My boyfriend is currently living 2000 miles away from me, going to school, so we are in a long distance relationship, every time we are together, we at least have sex a couple times in the week periods we get to meet up. :) I hadn't seen him for 5 months, and I flew out to see him for New Years, and to be with him and his family for a week, and he would not have sex with me, I'd try to start it; and he'd put a stop to it right away, but would then, help himself. I asked him if it was me, and he told me that it was not me. I asked him if he was attracted to me, and if it was because I was fat, and he said no, and that I'm not fat, and that I'm beautiful, but I don't believe him, because why would he not want to have sex with me? What are your guys opinions? Help me please :(... oh, and a sidenote, when I got off my plane, and he was there waiting for me, when I ran and gave him a huge hug and kiss, he whispered in my ear how he needed sex, but yet, he wouldn't have sex with me. I'm confused.

Ask him, "what's up with not puttin out for you?"

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Originally Posted by skyprincess

My boyfriend is currently living 2000 miles away from me, going to school, so we are in a long distance relationship, every time we are together, we at least have sex a couple times in the week periods we get to meet up. :) I hadn't seen him for 5 months, and I flew out to see him for New Years, and to be with him and his family for a week, and he would not have sex with me, I'd try to start it; and he'd put a stop to it right away, but would then, help himself. I asked him if it was me, and he told me that it was not me. I asked him if he was attracted to me, and if it was because I was fat, and he said no, and that I'm not fat, and that I'm beautiful, but I don't believe him, because why would he not want to have sex with me? What are your guys opinions? Help me please :( ... oh, and a sidenote, when I got off my plane, and he was there waiting for me, when I ran and gave him a huge hug and kiss, he whispered in my ear how he needed sex, but yet, he wouldn't have sex with me. I'm confused.

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I've tried asking him and he won't give me a straight answer, and that he "doesn't" know why. =/

You guys aren't talking to each other. And I think he may be trying to see if this is all abou sex, or is there more. Do you talk about where this is headed and if your both headed in the same direction?

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I'd try to start it; and he'd put a stop to it right away, but would then, help himself.

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I have no clue what helping himself is.

Helping himself is, masturbation.

Yes, we've talked about the future of our relationship, and we both want the same things.
He is coming back out to me in September, and he is going to move in with me. :)
We've talked about our future; and we both want to be with each other, and, eventually get married once he is done with school. I'm just so confused; we have such an open relationship and we don't hide anything and I feel that he is, I tried to talk to him a little bit more about it last night, and it just ended in a fight and us going to bed mad at each other.

Did this happen while you guys were in the parents' house? Could that be an issue?

Not to scare you but from experience when my boyfriend stopped having sex with me, its cause he was already getting it from another girl.

Not to scare you but from experience when my boyfriend stopped having sex with me, its cause he was already getting it from another girl. Might not be the case at all though.

Yes, we were at his parents house, on the Mountain (his dad is a lawyer and his mom is a professor so they have lots of money and own tons of property) lol, but, it hasn't stopped him before, we also went up to his college to go drop off some things - and no one was there, as school had not started back up yet, but yet, he was still holding out =/ so I really don't think that is an issue. He claims there is nobody else, and I want to believe him, and part of me does but another part of me isn't letting me.

I sure woud be talking to him, because if there is no one else, then there is an area of your life that needs attention, maybe the coming moving in, has him with second thoughts. Maybe he thinks your cheating, and I know when he rejected you, how did you know he was masterbating?

Maybe he cheated on you and he has a STD and does not want to hurt you. I don't know many guys that won't have sex with a woman even if they are ugly. The amount of time you were away, he would want sex. One other thing, he might think you would have figured out that he had sex with another woman if he had sex with you.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

I sure woud be talking to him, because if there is no one else, then there is an area of your life that needs attention, maybe the coming moving in, has him with second thoughts. Maybe he thinks your cheating, and I know when he rejected you, how did you know he was masterbating?

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I know he was masturbating because he did it next to me while we were laying in bed together, I just sighed, rolled over and went to bed. I'm pretty sure that he has not cheated on me; I'm pretty confident and I want to believe that; and he knows I am faithful, I am probably the most faithful and too honest of a person out there on this planet <and it gets me in trouble sometimes too!> Lol. I'm not sure, he says that part of him is "Scared" of moving in, because, it would mean he is starting his life; before he is even done with college, I told him I don't want to pressure him, and he doesn't have too but he still insists that he has too and wants too. Why can't he just be so straight forward?

I have never heard of this in my life, but suspect he was trying to show you something, or get a reaction. Maybe he is hooked on self pleasure, but whatever it is, you should take off the love blinders, and talk to him, as in why he did what he did. I can't believe you just shrugged it off, and rolled over. Then was the time to talk.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

I have never heard of this in my life, but suspect he was trying to show you something, or get a reaction. maybe he is hooked on self pleasure, but whatever it is, you should take off the love blinders, and talk to him, as in why he did what he did. I can't believe you just shrugged it off, and rolled over. Then was the time to talk.

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I normally would have tried to talk to him but I didn't feel like fighting and I was tired (I had just flew from Oregon to Michigan) to be with him, after flying to Canada and back (I'm a flight attendant), so I had been flying all day long and didn't really have the energy to start what it probably would have started. He is coming out here, because I just got a call that my Grandmother may not make it past the weekend, so we'll talk then, I've tried talking to him on the phone about it earlier today but it didn't get anywhere; maybe in person would be better!