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-   -   I feel I need to get angry but I can't. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=152899)

  • Nov 16, 2007, 06:18 PM
    Radium
    I feel I need to get angry but I can't.
    So This girl and I broke up, I have been having weird feelings of still trying to cling to something that isn't there. I feel That I need to get angry and pissed, and maybe yell a little bit. For some reason though I won't allow myself to direct the hurt and anger towards the person that caused it. Even if she is not around. I make excuses for her. It has begun to effect my life. I feel like two parts maybe even three are pulling me in all sorts of directions. So I ask How should I go about venting what I need to vent. Crying if I need to. I feel like I have put a wall on my emotions and now it is starting to be a problem. Advice please.
  • Nov 16, 2007, 07:30 PM
    Ladyviper
    Maybe you don't need to get angry, maybe you just feel it is the normal thing to do. Maybe you feel you have to do it, because people expect that from anyone in your situation. If you don't feel comfortable getting angry then don't, but don't bottle it all up either!

    If you still have feeling for her, you may continue to stick up for her and make excuses for her for a long time. That is fine, just don't lie to yourself or idealize her. You obviously have something to get off your chest, or you wouldn't feel you are being pulled in different directions. Perhaps you should try journaling if you don't feel there is anyone you can talk to that will offer and unbiased ear. If it is a new break-up, things will get better with time, if they don't you may need to talk to a professional.
  • Nov 16, 2007, 07:38 PM
    e419
    The worst thing you can do (take it from me) is put a wall up, your frustration and anger will just keep building and building until you explode on someone one day over nothing. One thing I found that helps is to do something physical. Run, lift, punch a punching bag, but put your emotions into it. Let them come out in whatever it is your doing. Another thing I found that helps is music. I play guitar so it helps when I'm in a mood to just sit off by myself and play. One more thing you could try is writing poetry or just write in a journal (not the most appealing thing to some people) but poetry by far is the best thing I've ever found to get out my feelings. You don't have to write about specific name, people, places, or anything. On a peace of paper just write out all your feelings, or anything that comes to mind. You can get a lot of relief (or at least I know I do) from that.
  • Nov 16, 2007, 07:54 PM
    T-A-T11
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Radium
    So This girl and i broke up, I have been having weird feelings of still trying to cling to something that isn't there. I feel That I need to get angry and pissed, and maybe yell a little bit. For some reason though i wont allow my self to direct the hurt and anger towards the person that caused it. Even if she is not around. I make excuses for her. It has begun to effect my life. I feel like two parts maybe even three are pulling me in all sorts of directions. So i ask How should i go about venting what i need to vent. Crying if i need to. I feel like i have put a wall on my emotions and now it is starting to be a problem. Advice please.

    You are in love and you can't hurt or get mad at her because you really care about her and you need 2 understand that things happen for a reason and there is nothing you can do about it and mabey you could still be friends and talk about why you guys broke up that may help calm your nerves
  • Nov 16, 2007, 08:13 PM
    Ash123
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Radium
    So This girl and i broke up, I have been having weird feelings of still trying to cling to something that isn't there. I feel That I need to get angry and pissed, and maybe yell a little bit. For some reason though i wont allow my self to direct the hurt and anger towards the person that caused it. Even if she is not around. I make excuses for her. It has begun to effect my life. I feel like two parts maybe even three are pulling me in all sorts of directions. So i ask How should i go about venting what i need to vent. Crying if i need to. I feel like i have put a wall on my emotions and now it is starting to be a problem. Advice please.

    How long have you been broken up?

    See my guide below:
  • Nov 18, 2007, 07:06 PM
    Radium
    Comment on Ladyviper's post
    YEs I try to keep getting on but I find myself losing my drive more and more each day.
  • Nov 18, 2007, 07:17 PM
    Radium
    Comment on Ash123's post
    Thank you for the Guide. It sucks I know I am trying my best I just feel my Drive to do anything Slipping Less and less Everyday.
  • Nov 18, 2007, 07:35 PM
    Ash123
    Again, how long have you been broken up?
  • Nov 19, 2007, 05:38 AM
    Radium
    Comment on e419's post
    I know the wall is bad, But I can't figure things out. I don't know why
  • Nov 19, 2007, 05:38 AM
    Radium
    Comment on T-A-T11's post
    Yes it is true I love her bery much and feel unappreciated for all I did. It eats at me.
  • Nov 19, 2007, 05:40 AM
    Radium
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Ash123
    Again, how long have you been broken up?

    It has been a few months, but we have had run ins that led to me thinking otherwise. Now she has a new boyfriend but I can't stop thinking about the things she said only a month ago to me. So I am not sure what to do.
  • Nov 19, 2007, 09:15 AM
    Ash123
    only one thing to do: 100% No Contact.

    ZERO other options....


    If you let go you will have more control of you and her.

    TRUST ME... this must be done for 90 days. No exceptions. If you have a weak moment log on here for support.

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