I've been with my girlfriend for a little over a year and
We have not done anything sexually other then "make out"
Yes I've talked to her about it she replied " she wasnt ready "
As all of u may answer "then u wait" but my question is
How important is intimacy in a relationship

How old are you?

Sixteen

Hm. 16... she may not feel comfortable having sex, but does she say she's not ready for other things, (groping, rubbing, dry humping, oral, etc?)

I don't want to have sex either

I don't want a baby.


But other forms of intimacy she doesn't want to do either

Sexual intimacy is important but it's not the ultimate for a relationship. Sexual intimacy will bring you closer, but only if there is good emotional intimacy.

Does she have any religious beliefs which may be holding her back? There may also be trust issues involved - there may be something in her past where she has been hurt in a relationship or on a sexual level and the thought of being sexual with you in any way may scare her. She may not feel ready to open up to you about such things, and only a level of emotional intimacy will make her feel secure enough to share herself with you (mind and body).

There are ways of being intimiate without being sexual - kissing, holding hands, cuddling, sharing dreams and thoughts all build intimacy. The sex thing will come in time and if there are other personal issues holding her back, then she may need to see a therapist or counsellor. But ultimately that's up to her.

Your desires are normal

But if she's not ready, you cannot push her

If you don't like the relationship in this context you have two choices... stay with her and don't complain, or leave and find someone who is more compatible.

It doesn't have to be more complicated

Intimacy is important (I moved your question to teens, where you might get more answers)... but trust is MORE important.

Trust will build intimacy.

She has to trust that you are not going to push her into doing more than she's comfortable with, she has to trust that you're not going to run and tell your friends what you've done together, she has to trust that you're going to be there for a long time.

Building trust takes TIME. Yes, a year is a long time at 16... but it's not that long in the grand scheme of things.

Either go only as far as she's comfortable with, for intimacy, or you'll just push her away from wanting ANY kind of sexual interplay.

I think that kissing, cuddling, a little groping (clothes ON, please!) and some necking, along with holding hands and a lot of talking is all the intimacy you should need at your age.

Thank you guys.

Because my ultimate concerns that I see so many marriages even end because of lack of intimacy I don't want our relationship to end

At your age, you need to enjoy the relationship for what it is... a learning experience. You are understanding how relationships can work... but stop with the marriage talk.

You are 16. Don't try to elevate this to the level of marriage. You are making things complicated.

Relax, enjoy the relationship.

Well I am 16, and I would say give your girlfriend TIME... Cause I was in a relationship where I got hurt and that makes me not be able to trust guys fully. There's no need to rush in my mind if you like her for who she is, then stick to making out. If not then find someone else. Its high school, in my word "there's a bagillion other fish in the sea"

Sex can really mess up a teenagers relationship, I really wish I had waited

Once you have sex, you will want to do it again, then again, then again, then you will be at the point were you are doing it everyday, after every fight, after everything, I would adives on waiting. And it is good that both of you arnt ready

As I stated I didn't want to engage in sexual intercourse

I'm asking this question myself but I would say that it is very important in a relationship especially for guys. I guess u'll have to wait on her until she's ready.