He is the daddy of a wonderful 2 year old boy, but he has strings attached. A manipulative baby momma. Only since we've been together have I been able to make him see that she takes advantage of his kindness and generosity. For instance momma tries to makes him feel guilty for not keeping their son overnight at his house during the weekdays, even though daddy sees his son everyday immediately after work, and also keeps him during the whole weekend. She is so self centered she doesn't want to acknowledge the sacrifice the daddy makes at work. He has had to arrive late, or not go to work at all because he doesn't have anyone to watch their son since momma "conveniently" couldn't pick him up when she said she would. And by the way, daddy's job is the only source of child support given to the baby, aside from governmental food stamps that momma receives. And when she's confronted on that situation, all she says is "So?" She doesn't care what happens to the daddy or anyone else as long as she can enjoy the youth and lack of responsibilities she had before getting pregnant. And on top of all this, she has become an increasingly irresponsible mother for the past several months. Just recently, while the daddy kept his son the entire weekend, momma ran off to have a quickie marriage with a guy she met only a couple weeks prior. Also, some of the family members in her home report that she is verbally abusive to the son. Calling him things like "stupid" for wetting his diaper. She is far from mother of the year, and the daddy ends up compensating for her parenting inadequacy. Is her selfishness and radical behavior considered enough grounds to take her to court so daddy can get full custody? If not, what kind of evidence would be necessary for a wining case?

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Originally Posted by Vuala_Ahem

He is the daddy of a wonderful 2 year old boy, but he has strings attached. A manipulative baby momma. Only since we've been together have I been able to make him see that she takes advantage of his kindness and generosity. For instance momma tries to makes him feel guilty for not keeping their son overnight at his house during the weekdays, even though daddy sees his son everyday immediately after work, and also keeps him during the whole weekend. She is so self centered she doesn't want to acknowledge the sacrifice the daddy makes at work. He has had to arrive late, or not go to work at all because he doesnt have anyone to watch their son since momma "conveniently" couldn't pick him up when she said she would. And by the way, daddy's job is the only source of child support given to the baby, aside from governmental food stamps that momma recieves. And when she's confronted on that situation, all she says is "So?" She doesn't care what happens to the daddy or anyone else as long as she can enjoy the youth and lack of responsibilities she had before getting pregnant. And on top of all this, she has become an increasingly irresponsible mother for the past several months. Just recently, while the daddy kept his son the entire weekend, momma ran off to have a quickie marriage with a guy she met only a couple weeks prior. Also, some of the family members in her home report that she is verbally abusive to the son. Calling him things like "stupid" for wetting his diaper. She is far from mother of the year, and the daddy ends up compensating for her parenting inadequacy. Is her selfishness and radical behavior considered enough grounds to take her to court so daddy can get full custody? If not, what kind of evidence would be necessary for a wining case?

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I'm a little concerned if the daddy never saw this before you pointed this out to him; that being said -

What does the custody order say? It's very, very difficult to get full custody unless the child is actually abused and/or in danger. I don't see that happening here.

You could try on the emotional abuse - name calling - if those family members are willing to come to Court and testify, particularly if the child is harmed by the name calling. I'd back that up with a report from a Physician or social worker if you can.

Not saying any of this is fair but this is, unfortunately in some cases, how it is.

There needs to be a court ordered custody agreement, it shouild state specific times for visitation and specific child support to be paid. Perhaps a joint custody where he has the child a week, she has the child a week.

Maybe if your going to court for a custody issue as you have described then you may want to request a parental evaluation. They aren't cheap but they can be worth it if things your saying are going on. Whenever there is a fight over a child there is no winner. Another thing he might look into now before doing anything at all with the courts is take a voluntary parenting class. Also document everything he does with his child. I know it sounds weird but that's what he's going to have to do to possibly increase custody. As most lawyers can tell you for a man to get full custody it almost takes a act of congress to have it happen.
< side note > a parental evaluation isn't cheap.. $1500 to $2000 usually but its more then the courts will give you in time. Both parents take it and it's a full battery of tests.