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-   -   Weird relationship. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=169902)

  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:03 PM
    justme005
    Weird relationship.
    Hey everybody!

    So I have this werid situation... this guy who's like 24 (im20) has a girlfriend... but we hung out in the summer and hooked up or whatever... so he's bak from school now and wants to hook up again. But I feel bad since he has a girlfriend now. But he came over and one thing led to another and I ended up going down on him... sooo since I never really do like this... he's like oh yeaa we can hang out whenever and ill teach you some stuff... and all this... so its just weird... is he using me? I mean he's real nice and mature unlike other at my college... what do you think of this? I mean I could use practice at some stuff... I just don't know what to do... I know its not rtie and I'm not a slut... I haven't been w. a guy in a yr so... whatever.. let me know what you think.
  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:08 PM
    kino4444
    You are a slut. Think if he was going out with you and he went somewhere and hooked up with some other girl. You wouldn't like that would you? So just keep in mind how you would feel if it were the other way around. If you want practice or whatever then you need to go out and find you someone else WHO IS SINGLE and you can practice with them, but then again you could just wait till you find someone who really cares about you and it won't matter how much you know cause they can help you get all the practice you need. So my advice is stop doing what you are doing with him and find someone who cares about you and you won't have t worry about how much you know and you will be learning with someone who respects you. =)
  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:13 PM
    shygrneyzs
    He is using you and you are using him. He has a girlfriend and you are the accessible side entertainment. Why don't you call his girlfriend and ask her what she thinks?
  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:18 PM
    ISneezeFunny
    Holy $hit... no need calling her a slut. Really.

    To answer your question, yes... he is using you. Only for sex.

    If you continue, you'll be putting a cleft between him and his girlfriend... and you'll be "that girl he's cheating with"
  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:20 PM
    EuRa
    You are both using each other. The only difference is that you know for a fact what's been going on on your end. You have no idea if he's already done stuff with other girls at college, despite what he says (MEN LIE!). So if you do anything, you better be careful.

    And the whole "teaching" thing is an old trick. I used to say that too. "Yeah I can teach you how to give head" or "how to do different sexual positions", etc. I didn't really give a damn about teaching her, I just wanted mine. But that sounded mean, and "teaching" sounds like I'm trying to do you a favor, so that's how I worded it.

    It's all up to you. As long as you know what's going on and you don't mind, then go ahead. But I wouldn't expect any sort of relationship out of it. Ever.
  • Jan 7, 2008, 02:38 PM
    kino4444
    Okay.. so slut was harsh... but its hard when I have been the other girl and its hard when you know how it feels when your boyfriend is screwing around on you. So I am truly sorry that I called you a slut. BUT think of how you would feel if you were her.

    Again I am sorry for calling you a slut.
  • Jan 7, 2008, 04:29 PM
    yvonne1978
    No one's perfect. So you gave him head,big deal you say you don't really do that kind of thing,then don't just respect yourself and find someone to learn with that wants to learn with you. Not use you. You're a big girl you know you're being used,now do you want to continue to be used that s the real question. Plenty of men out there find one you don't have to share. No one deserves to be the other person. And no one deserves to be cheated on...
  • Jan 7, 2008, 05:35 PM
    justme005
    Thanks everybody.

    Yehh I'm not a slut... that's for girls who sleep around and stuff... this was a one time thing I think... I mean I live in jersey and his girlfriend lives in Texas so whatever I'm not going to worry about this. Ill just stop it now. This is not a huge deal to me. But yes I def. think we were using each other. It was fun while it lasted. Ha.
  • Jan 7, 2008, 06:14 PM
    AnnieMac713
    Just don't REGRET it; there's plenty of boys without girlfriends.I"m sure.Why not hook up with someone without a girlfriend.
  • Jan 7, 2008, 09:45 PM
    talaniman
    You can be forgiven for a mistake, but to continue to service him, with full knowledge he is taken, then you would be helping him cheat. Then you would truly be a slut. Glad you have decided to leave him alone.
  • Jan 8, 2008, 12:13 AM
    MissingHim2Much
    I could never knowingly be the other woman... I might be self centered but I can't imagine being someone's dirty little secret. I want to be his one and only and not his second choice, the one that gets the left overs when his first choice isn't around. I hope you have more respect for yourself then that.
  • Jan 8, 2008, 05:23 AM
    Sad Soul
    He's using you because he knows you're the type that will provide sexual favors to a man who is already in a relationship. It's that simple. And it's a blessing for him, to have a woman like you around, because there are many other females who won't lower themselves to that level. Yep... you're a real gem in his eyes.

    In his mind, you are the girl that is willing to help a man cheat. This is actually a hard fact (for now). I suggest you change this, and get your dignity back. I'm positive you can do better than this situation. Actually, I'm sure you deserve much better than this situation.

    Come on now.
  • Jan 8, 2008, 12:40 PM
    justme005
    Thanks. I appreciate you input!

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