i really like this guy, and he's told my bestfriend.that he likes me. but he's shy. almost shyer then me....thats the problem. were shy. he won;t get the guts to ask me out. and i'm pondering on the fact if i should ask him out or wait. i don't want to be a sterotype and wait for the traditional boy ask girl out type of thing. i want it to be whats best for us. and i'm thinking. i'll ask him out. but what do i say? how could i get him alone. middle school is not a tv show and nothing really happens as planned. theres really no perfect moments. and no perfect guy. so please take these into understanding when helping me out.
thanks a ton you guy.
<3lil miss vixen

Quite a predicimate you are in there.

A couple options:

Since you are both shy, why not call him at home afterschool one day? That is assuming you can get your hands on his phone number.

Another option is to go over to his house, odds are you will be able to talk to him alone that way as well.

Hi, miss vixen,
The other answer is really good... I also suggest calling him, if you can get his phone number. And, go see him, if you know where he lives.
NO, there is absolutely nothing wrong in asking him out yourself.
You could also walk up to him at school, and ask him "Would you walk over here with me for a couple of minutes"? Then lead him off to where no one else is. Ask him if he would like to go out with you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!
I do wish you the best of luck.

My current boyfriend Pete and I were like that. Neither one of us are really shy people - but because we liked each other, but were too scared to make a move we did not do anything for months. Just said "Hi" in passing.

It was only because I had the courage to go up to him on a night out and say "hi - how are you" and develop a conversation that anything happened.

We were talking for ages and in amongst the conversation I told him that I really liked him! I found out he already knew and got really embarrassed but that was when he said he felt the same - so we then exchanged numbers and made plans to go out on a date. That was over a month ago now and we are really happy together. We talk about anything & everything allthe time and always enjoy eachothers company.

Go up to him and say hi - ask him how is and just have a general conversation then try to drop in at some stage that you like him. I know it's hard when you are shy (My friend has the very same problem) you just have to be brave!

Goodluck - keep us posted on how you get on :)

This is how I used to snag a guy. Ya walk right up to him, grab him by the shirt say" your my boyfriend now" then kiss him so his eyes roll back in his head and he's hypnotized by every word you say for days.

Crankiebabie,

LOL That makes it a lot easier for the guy, especially a really shy one.

Joe

You all have some good answers. I'm a little shy when it comes to asking a guy out. Guys will approach me and ask me out, but regardless of how cute, good looking or rich the guy is, I still wouldn't date them. I've dated guys that are very good looking, but they didn't have the best personality. I prefer normal guys that have a great personally and sense of humor anytime. The guy I'm dating has those qualities, which is good.

Lil miss vixen, try to get to know him more before you ask him out. When you see him around, have a conversation with him about something you know he likes. It can be nerve racking asking somebody out, it's important to be yourself. Then, in your own words and your own style, ask him if he would like to go out sometimes. If does like you, I'm sure he'll say, yes.

thanks guy soo much. your a great help. i've heard the reply "try to get to know him better" many times. he's like a real good friend of mine, and i'm sorry crankiebabie, i'm not quite that bold. lol. i know his phone number. but it's really akward. did i mention. this guy is my ex's best friend? yeah akward. even though me and my ex are like best friends now. and we hang out at eachothers house and all. i'd feel really weird dating my ex's best friend. should i even go for it? my nerves are killing me. the other day me and him were walking toward his house in an open feildand he'd say my names a few times. and i'd say his. like we were both thinking of it.
the other problem i have is, if he says no. do you think i'll loose the friendship with both my ex and my crush? and sicne we have al lthe same classes. i'd be devistated, not being able to talk to him anymore. please help soon.
<3lil miss vixen

Lil miss vixen, I think you should just go for it and ask this boy out. Remember to be yourself because you don't want him to think your superficial. Just relax and be confident when you talk to him. If he says, no, don't let it bother you. Know that there is somebody out there for you, if the boy you like isn't interested. You will meet a lot boys before you find the one that's right for you.

Maybe you should consider talking you're your ex first. Be honest with him and ask him if it would bother him to see you with his best friend. If you're definitely good friends now, you wouldn't want to risk your friendship on a "maybe" relationship with the shy guy.

I also think that you should wait for him to ask you out. Not so much because I'm old fashioned (maybe a little) but more because you need to show guys that you're a nice girl who is worth the effort. There's nothing wrong with making a guy work a little for you, a little sweat never hurt anyone.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by momincali

I also think that you should wait for him to ask you out. Not so much because I'm old fashioned (maybe a little) but more because you need to show guys that you're a nice girl who is worth the effort. There's nothing wrong with making a guy work a little for you, a little sweat never hurt anyone.

---

I agree to a certain degree - but in all fairness - my boyfriend Pete knew I was a nice girl and worth the effort - but he could not bring himself to say anything to me or ask me out because he was fearful I did not feel the same. He is so glad that I spoke up and said something. He is a wonderful guy. Great personality & sense of humour, down to earth and I can totally be myself with him.

I knew all of this before I said anything to him as I had had the opportunity to chat to him on a few occasions in passing and on random nights out. He even came to my 21st birthday which I was really chuffed about. Watching my video back now, I can see that Pete is watching me the whole night and low and behold he was at the very edge of the stage giving me moral support at the point of the night where I sang my song. I was terribly drunk and knew it was not going to sound good at all but he gave me the courage to get up and sing it anyway.

I do agree about asking your ex boyfriends thoughts as it come back to the rule of best friends not dating eachothers ex's. A light bulb has just switched on in my head - maybe that's why this guy is holding back - because you are his best friends ex?? Just a thought.

Come up with some sort of "excuse" to have him come over to your home some evening (with your parents' approval and supervision, of course.) Something like "I've got this hot new movie on video. You really need to come over and watch it with me." Or, "I just found this new recipie for brownies that I'm going to try out and I need a taste-tester." Of course, there's also the old standby "I need help with my homework." Asking him to "help" you out in some way is a good confidence-booster for the shy guy and will be hard for him to refuse, especially if he's as interested in you as you seem to indicate. Good luck!

I got off school today. The 23rd. And. I missed my chance. 100%. I know that he likes me. He told my ex boyfriend so. And I really want to be with this guy. I like him so much. And were really good friends. But now that christmas break has started and I won't seem him for 10 days. Do you think. Maybe he'll forget about me completely and move on? I miss him already.
Thank you guys so much for listening. My friends are getting tired of my sob stories because I've been planning to ask him out for 4 months. :( bad I know.

10 days should be enough time for him to think about you and miss you. Things will go great. You'll see.

Hi I am 14 and have never really had a g/f friend as I am really shy but there was this one girl about 4 years ago at my primary school and we are really good friends and we like connected with each other and one day our two best friends were kissing when they just started going out and she said I have never done that before and I said me neither but rather than continue talking about that I just changed the subject and really wish I hadn't because the next week was the summer holidays and she found someone else and I have never liked anyone from then, but the other day I seen her in mcdonalds and started talking and she has a different b/f now and said that the only reason she didn't ask me was because I changed to the subject and I've got her MSN addy now and was talking too her last night and she has broken up with her b/f and we are going to meet-up next week and I fell so sorry for her but she says she is ready to move on and meet me just for a chat and if it does advance I will definitely say yes because I missed my one and only chance and I can't stop thinking about her when I see other couples so I would say to the original poster if you get the chance I would take it as if it doesn't work out then you can go your separate ways but if it does then good but if you don't you will keep having to see them everyday possibly with someone else and keep remembering them until you get someone else so I would as you don't want to end up like me!