Mom putting me on a guilt trip
Hi,
I am a 27 year old young woman who is independent, successful, and self-sufficient. I have been never caused my parents problems, but have always charted my own course. As a teen, I moved out from my mother's house into my dad's to escape from the stress that she caused me by being controlling. I have a surface relationship with her to protect myself.
I have no doubt that she loves me, however when I make a decision (i.e. not coming to her home 4 hours from mine for Christmas), she always puts me on a guilt trip.
I am currently in a longterm relationship and I want to spend my Christmas day with my partner. My mother doesn't understand this. Because I am unmarried, she feels I should come to see her like I did in college. That is not the case and not what I want.
She sent me an email full of guilty undertones and I don't know how to respond. I have no interest in spending the holidays with her.
Thanks for any advice!