When you go through a lot for almost 2 yrs straight is it only human or normal to be angry?
Like bad live in relationship got beat court etc.. Lost two people in family my 15 newphen and then my dad.. my illness which is rare.. adding I developed hyperthyriodism multi toxic nodular from my main ill LCh.. ex junked my car.. no money to fix it.. ive been inside my apt. for 4 moths and only been out 7 times. I have no transportation.. getting sicker no friends and no family.
So is it normal to be very angry often?:confused:

If you are angry, chances are it's because you are feeling sorry for yourself. Get out and live life. If you have no friends, it's because you are never leaving your apartment. Post a friend ad on Craig's List in your area. Go to the mall and meet new people... There's public transportation. Your ex sucks at life. Hope you feel better. Everyone goes through bad time now and then. You just have to pick yourself up and hold your chin high, and live on.

I am so sorry you have been through so much in such a short time.

It does sound as though you may be suffering from depression as it has lasted so long (more than 6 months is the official time frame for some depression disorders). People telling you to simply "get out and live life" have never neither experienced depression nor known someone who suffers from this debilitating disorder.

Therapy is in order for you. You need to TALK about what has happened in your life and learn alternative ways of acceptance. It is possible that you may need medication, and that may just be short term while you sort this all out.

I was simply suggesting that she help herself before she seeks help from others... Healing sometimes comes from within. I actually suffered from depression in my late teen years due to a miscarriage. So, my words are not just thrown out there. And nothing I said was meant to be rude or hateful... You obviously misunderstood my answer to her question.

What you posted above is not possible for some people. As a matter of fact, people who suffer from severe clinical depression can take that as a slap in the face.

All of the people I have worked with that have suffered depression actually HATE it when people tell them to "just cheer up," "go out and get a life," etc.

What you suffered was called situational depression, this is MUCH different than what I read in the OP. For situational depression your advice is so-so and can be possible. But this person has been in the house for 4 months, this is indicative of possible clinical depression.

uhmm.. see.. I am ill. I am sick already I've gotten sicker I have a disease called LCH. Very rare. I'm bed ridding a lot now.. I can't walk to my bus route.. I wish I could cuase I would. I have no family.. which mean no support. Everything I mentioned has happened to me over almost 2 yrs span.. excpet my LCH.. the new thing w/that is I've become sicker and gotten the hyperthyoid MTN w/it. My "independece" is I feel like its been taken away. You I have no car.. I can't never afford another and even to fix the broken one.. that car mean a lot to me. It was my freedom in away where in ill. He.. the x destroyed it.. I would love to move on.. love it love.. but I have no sources. U know things people do everyday.. like get up shower eat dress wash dishes.. clean house I want those things back! I want to go put gas in my car.. I am willing to help myself.. I am just in a situation to where this time I need a helping hand u know? I really don't have family.. just my mom who isn't an "emotional type" she also takes care of my grandmother everyday.. soo.. idk. I'm lost I'm scared.. I never in my worst nightmares thougt my life at barely in my 30th yr would be like this. Also I would like to sate that my x what he did.. you don't have to be stupid for it to happen.. ive realised that it can happen to anyone. But while it does and after the last straws no ones believes you.. even when your screaming out for help.. or walking around w/ brusies.. no body believes.. somehow its your fault.. ive read that disabled people or people who sometimes need other ppls help get abused in a different way something like the care taker thinks they own them. Where my illness is very rare, there's little to no support nor treatment. And you'd have to have $$$ to travel for "seeif this works" treatment. And doing all this alone... and I've gone thro this all alone ex deaths my family gone myself gone my car gone... everythings gone.. I just wanted to clean my apt. take care of me and move on,but I can't seem to what happened still effects me and how I live. I ve been want therphy.. but I have medical card.. which I'm grateful for that.. but you can only go to one place for therphay.. and that's a state type place where u only have 15 minutes w/ aso called dr. and the rest is paper work and they put you on tons of meds that you don't need.. I want to go somewhere where I can just talk to someone. And they will listen... maybe so I won't feel like I'm crazy.. cause I'm not crazy.ive been thro my own hell and I want to talk about it and have someone tell me something other than how it makes them feel. Thanks to all who replied. As always just me.. I think anyway.. I feel I'm losing myself.. I miss life.. u know washing dishes driving to the store.. lil things.

I'm sorry for the typos. My hands don't work too well.
You guys must think that there has to be a way.. I think that.. I mean I have a dr. but my illnes so rare and my mom she don't uhmmm I don't know how to explain her. When the dective was here after last starw w/ ex she sat in my living shaking her head when the detective said he needs to go to jail.. she kept saying "poor insert name he can't go to jail." and I'm bruised crying my apt toren up glass every where blood.. she washed the blood up out of carpet when I asked her not too because that's evidence he took pictures. She betrayed me. She even let him come to her house and talked to him w/out me knowing and lied to me.. and I found out it took her along time for her to admit it.. but she never has really told me all of it.. I just know. I feel betrayed by her. It hurts. So many things has happened in a domino effect.. thank you all for hearing me out once again.

Justme,
It's very normal to feel frustrated, sad and angry in your situation. You've gone through a lot in the recent past, which could quite lead to situational depression, and you've also mentioned that you have hyperthyroisidm, which can also cause depression (among other things). On top of this, you've been seriously ill which has reduced your ability to go out or participate in normal day to day activities. Of course you're not feeling amazing at the moment.
There are things you can do about this, but I think that the most important one is to find someone to talk to. If your relationship with your mom weren't so strained recently I'd suggest her.
There are surely other people you could seek out. If not, there are support groups for illness and mental illness in a lot of places, or you could see a counsellor and ask for advice.
I realise that it's difficult with you being so ill, but it would probably help a lot to find some friends and people to interact with to allow you some more relaxation time. Even a hobby of any kind might help you to find times of peace.
I know this will be difficult. But take care of yourself and don't try to hold all of this to yourself. Seek help wherever you can and never be afraid to ask for it.
If you need someone to talk to, send me a message.
We're all here for you. I hope everything turns out OK.

Kal

HI, I have just come across your thread and want to post a little.

What I have read is depression keeping your mind from looking for help,excuses for 'WHY NOT' rather than 'I CAN',typical depression, and results from isolation,and avoidance from family etc...

After 12 years of resentment toward my family(because they just didn't understand me and my problems) I came to understand a few things(after a lot of therapy and proper medications)

The question was"Did I have a problem or did THEY have a problem?"

Answer was a little of both,both answers pointed to ME.

My perception of the world was, IT was tweaked, my views were right-on, the rest of the world was off and badly in need of re-alignment.

After many sessions with professionals and a few in house treatments, I began to see things in a different light.

Then began the hard stuff.

To face all those I thought were tweaked and express my concern which I felt responsible for my actions/accusations.

The family, and friends I still could talk to, were ALL understanding and forgiving(much to my relief), It didn't make me 'not responsible' for my actions/words, just not responsible for why I did them, My chemical imbalance made me see things in a different light than the rest of the world.Family and support from peers/friends with smiler problems are essential for a healthy mentality.

Why do I write this for you? Well I am hoping you can start seeing things in a new perspective, namely, you are not alone, we are here on line, some a lot more than you might think... lol( I have some really good friends in this site alone,and I have only been here for a few months)(J_9 being in that list of friends/supporters):)

If you are in the city/suburbs, a call to the mental health clinic close to you will get the ball rolling for help,How much does that phone weigh?(looks like a million pounds till you actually do something, I know, have been there too)

PLEASE,we can only help from in here, only you can do for yourself,call for assistance,get that car fixed,find a way to LIVE again,and let us know,good or bad, if any of this is helping.

There are a lot of people who read these posts,never to address YOUR problem, but read for help for themselves.


I hope your feeling better about us and yourself and continue writing on AMHD.

Ken

justme77,

I feel quite concerned, and I'm so sorry to hear how tough things are. Do you have a health care worker calling in? Surely you are not entirely on your own with all that going on? I understand ChihuahuaMomma's awkward attempt at encouraging you to do something to improve your situation. I have been guilty of miss reading how dire the situation is and my words of encouragement fell short. I wish I had more to offer you. I would like to say this though, as tough as the situation is, to avoid making things even tougher, be good to yourself, do what you can do to surround yourself with some comfort. You have every right to feel angry and frustrated, but you don't need to let this anger bring you more down than you already are. I understand that you can't do much but you can make what you can do count. Fix up the place where you choose to sit and relax the most, arrange some of your favourite things around you. Look out for yourself the very best way you can. Some days will have you feeling a little better than others, these are the days to take the best care of you and your surroundings. I'm sending peach coloured warm healing to you. Stick around here, we would love to hear how you are feeling. :)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by KBC

HI, I have just come across your thread and want to post a little.

What I have read is depression keeping your mind from looking for help,excuses for 'WHY NOT' rather than 'I CAN',typical depression, and results from isolation,and avoidance from family etc...

After 12 years of resentment toward my family(because they just didn't understand me and my problems) I came to understand a few things(after a lot of therapy and proper medications)

The question was"Did I have a problem or did THEY have a problem?"

Answer was a little of both,both answers pointed to ME.

My perception of the world was, IT was tweaked, my views were right-on, the rest of the world was off and badly in need of re-alignment.

After many sessions with professionals and a few in house treatments, I began to see things in a different light.

Then began the hard stuff.

To face all those I thought were tweaked and express my concern which I felt responsible for my actions/accusations.

The family, and friends I still could talk to, were ALL understanding and forgiving(much to my relief), It didn't make me 'not responsible' for my actions/words, just not responsible for why I did them, My chemical imbalance made me see things in a different light than the rest of the world.Family and support from peers/friends with smiler problems are essential for a healthy mentality.

Why do I write this for you? Well I am hoping you can start seeing things in a new perspective, namely, you are not alone, we are here on line, some a lot more than you might think...lol( I have some really good friends in this site alone,and I have only been here for a few months)(J_9 being in that list of friends/supporters):)

If you are in the city/suburbs, a call to the mental health clinic close to you will get the ball rolling for help,How much does that phone weigh?(looks like a million pounds till you actually do something, I know, have been there too)

PLEASE,we can only help from in here, only you can do for yourself,call for assistance,get that car fixed,find a way to LIVE again,and let us know,good or bad, if any of this is helping.

There are a lot of people who read these posts,never to address YOUR problem, but read for help for themselves.


I hope your feeling better about us and yourself and continue writing on AMHD.

Ken

---

thank you however the how its not me its you Isn't true I tried I try to blance.. be fair.. what ever it takes to fix things I know I'm not perfect.. I admit when I'm wrong I am willing g.. Thank you for replying.. but I meet people half way when I can.. I don't blame people for my illness and heck yes I do blame my bas**^d of an ex for destroying my car! Thank you I really thank you for your opinion. I just want you to know I am willing there's just not many options. That's why I'm here. Thanks

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Caralyn

justme77,

I feel quite concerned, and I'm so sorry to hear how tough things are. Do you have a health care worker calling in? Surely you are not entirely on your own with all that going on? I understand ChihuahuaMomma's awkward attempt at encouraging you to do something to improve your situation. I have been guilty of miss reading how dire the situation is and my words of encouragement fell short. I wish I had more to offer you. I would like to say this though, as tough as the situation is, to avoid making things even tougher, be good to yourself, do what you can do to surround yourself with some comfort. You have every right to feel angry and frustrated, but you don't need to let this anger bring you more down than you already are. I understand that you can't do much but you can make what you can do count. Fix up the place where you choose to sit and relax the most, arrange some of your favourite things around you. Look out for yourself the very best way you can. Some days will have you feeling a little better than others, these are the days to take the best care of you and your surroundings. I'm sending peach coloured warm healing to you. Stick around here, we would love to hear how you are feeling. :)

---

Thank you.. see that's what I want.. I want to just be about me (not selfish ) just cleasne myself grieve accept go on.. take long baths little things.. but I am.. its so.. u know all this is like a job. A really bad one. I want to thank you for your reply though thanks*

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by KalFour

Justme,
It's very normal to feel frustrated, sad and angry in your situation. You've gone through a lot in the recent past, which could quite lead to situational depression, and you've also mentioned that you have hyperthyroisidm, which can also cause depression (among other things). On top of this, you've been seriously ill which has reduced your ability to go out or participate in normal day to day activities. Of course you're not feeling amazing at the moment.
There are things you can do about this, but I think that the most important one is to find someone to talk to. If your relationship with your mom weren't so strained recently I'd suggest her.
There are surely other people you could seek out. If not, there are support groups for illness and mental illness in a lot of places, or you could see a counsellor and ask for advice.
I realise that it's difficult with you being so ill, but it would probably help a lot to find some friends and people to interact with to allow you some more relaxation time. Even a hobby of any kind might help you to find times of peace.
I know this will be difficult. But take care of yourself and don't try to hold all of this to yourself. Seek help wherever you can and never be afraid to ask for it.
If you need someone to talk to, send me a message.
We're all here for you. I hope everything turns out ok.

Kal

---

Thank you very much I really try.. my moms does try when she can. Or something like that.. I am feeling like a whiney brat for being on here saying this.. or maybe I've been told that 2 many times.. im 30.. im sorry.. im ranting.. thank you for your words.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by justme77

Thank you very much i really try.. my moms does try when she can. or something like that..i am feeling like a whiney brat for being on here saying this..or maybe ive been told that 2 many times..im 30..im sorry..im ranting..thank you for your words.

---

You're not being a "whiney brat". There's certainly nothing wrong with asking for help, especially for someone who's feeling so lost and alone.
Just hang in there, keep trying and take care of yourself.

Kal

KBC is right you have to readjust your perspective. Are you wrong or are others wrong?
Like KBC said a little of both BUT there isn't much you can do to readjust the way others act, think or treat you.
Caralyn is right you have to look out for number one since nobody is attempting to help your situation.
Try to find harmony within yourself.
Make the best of things and find it in yourself to forgive others. Bitterness only brings your mood down more.
Try listening to uplifting music and use your time to read up on things of interest to you
On the internet. Read uplifting things and things that help you get in touch with your inner self.

It use to bother me that I had to struggle in life and nobody was their to help me through but I started converting my hurt to my advantage and started studying many things that
Made me stronger. I also started realizing that as bad as I had it the people that seemed to have it all together really weren't as blessed as me in the long run. I asked myself would I rather have their life? Or their life? And the answer was always no even though they had a good husband, a house, made $60,000. A year. I saw they either were struggling for more money because they didn't handle it well, or their marriage wasn't what it appeared to be, or they were miserable with who they were, etc...
Many people are shallow and empty and living for material things and miss out on things like the blessings that come through helping others.

I raised four kids on my own on less than 15 thousand a year and I have four beautiful kids to be proud of.
SO I think it can be all about the struggle and the outcome and you know YOU learned how to handle it in the long run.

Even though I struggled to survive I know at the same time I was blessed and learned how to go from there.

They say somebody always has it worse than you which can feel so untrue at times but
At the same time those somebodies can be an inspiration to keep on keeping on
One of my favorite inspiring people is

Joni Erackson Tada always inspires me
Living The American Dream: Joni Eareckson Tada, Founder of Joni & Friends at StartUpPrincess.com

Quote:

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Originally Posted by justme77

when you go through alot for almost 2 yrs straight is it only human or normal to be angry?
like bad live in relationship got beat court etc.. lost two ppl in family my 15 newphen and then my dad..my illness which is rare..adding i developed hyperthyriodism multi toxic nodular from my main ill LCh..ex junked my car.. no money to fix it..ive been inside my apt. for 4 moths and only been out 7 times. i have no transportation..getting sicker no friends and no family.
So is it normal to be very angry often?:confused:

---

Hey everyone... nothing has gotten better. Everything that everyone has suggested I want to do. I am so alone.

Is there a local mental health facility in your area? One time, I had to take my mom to a mental health place and she didn't have any money/insurance. I looked in the yellow pages and began calling around to see what they charged... I found one that was free! She went in and of course she had to go through all the evaluations and such, but they set her up for some counseling, one-on-one, with a psychiatrist and they also offered group counseling. There are also other agencies and organizations, some specifically for women, which offer counseling sessions for free. Research and make phone calls! I think you could definitely benefit from talking with someone.

I am so sorry you are going through all of this. People are stronger than they realize. You are strong, and you can make it! I know it's a lot easier said than done, and I can't imagine what you're going through, but I will definitely keep you in my prayers. Let us know how things are going periodically.

Good luck to you and I wish you the best!

This is the mental facilities newest posting where I go for assistance.

Side 1... Side 2
I can………………………………………………………………….…….….. I can't
I will………………………………………………………………….. …….….I'll try
I want to…………………………………………………………….……….. I have to
Will do……………………………………………………………….…... Should have
My goal……………………………………………………………………... Could have
Today……………………………………………………………………... ….Someday
Next time………………………………………………………………….. ….. If only
I understand………………………………………………………………….Yes, but
Opportunity………………………………………………………………….. Problem
Challenging…………………………………………………………………... difficult
Motivated……………………………………………………………………... stressed
Interested……………………………………………………………………... worried
Possible…………………………………………………………………... …impossible
You, your, we, our………………………………………………………….. I, me, my
Love……………………………………………………………………………... …Hate
.
Do you list from side 1 or side 2?

By listening(reading) to your posts, it is all too clear how depressed you are, and in my opinion, you really need to seek mental help, even if they 'medicate you'

How long do you want to suffer is on your shoulders, we are trying to help, but you seem to do little for yourself.How many stories( other than your niece) have you TRULY heard about the mental health care facility that 'overmedicates'( I am willing to bet not too many)

We tend to hear the bad stories, not the good ones, they don't have anything to complain about, now do they?Besides, I believe the response from you is based on depression( making you think negatively) so ANY advice given(weather good or mediocre) will be spurned until you make your own future.

I wish you the best, I hope you try to seek help( we can't do much more from our desks), and I would love to see you recover from this episode in your life.

Ken