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-   -   Elderly aunt's hearing concern and her "cluelessness" (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=159947)

  • Dec 6, 2007, 10:38 AM
    swirlgirl
    Elderly aunt's hearing concern and her "cluelessness"
    :confused: My aunt has hearing aids, but she rarely wears them... the batteries are an expense as they only last her for about 3 days? Is this common? I realize she wants to save money, but what a waste if you don't wear them and they are of no use to herself or others? I have to constantly yell to make her hear me, on the phone, in public (embarrassing!) and in person... I am tired. Frankly, so is everyone of her contacts, friends, hairdresser etc. they are tired of yelling at her also. If you mention to her to put her hearing aids on, she has some excuse, no new batteries, can't locate them, and at one time she mentioned... I wish everyone had a hearing problem.. then they would know! Boy, do we know!

    It is getting to be that I do not care to carry on a conversation with her... It wears me out.
    Any advice... please don't tell me I am petty... if you have the same problem with someone you KNOW what I am talking about...

    The other issue with her is this... I used to take her shopping for her groceries, she would have me either to use her car, or to pay me $5 for gas. Then she would treat me to lunch at Wendy's, Dairy Queen or McDonald's. I enjoyed our outings.

    Now, she wants me to just get her shopping list, and go myself... no gas, no lunch... why this is not petty is, I am unemployed... I go deeper in debt every month... I don't tell her this as she would worry too much. She constantly complains about money, I KNOW all too well about that, I am in the same boat! Actually my boat is "rocking" much more than hers!

    I feel really used and resentful... if I had the money it would be no concern... but I feel taken advantaged of... my dad, her brother, whom is deceased... was the same way with money... she is not rich, but she has a son whom shares his proceeds from his business, she has no debt whatsoever. Please any advice would be appreciated... please no criticism... I care for a disabled adult son, whom lives with me and I have my hands full with him and the emontional turmoil... thanks for your constructive advice... perhaps most of all I just need to vent! :o
  • Dec 6, 2007, 02:58 PM
    N0help4u
    My a little reverse psychology would work. Have everybody not talk to her for a while and when she gets tired of her silent world maybe she will try to keep up with her batteries and where her hearing aid is. You shouldn't have to go through all that to be able to communicate with her. When she asks a question yell "you can't hear me" then maybe she will get the message.
  • Dec 6, 2007, 05:48 PM
    swirlgirl
    I was not able to finish my "agree" with, before it was posted! Thanks NOhelp4u... I will try the "You can't hear me!"... I think she also has some "selective" hearing... example: Her son was down (lives a state above us) and said the fridge was making noise. A little later I heard what he was talking about... it was a low scratching noise... and my aunt heard it! She was no further away from it than she is from me, when she can't hear me! Her son, even stated that she had "selective" hearing... :rolleyes:
  • Dec 6, 2007, 06:15 PM
    N0help4u
    One of my old boyfriends was born with one ear and he couldn't hear things in the room but he could hear a cars start two blocks away. Couple that with the selective hearing and you really can't trust what she actually does and doesn't hear so be careful what you say ::eek:
  • Dec 6, 2007, 06:35 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I am concerned over the batteries not lasting more than 3 days, this does not seem right at all, check with the company that prescribed them and fitted her for them, my dads lasted weeks and weeks before we had to change his.

    But often they sadly don't help as much as everyone wants them to, and some will actually cause feed back and also sometimes blurrs some of the speech. So often the user just does not like them
  • Dec 6, 2007, 06:39 PM
    N0help4u
    I have a feeling the 'batteries' is one of her 'excuses'
  • Dec 7, 2007, 07:54 AM
    swirlgirl
    Yes, it is attention I am sure like Nohelp4U says. It is also interesting to note.. I just thought of this... she has no answering phone... and does not want one, even as a gift! Several times last year... I had to rush over to her house to see if she was OK, as I had her neighbors and friends calling all concerned that they could not reach her... well, of course she was Ok... after the third time of this... I told them to not call me anymore, that they all needed to get a house key from her and check on her... they knew I was mad at her... she all acted innocent and I know she liked that everyone "dropped everything" and came to see that she was OK.

    Thanks for letting me vent!

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