I have a neighbor that keeps making false accusations about me. It all started back in February when she sent an email to my husband informing him that I threaten her and her children, have been witnessed vandalizing her car, and parents and staff at our children's school have witnessed me harassing or threatening her children. I have never done any of those things she accuses me of. Since that email, which I kept a copy of, I have chosen to ingnore her completely. I keep to myself, never have any contact with her whatsoever. I am a PTA member at the school that our children attend, and I am on a regular basis at the school. Now, recently this month I was told I am now being investigated by NCIS (our husbands are military) because she has made some sort of accusation regarding her children to CPS, and that got NCIS involved. I have done absolutely nothing this whole year to her or her children, and to keep matters from getting out of hand don't even aknowledge her existence. I thought everything had been fine that way and thought I was doing the right thing, when all of a sudden I am hit with this. I have now been asked to temporarily withdraw from all volunteer work, and only be at the school to either drop off my kids or pick them up until the investigation is done. The children at the school love me and so does the staff, and not one of them has ever seen me or heard of me harass any children let alone hers. I have steered clear of her home and therefore haven't ever been near her or her car. I just want to know if legally if there is anything I can do. I feel like I am being treated unfairly, as I have done nothing wrong. I can't help out at the school, I can't go on field trips with my kids because of her. If and when she is finally caught in a lie with NCIS and CPS, legally can I do anything to counter what she has done to me and my family? Thanks for any advice in advance.

I would file a counter charge with NCIS for harassment. I would demand to see Agent Gibbs (just kidding). Seriously I would demand to talk to the investigators and make sure the investigation is completed expeditiously.

Other than charging her with harassment and maybe getting a restraining order against her, I doubt if you can do anything more. It will be hard to prove you have materially suffered from her accusations.

Her going to NCIS may prove good for you. If NCIS completely clears you oreven founds no support for the accusations, you get a copy of that report. If she tries this again you have the report to show she has been making false accusations.

I was thinking the same as Scottgem. You need a restraining order.

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Originally Posted by vamosj

I have a neighbor that keeps making false accusations about me. It all started back in February when she sent an email to my husband informing him that I threaten her and her children, have been witnessed vandalizing her car, and parents and staff at our childrens school have witnessed me harassing or threatening her children. I have never done any of those things she accuses me of. Since that email, which I kept a copy of, I have chosen to ingnore her completely. I keep to myself, never have any contact with her whatsoever. I am a PTA member at the school that our children attend, and I am on a regular basis at the school. Now, recently this month I was told I am now being investigated by NCIS (our husbands are military) because she has made some sort of accusation regarding her children to CPS, and that got NCIS involved. I have done absolutely nothing this whole year to her or her children, and to keep matters from getting out of hand dont even aknowledge her existence. I thought everything had been fine that way and thought I was doing the right thing, when all of a sudden I am hit with this. I have now been asked to temporarily withdraw from all volunteer work, and only be at the school to either drop off my kids or pick them up until the investigation is done. The children at the school love me and so does the staff, and not one of them has ever seen me or heard of me harass any children let alone hers. I have steered clear of her home and therefore havent ever been near her or her car. I just want to know if legally if there is anything I can do. I feel like I am being treated unfairly, as I have done nothing wrong. I can't help out at the school, I can't go on field trips with my kids because of her. If and when she is finally caught in a lie with NCIS and CPS, legally can I do anything to counter what she has done to me and my family? Thanks for any advice in advance.

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Absolutely. You can retain an attorney for Defamation of Character, through both slander and libel. Slander is a malicious and false report given verbally. Libel is a malicious and false report that is written. Retaining an attorney does not always mean taking someone to court. They can send letters on your behalf and often that is all it takes. I would, however, make certain that there is nothing you could have done/said that could have been misinterpreted. I also would completely cooperate with any/all investigations and make sure you are nothing but helping (meaning not defensive... after all, those who have nothing to hide hide nothing). Good luck!
(And thanks for all the sacrifices your family makes!! I love & appreciate our armed forces and their families!! )

Well it looks as though this crazy neighbor is going through with this. We just got served papers and it looks as though she is going to have her daughter lie for her. I just don't understand why someone would go through so much trouble in order to get someone in trouble. Even including your daughter. Question is how do you prove a child is lying when basically it is going to come down to word vs. word? Also, if we do hire a lawyer and we end up winning, does this mean we can counter claim for all legal fee's including our lawyer?

Yes, if she makes false claims you can sue for court costs. But that shouldn't affect your decision to get a lawyer. If you want to lose this then forego a lawyer. But if you want to win, you NEED a lawyer. A lawyer will know how to frame a case so that the daughter's testimony will carry little weight.

You need to try and document everything. At some point they are going to have to reveal what they allege happened and when. Hopefully you can prove you weren't alone with them at that point. But these are the types of things a lawyer can help you to prepare for.

We are currently working on getting evidence. Work time cards, school volunteer sign in sheets. Going to try and get hand written statements from school staff about this also. I have never gotten a lawyer so I am not sure how I will be able to pay for this. Is it all dependent on the lawyer if you have to pay them up front, if you win the case, etc.. Thanks for your help ScottGem

Shop around. Most attys will give a free consultation. Explains the situation, listen to what they say, but don't make a decision until after you have talked to several. Ask friends, relatives, etc. for recommendations.

Good luck and keep us posted.

So far, there is a sexual assault order in place, but nothing from NCIS yet. I have not been questioned by them anymore, nor have been arrested. I willingly took a polygraph examination and of course passed that with no problems. My attorney has given a copy of it to the prosecutors office, but prosecutors have still not received anything from NCIS at this point. I really have been wanting to give a copy to NCIS but don't know if I should or not. I know when they questioned me for 3 hours back in December they wanted me to take one. I refused at the time saying it was because I wasn't willing to do anything without an attorney. As soon as I retained one, I let him know I wanted to take a polygraph as soon as possible, and he set me up with one that our courthouse is very familiar with, and has an excellent reputation with, has been an examiner for over 24 years. My attorney says all I can do right now is obey the protection order for the time being, and just wait to see what happens with the prosecutors office. I can't stand the waiting. It just really upsets me and makes me so mad that something like this has happened to me. I did nothing wrong to anyone's kid, let alone hers! Why should I have to deal with the inconvenience of a sexual assault order and not be able to involve myself with my kids' school all because of a crazy neighbor making up false accusations? Any new advice for me?? Thanks in advance.

Also, I was wondering... When I was interrogated by NCIS I told them that I would never have touched a child like that and that the mother was lying to them. I also told them we used to be friends, and I suspected her of having an affair with one of our mutual friends' husbands, and from then on, we were never friends again. The moment she thought I was going to say anything to the mutual friend, she went to her first, and fabricated a whole story about how I wanted to make up something like the affair to end their friendship, which was not true. The mutual friend believed her over me. Since then, both of them have done nothing but try to cause problems for me and my family. There was an email sent to my husband on the ship he is stationed on while in the middle east accusing me of harassing them and their kids at school, vandalising their cars, and saying students and staff have witnessed the harassment and put in complaints, and there are witnesses that saw me vandalize the car. To this day, the school principle says there has not ever been one complaint from any student, staff member, or parent, other than those two moms. There has never been a report of vandalism either. That is because I never did any of those things. I saved the email just in case I needed it in the future. NCIS has a copy and so does my attorney. Also in the email it says that if my husband can't put me in my place, it will take a trip to the courthouse to do just that. They threatened me back in April 2007 with this email, which I ignored, and now this is where I am. Can any of this be used to my advantage? Does this prove anything at all? Motive for what they have done? Even when we went to court in December for the protection order, the child's mother said that I supposedly touched her daughters genitals August 06 in my home, in which when asked if there was a medical or police report, she said "No, I just let it go." to the judge. She then said I followed her daughter into the bathroom on several occasions between January 07 and October 07, in which I forced her into a bathroom stall on these occasions and touched her genitals over her clothing, and once or twice waited in the bathroom for her daughter to come in and sat in the stall next to her and tried to grab at her. When asked once again about a police report or medical report, the mother said once again, " No, I just let it go." So, if this stuff all really did happen then why did she just now over a year later decide to get a protection order? It doesn't make any sense to me. Even the judge looked at her funny. She even brought the child into court with her that day, and the only thing separating her and me was my attorney, and the child was all smiles bouncing around looking around like nothing was wrong. Isn't there something I can do?? My children have also been affected by the whole situation. I can't be at my children's after school programs at school because of this. I have always been very involved in my children's schooling and now am unable all because of a lie. Please give me any advice if you have any.

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Originally Posted by vamosj

Also, I was wondering.... When I was interrogated by NCIS I told them that I would never have touched a child like that and that the mother was lying to them. I also told them we used to be friends, and I suspected her of having an affair with one of our mutual friends' husbands, and from then on, we were never friends again. The moment she thought I was going to say anything to the mutual friend, she went to her first, and fabricated a whole story about how I wanted to make up something like the affair to end their friendship, which was not true. The mutual friend believed her over me. Since then, both of them have done nothing but try to cause problems for me and my family. There was an email sent to my husband on the ship he is stationed on while in the middle east accusing me of harassing them and their kids at school, vandalising their cars, and saying students and staff have witnessed the harassment and put in complaints, and there are witnesses that saw me vandalize the car. To this day, the school principle says there has not ever been one complaint from any student, staff member, or parent, other than those two moms. There has never been a report of vandalism either. That is because I never did any of those things. I saved the email just in case I needed it in the future. NCIS has a copy and so does my attorney. Also in the email it says that if my husband can't put me in my place, it will take a trip to the courthouse to do just that. They threatened me back in April 2007 with this email, which I ignored, and now this is where I am. Can any of this be used to my advantage?? Does this prove anything at all? Motive for what they have done? Even when we went to court in December for the protection order, the childs mother said that I supposedly touched her daughters genitals August 06 in my home, in which when asked if there was a medical or police report, she said "No, I just let it go." to the judge. She then said I followed her daughter into the bathroom on several occasions between January 07 and October 07, in which I forced her into a bathroom stall on these occasions and touched her genitals over her clothing, and once or twice waited in the bathroom for her daughter to come in and sat in the stall next to her and tried to grab at her. When asked once again about a police report or medical report, the mother said once again, " No, I just let it go." So, if this stuff all really did happen then why did she just now over a year later decide to get a protection order?? It doesnt make any sense to me. Even the judge looked at her funny. She even brought the child into court with her that day, and the only thing separating her and me was my attorney, and the child was all smiles bouncing around looking around like nothing was wrong. Isnt there something I can do??? My children have also been affected by the whole situation. I can't be at my childrens after school programs at school because of this. I have always been very involved in my childrens schooling and now am unable all because of a lie. Please give me any advice if you have any.

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You have an Attorney for this complicated, serious situation - my advice would be to go over all of this with your Attorney. He/she knows the situation and the laws in your State.

I understand you are nervous and upset but the "opinions" of people other than your Attorney are just that - opinions and not legal advice and will probably just confuse and upset you further.

Sounds like you are doing all you can. I would badger your attorney to get NCIS and anyone else to resolve the problem.

Just an update: Since the last time I wrote, the neighbor has tried to say I violated the protection order against me twice, and both times the police or NCIS have never came to even talk to me and I have never been arrested because I haven't violated it ever!! She loves to call the police almost on a regular basis and try to get me into trouble. The police are over there on a weekly basis over complaints she makes not only about me, but I am sure others. The prosecutor that was supposed to handle the case moved to another court, so it was handed over to yet another prosecutor that said he would have an answer in about a week, but it has been a month and a half. The prosecutor also told my lawyer that he talked about the case with NCIS and they even told him they found absolutely no evidence to support what my neighbor is accusing me of, but the prosecutor says he wants to look it over and then have his decision in a week. NCIS also made sure to let me know that I shouldn't worry because they found nothing to back what the neighbor says. Anytime recently when she tries to accuse me of anything with the police, it gets handed over to NCIS, and really I think that they are tired of hearing her complaints, because they don't even come and question me anytime she puts in a complaint or says I violated the protection order. Really, I am just tired of the whole mess. I feel that there is nothing I can do to further this along. Like I said before, I already took a polygraph that shows I am not lying when I say I didn't molest the girl, and I also am not lying when saying I have never lied to anyone in an authority position either. I just would like to get on with my life, and the first step is to get back into court once I get a letter from the prosecutor saying there will be no charges at this time because there is no evidence to support the accusations.. I want to go back into court at that point and ask for the order to be removed, and sue her for what she has done to me and my family. I need to be able to involve myself with my children's school activities, and as of right now, can't because of this whole mess. My husband is leaving the end of the month and won't be back until summer, so I am the only parent. I can't go to my kids' conferences, band concerts or even my sons 6th grade graduation now because of this whole thing. And when asking my lawyer to see if we can at least get back into court to make amendments so I can go to these few things, he says to me he wants nothing to do with it and I am on my own. How is that?? I paid him $2500 for what? To treat me in the beginning like I am guilty, and now that it looks like I am not, he doesn't want to help me anymore? All he has done is stand in court for 10 minutes with me and instead of fight the protection order, tell me to say nothing and not fight it, so now it is causing me all these problems, and he has sent a few emails off to the prosecutor asking if he has made a decision yet... I am very disappointed and ANGRY at the way my attorney has been treating the whole thing. Is what he is doing wrong? Is there something I can do at all? Don't I have any rights?? Any advice would help greatly. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I feel like no one can help me, and I can't even help myself. Thanks again in advance...

I would contact another attorney and sue your original one. I would also badger the prosecutor to prosecute or drop the case and remove the restraining order.

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Originally Posted by vamosj

Just an update: And when asking my lawyer to see if we can at least get back into court to make amendments so I can go to these few things, he says to me he wants nothing to do with it and I am on my own. How is that??? I paid him $2500 for what?? To treat me in the beginning like I am guilty, and now that it looks like I am not, he doesnt want to help me anymore?? All he has done is stand in court for 10 minutes with me and instead of fight the protection order, tell me to say nothing and not fight it, so now it is causing me all these problems, and he has sent a few emails off to the prosecutor asking if he has made a decision yet..... I am very dissappointed and ANGRY at the way my attorney has been treating the whole thing. Is what he is doing wrong?? Is there something I can do at all? Dont I have any rights??? Any advice would help greatly. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I feel like noone can help me, and I can't even help myself. Thanks again in advance......

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I shortened your quote - didn't change anything, just erased some of it.

Your Attorney is probably either burned out or tired of the whole situation. I understand you are upset, disappointed and angry but this is an explosive, nasty situation and the more you badger and provide people with all the little details the more they glaze over.

If you look at your retainer agreement you will see that your $2,500 didn't just pay for 10 minutes in Court - it paid for every telephone call, letter, minute of research. That's a pretty reasonable sum where I live for representing you in this complicated situation.

I suspect there is more to this than is being posted.

I received a letter from my attorney today and attached is an email from the prosecutor which says this:
This email is in follow-up to our conversation yesterday regarding your client. First, we do not have a record of receiving any reports of any criminal investigation from law enforcement regarding this individual. Second, I recall some time last year a discussion with the former prosecutor that he had spoken to someone from law enforcement about a complaint involving this individual. I believe that discussion was based on a phone call or verbal communication he had law enforcement since we never received any reports on your client. My recollection of the discussion was that based on the information he had, there was not a case that could be prosecuted. My memory is somewhat vague on the discussion but I do recall some consensus that based on law enforcement's investigation and verbal communications, we would not be taking any action on your client. I don't know why we did not receive any reports on paper regarding your client, but there is no record of receiving anything on her in our database.

The attorney I have been dealing with is a criminal defense attorney. He is telling me also that he believes I can take this email from the prosecutor and go forward with getting into court and getting the protection order lifted. He also says he wants no part of it. In opinion, is this enough to go and try to get the order lifted? I now have this email, along with my polygraph and that is what I have to try and get the order lifted. I also know somewhere along the line he also told me that if and when I was ever to get a confirmation of decision from the prosecutor I had every right to go back in, get the order lifted, then sue my neighbor for everything she has caused. Any advice as to what to do next? Thanks again in advance.

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Originally Posted by vamosj

I recieved a letter from my attorney today and attached is an email from the prosecutor which says this:
This email is in follow-up to our conversation yesterday regarding your client. First, we do not have a record of receiving any reports of any criminal investigation from law enforcement regarding this individual. Second, I recall some time last year a discussion with the former prosecutor that he had spoken to someone from law enforcement about a complaint involving this individual. I believe that discussion was based on a phone call or verbal communication he had law enforcement since we never received any reports on your client. My recollection of the discussion was that based on the information he had, there was not a case that could be prosecuted. My memory is somewhat vague on the discussion but I do recall some consensus that based on law enforcement's investigation and verbal communications, we would not be taking any action on your client. I don't know why we did not receive any reports on paper regarding your client, but there is no record of receiving anything on her in our database.

The attorney I have been dealing with is a criminal defense attorney. He is telling me also that he believes I can take this email from the prosecutor and go forward with getting into court and getting the protection order lifted. He also says he wants no part of it. In opinion, is this enough to go and try to get the order lifted? I now have this email, along with my polygraph and that is what I have to try and get the order lifted. I also know somewhere along the line he also told me that if and when I was ever to get a confirmation of decision from the prosecutor I had every right to go back in, get the order lifted, then sue my neighbor for everything she has caused. Any advice as to what to do next? Thanks again in advance.

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Your Attorney is far more familiar with the laws in your area, the entire situation, has the paperwork at hand - I would go with what he/she said.

A lot also depends on how people present and express themselves - your Attorney has to take a close look at all the circumstances.

After the upset this neighbor has caused you, would I go forward - you bet I would!

My attorney says as of now, he has fulfilled his end of the agreement. He received an email saying that the prosecutors have formally declined any charges. Since my attorney is a criminal attorney, he has no case to look forward to. So, now that charges are being declined, the NCIS office has told us that they are waiting for that letter so they can finally close the case. Now, what I am needing to figure out is what do I need to do next? Do I just walk into the court house and ask who I need to see to set up a court date? I would like to get into court and get this sexual assault protection order removed. How do I find out what papers I need and such to go further? What kind of attorney do I look for next if I can't do the protection order hearing without one? And what kind of attorney do I need to get back into court and sue her?? My criminal attorney told me I have every right once the order is dropped to not only get a restraining order for the harassment, but I can sue her also. Thanks in advance. I would like to get back into court as soon as I can, but am not sure as to where to start.

Hi - I just want to let you know that stuff like this happens every single day to people all over the world. Life is not fair. The justice system does not always work and the best advice I can give you is MOVE! I know - it happened to me and my husband. My husband is now a convicted felon - that's how far our case went - all through it we screamed we were innocent - we said no one would make us move - this is the USA and all that stuff. 15 years later ( the original guy who targeted us killed himself 10 years ago) but I still have his buddy - small harassments over the years until recently - bang - we get another summons to court for harassment - guess what - we are going to move. It is not worth it.