Mouthy 17 yr old what to do
My husband and I have been together for almost 5 years now. He had 2 children and I had 2 children when we met and we now have one together. We try to keep everyone together as one big happy family. Lately this has been hard to do. Our oldest who is now 17 has become so mouthy and disrespectful to everyone in the house especially me. He will not listen to anything that is said to him with out mouthing back at us. He thinks he is an adult now and he is to make his own rules while we take care of his needs. He will not follow family rules under any conditions. He will tell me he doesn't need to listen to me that I am not his mom, and that he doesn't need me in his life - that his father would be better off with out me. His Dad had told him several times to shut his mouth and has grounded him for his actions, but he will not stop. He will do everything he can to push my buttons to show me he will not listen to me under any conditions. He thinks that when he wants something it is to be given to him on a silver platter with out any questions. He doesn't have a license due to I won't take him for the test because of his actions and mouth. I don't feel he is responsible enough to be behind the wheel of a car, if he can't control himself on a normal day basis. He will tell me to screw off, call me the B word , tell me to shut the F up etc.. No matter what groundment he receives he will not stop. When his father is not at home he will do what ever he wants saying he doesn't need to listen to me, but when his father returns he will try to say that I was trying to fight with him. His dad knows he will not listen to me, and has tried to help but to no success. We know when he turns 18 that this is going to get worse. He will be 18 the beginning of his senior year. He has already said about quiting school, moving away etc.. We told him well if you think you can make it on your own than when you are finished from school and graduate than you can go out on your own and not until than. He tells us once he is 18 we can't stop him. We don't want the kid to destroy his life. We only want the best for him but what do we do if he will not listen to a word said to him. I know I am not his bio-mom but I try to be a mom figure to him by supplying him with his needs, helping with homework, cooking meals etc It seems like the only time I am good enough for him is if he needs a ride somewhere or if he wants something other than that he treats me like I am nothing. So I stopped driving him places and getting him things and told him until he shows me some respect that I will not do a thing for him. Well it didn't work due to he just got mouthier with me. Even today he came into my room and asked me to drive him to his bus stop due to it was raining. I asked him what am I your mom today due to you need something. He yelled Screw You I don't need you and stormed out the room. Well needless to say he walked to the bus stop in the rain while I drove the other kids down to it. He will just walk into our bed room with out knocking on the door first like he was told to do, and when he is told to get out of our room he will yell "what ever screw you" He won't follow the house rules nothing. What are we to do? He can be a good kid when he wants to be, and he will help with things when he wants to, but always under his terms or if he wants something in return and only than. I know that this is tearing me and my husband apart. It causes so many fights in the house anymore and it is not good for the younger kids to see, or hear the things he says and does. But he will not listen. Any suggestions on what I can do?
