even now I still feel like I don't want to be with her any answers please help
  • Jan 30, 2008, 01:27 AM
    Kia
    You haven't been in true love yet I say; maybe close but no cigar.. lol
  • Jan 30, 2008, 01:41 AM
    terellowens
    Kind of like me I guess you like the thrill of the chase and once you have caught them you lose interest
  • Jan 30, 2008, 03:25 AM
    novak
    Trust is the main thing
    Hey, I'm a strait up guy easy going and wuld do anything for and e girl within reason. I'm not a jealous type but lately I have been getting jealous. My girlfriend is currently at a party with booze boys and girls. She's kissed a girl already tonight and that doesn't bother me because she told me and teenage irls do that stuff. But what if she's drunk and gets with a guy she's got two options
    a)she tells me if she does
    b)il find out because someone will tell me
    I trust her but I don't trust the other guys because I know what we are liike (sorry guys) should I talk to her about this in the morning so I don't ruin her night or just leave it
  • Jan 30, 2008, 03:34 AM
    simoneaugie
    Tell her now. Or tell her later. Break up with her. She wants to party and get drunk. Your relationship with her is in her way.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 04:16 AM
    novak
    Parties and Drinking
    Where I live the legal age you have to be to drink is 18. Now before I write this take into note I've been to parties got drunk and was the person people wanted to go. But now I hate the whole underage drinking thing and parties. Do parties have a reason other than watching people fight get drunk and laid?
    I've been to parties with teenagers under the legal age to drink and they don't know how to party. You probably think I'm a tool but I've seen older people late 20s early 30s have better parties why don't the young ones just wait, please tell me your opinion id love to hear it.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 06:26 AM
    RickJ
    You're smart. Stop hanging out with the idiots who behave poorly and hang out with the smart ones who are wisely trying to become good citizens.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 06:38 AM
    HistorianChick
    Maturity is a big part of "fun parties." In most cases maturity comes with age.

    Seems like you're getting a taste of that maturity... listen to it. Stop going to the parties that are just to "get drunk and laid."
  • Jan 30, 2008, 07:19 AM
    JBeaucaire
    Daiting is fun. It's adversarial. Hunt and chase and bob and weave.

    If only some young lady would make you hunt her for more than a week or a month, you might actually find the love you seek. Girls give in and give "it" up to their guy far too quickly.

    Guys are laser beams and if they hit their target too fast, it's off to find another target. Keep hunting. But try hunting in different places. If you're hunting in bars, perhaps those girls are looking to get caught more quickly. Try hunting in a place where women are typically longer in the chase, like a community event, charity outreach, church age-appropriate group, karate class, etc. You get the idea. Mix up the hunting ground.

    I met my wife in a college cafeteria. Every line I'd ever (successfully) used fell flat with her. It took me months to get her to even agree to go out with me. She didn't like me, thought I was weird (I was, but I wasn't, you know?) Long story short, 25th anniversary next year. Our differences work with our comminalities to make it work long-term.

    Viva la difference.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 07:38 AM
    talaniman
    Keep living, you'll experience it, sooner or later.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 07:38 AM
    ziggychubby
    It's just that you're really not in love..
  • Jan 30, 2008, 08:35 AM
    Bluerose
    All you can do is let her know how you feel and that you are concerned about her partying. What she does with the information, I'm afraid, is up to her.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 08:43 AM
    HistorianChick
    No, not all teenage girls do that. If you don't want a girl like that as your girlfriend, find one that doesn't party, kiss girls, and leave you home alone wondering if she's going to end up in bed with another guy!

    Darlin, you have standards... keep them. :)
  • Jan 30, 2008, 08:45 AM
    talaniman
    If your that worried, maybe your with the wrong person. If you have to hold her hand, and keep her safe, from all the big bad wolves, then you should leave little red riding hood alone. Walking in the woods, is what she does.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 02:42 PM
    thegirlishurting
    Do you really trust her? If you do, then there's nothing to worry.

    Stop worrying your life away. If she decides to sleep with another guy, then she's not the girl for you and accept that. You can't dictate her on doing what to do, you can only advise her what you feel is best. If she choose a path you don't agree of, be glad you know this instantly so you can do the next best step...
  • Jan 30, 2008, 03:00 PM
    peggyhill
    If she is a teenager she shouldn't be drinking anyway. She could go to jail if she gets caught. (at least if you're in the U.S. where the drinking age is 21) And not all girls kiss girls at parties. I've been to plenty and haven't done that.

    If you feel like you can't trust her, then break it off. Otherwise, you will keep being suspicious whenever something like this happens. I think you should have an honest talk with her about how you feel. Explain to her that you are concerned that some guy might take advantage of her if she is too drunk. If she continues to go to parties without you, then you will have to decide if the possibility is something you can live with.

    Waiting to talk to her in the morning is a good idea. Those kinds of conversations are best had when both people are sober. If you try to talk to her when she's drunk, she is just going to get upset, and may not even remember it in the morning.
  • Jan 30, 2008, 03:44 PM
    TrueFaith
    This is what makes me laugh I trust her but not other guys..

    Dude! Hello. Who is the guy kissing? Who is allowing it? If it was rape then yeah OK. But 10/10 times it takes two people. She will do it because she wants to. Not because the guy talks her into having sex over a friendly game of chess and a glass of water.

    I trust her. But not the guys. Man no you don't or you wouldn't be talking like this. You would have nothing to fear. You don't trust her and for good reason. Don't blame it on the boys

    Man I know the type. Party a lot get drunk and kiss and have sex with this.

    The type of person to use..

    Oh But I was drunk it doesn't count! You can't imagen how many girls have said that to me when I found out they had boyfriends lol

    Or. Ohh I don't remember it so it can't be bad.

    Leave her man this typ of person isn't a good person to be in a relationship with
    She is the one at fault here. Not you. Not her friends HER!
  • Jan 30, 2008, 03:53 PM
    raggablue
    At a real party, you should be surrounded by your friends all having as good time as you are.
    But if everyone is too blazed or K'd-up to move then it isn't going to be much fun
  • Feb 1, 2009, 06:35 AM
    novak
    Confused with her.
    My girlfriend is crabby at me. She has been negleting me. Text me like twice a day when she isn't with me a 15 minute drive to her house takes her an hour. And she say she drives slow. When she is at my house she just wants to be alone. And I asked her to come to the pool and she no she done like it but wiil go with her family and I'm not family enough. We been together for 13mnths. And it made me angry because she won't talk to me. Just because I was going to the pool with my friend and she wouldn come. Cos she wanted to stay at my house. Am I in the wrong?
  • Feb 1, 2009, 06:58 AM
    tickle

    Novak, I think she is playing games with you. Ignore her for a while and she will come around I am sure. Show sounds a little immature and confused about her feelings for you.

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