Well I just found out yesterday that my boyfriend of 5 yrs (he just bought me an engagement ring) cheated on me. It started about 2 1/2 months ago and ended a mth ago. He said it only happened 5 times but the second time was a Friday night when we went out with friends to the pub to celebrate my birthday (the sunday) I went home early and he stayed out with his best friend... until he came home 10.30am the next morning already showered.(I thought something was up). He even introduced me to her and we were friends.

I love him we have 3 kids (2 are his, the eldest is mine from a previous relationship but he looks at her as his own). I want to make it work, but I want time, and space to clear my head. I have told him he is not allowed to have any contact what so ever with her, and that while I am having my space he is not to go near another female & that we have to have counselling. He claims that it was a stress relief because he has been so stressed at work lately, but I said to him that is no excuse.

How do I forgive him? I love him, he is an excellent father.:(

To regain trust in someone takes a long time, but counseling is a good start to being guided through the process.

I have since foumd out that he also di it in his/our car, so I have now told him that I need to buy a different car. He is willng to sell his and buy a different car.

He has told me the truth every time I have asked him about it. So that is a start. I need to know that he can be truthful. :(

Let me see, you told him he can not have any more contact, just like perhaps you told him he could have contact earlier, of course not, he was not suppose to have contact with her before, and once is a mistake, 5 times is a planned affair.

If you can work it out make sure you have a lot of counseling first

Well he is not ready for marriage because he has commitment issues. You need to break up with him that was not right what he did and how could you trust him after 5 times he did that to you. Even though you still have feelings for him you need to let him go that's the best thing for you. Clearly he's not ready for a relationship