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-   Bereavement (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=48)
-   -   How do I heal? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=153374)

  • Nov 18, 2007, 09:38 AM
    Sooner_gurl
    How do I heal?
    When I was 16 years old I had a baby boy named Charlie. He lived for 3 and 1/2 minutes before he died of severe brain trauma due to a car accident 3 days prior. I am now 21 years old and everyday I think of him and my heart breaks. I don't want to get pregnant again because I don't know if I could live if something went wrong and I lost another child. I don't know how to talk about my son and I don't know how to stop the pain in my heart and in my soul. Can anybody give me advice on this? I need all the help I can. Thank You.
  • Nov 18, 2007, 09:44 AM
    Stratmando
    Sorry about your loss, I would like to think another baby would keep you distracted.
    And help heal. You probably would be a good Mom.
  • Nov 18, 2007, 11:08 AM
    Caralyn
    Sooner_gurl,

    I'm so sorry you had to go through that so young. It's a very delicate subject, don't let anything I say offend you. We have lost a young family member too, and each of us deal with it differently. My daughter collects angels and I collect teddy bears, we have them on a special shelf in memory of her. Grief is one of the processes that lasts the longest. It's a very natural process, and it can't be rushed. But it can be made a little easier if you can think about your baby and smile a little. My belief is that that is how he would like to see you if he could. I know how you feel because I have felt it too. The thing that helped me and my daughter was imagining how our little one would want to see us, and I know she wouldn't want to see us miserable. She would want to see us getting on with our life. I wish you well, I really do. :)
  • Nov 18, 2007, 12:10 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I would suggest getting professional help. One can start "thinking" and never leave their home for fear of this may happen or that may happen, so when we allow our fears to control our lives, we are no longer in control.

    This is an issue that you and your husband need to get counseling for.

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