should I let my boyfriend go to a stripclub?
I am in a really sticky situation. I have been with my boyfrind for 6months, we have a pretty good relationship, we are quite open with each other. My boyfriend lives in a shared house with some guys. Tonight they were planning to go play poker at a strip club which I was extremely uncomfortable with. I trust my partner, buuut, you know it just feel wrong.
Him going to a strip club makes me feel degraded. And then I think well when you feel like having a "dirty" (cheeky) night then just go to strippers. It's like, well you have gone there before to access that pleasure, then go again. It feels like by him going to a strip club he is allowing someone else impede on our relationship. Next he'll be asking to go to a prostitute when he feels like he's getting bored with me. Nooooo. That's me getting too emotional.
I feel really cheapened by the idea of him going to a strippers. I love my boyfriend heaps, and I know he really loves me, but I feel really cheapened and betrayed by the idea of him going to a strippers. He asked me why it was any different to him looking at porn and I feel that the interaction and feelings/dirty thoughts and temptations that would be brought on by a stripper, stripping in a sexual manner in front of him, to be disrespectful to me and our relationship.
I fear being a girl that is too controlling of my partner. I know I am lucky because his housemates tried convincing him to go with them and lie to me that he didn't go. He didn't listen to them, I know I am lucky. I just don't know whether to listen to my values that are telling me that this is completely wrong, or to one part of my heart that is reminding me of how much he loves me and wouldn't che at on me, but then another part says but what if he does enjoy it at a particular sexual level9psychologically) and then he starts having dirty thoughts and a desire to be sexually active with one of them. :confused: Which voice in my head do I listen to. My head is a mess, please help me.