My husband and his ex-wife divorced in 1999. Her lawyer was supposed to file a QDRO (something to do with distribution of his retirement when he retires) with the courts but never did. Nothing was filed with his employer either. In 2004 he resigned his employment after 26 years. To avoid the comments on that let me just say that he had been on unpaid medical leave for over a year as well as another personal emergency that necessitated the resignation.

When he resigned, he was give a refund of what he paid into the retirement account. He did NOT retire, he did NOT receive any retirement benefits. His ex took him to court. We got served with the papers the day before the court hearing and we had moved out of state so there was NO way we could get to the court for the hearing. We called them about it but the court was not interested in what we had to say. So, as you can imagine, the courts favored her and he was ordered to pay her a little over half of what he actually got.

I did some research and the type of QDRO they had, one of the drawbacks to that one was that he could end his employment by whatever means BEFORE retirement. That is exactly what happened, and let me say it was NOT done in an attempt to keep from paying her anything.

We tried to get a lawyer for a separate issue but there are no lawyers in our state willing to take a case involved in another state without a huge retainer (which we can't afford) and the lawyers in that state wouldn't deal with us because we were not residents. We can't afford a lawyer and because we are not residents there, we don't qualify for legal aid and legal aid here won't touch it either.

Is there any advice on how we can get this taken care of? They now have a bench warrant for my husband's arrest if we ever show back up in IL. Personally, I see that as a move to make sure he never comes back there to see their children and grandchildren. She has been quite proprietary regarding them.

Thanks for any advice!