How will I ever learn to trust again?
Oh my god I'm so furious right now. My ex did everything he always promised he wouldn't do. He knew I wasn't even looking for a serious relationship when I met him because id been hurt so much before. But he hated people that cheated and constantly talked bad about people we knew who did it. Then he got me to fall in love with him. And I know he loved me to at one time. We both thought we were each others soul mates. I really still think that. And he had never cheated on anyone before.
So now not only are we broke up because he was talking to and kissing this other girl he used to know, but he's already dating her. And I saw she posted on his myspace that she loves him. This is unbelievable. Because me and him had real love not so long ago and he never told anyone he loved them before me. And he's only been talking to her over the past month. I am so pissed and confused right now. How can he just replace me that quick? Its just his old crush from high school they never even dated or talked before.
And when we talked last the things he said just hurt because he said he loves me and always will think about me no matter who he's with but we were just to serious and he needed time to himself. He says he hopes we will be together again some day but he's risking everything. Because I may never want to be with him after I have time to think about this. But how is jumping straight into another relationship taking time?
I just went and got a tattoo to remind myself that I will never love someone so much again. Or ever expect so much just because someone says so. It's a phoenix that says 'comfortably numb' with a peace sign in the background. Really that is how I feel now is numb. And I know I will never give so much of my heart to one person again. And I won't regret this tattoo because it represents more than just love. Its my life. And even if we never ever are together again I was the happiest I've ever seen myself with him so I won't want to forget. But now I'm so completely jaded and I know I won't ever allow myself to trust anyone again.
Has anyone else been through something like this that has some advice? I would appreciate it.
