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-   -   Age difference (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=151062)

  • Nov 12, 2007, 12:35 AM
    Lief_of_Del
    Age difference
    M 17 and a girl that I like and likes me back is 13. We have know each other a long time now and want to go out, but we don't know if it is illegal or not. Her parents are fine with us dating and are actually happy about it. We aren't going to have sex. The most we will do is kiss. Is there anything illegal about this that I should be worried about? I've been told that it is considered gross sexual imposition, but I know nothing about that. I'm from Arizona in case that helps and we have a different law. We've tried waiting till she gets older but we only lasted 6 months and it hurts too much to wait any longer, but we don't know if there are any legal issues I should worry about and my mom doesn't want me dating her. I don't really know what to do anymore
  • Nov 12, 2007, 02:05 AM
    charlotte234s
    If the age of consent where you live is 14, 15, 16, or 17, then yes, it is illegal to touch a child (Which she, no doubt, legally is at 13) in any way, including romantic kissing and things like that.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 02:42 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    Then I'm not allowed to kiss her? I'm not eighteen right now so does that still apply or only when I turn eighteen? And what about when she turns fourteen
  • Nov 13, 2007, 09:20 PM
    charlotte234s
    Then I'm not allowed to kiss her? I'm not eighteen right now so does that still apply or only when I turn eighteen? And what about when she turns fourteen


    No, not romantically or anything like that, that would be considered gross sexual imposition or sexual assault or something like that.. and you won't be able to until she reaches the age of consent, which in my state is 16, the state I grew up in it was 17, but in Arizona is is 18.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 09:31 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I would say that it is wrong, first a 13 year old child has no business with a 17 year old, and any respectable parent would put a end to it before it started.

    And let me see 17 and 13 this year is 18 and 14 and then 19 and 15,
    So sooner or latter, the boy will end up doing illegal sexual activiy and chnce being a registered sex offender the rest of his life. Example is the boy who just got out of jail in GA with a 10 year sentence for having sex with his under age girlfriend.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:03 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    What do you mean by romantically
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:05 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Any sexual touching could be considered child abuse at this point for a 13 year old child.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:08 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Including kising?
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:09 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    Whoops wrong spot, anyway does that include kissing
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:11 PM
    charlotte234s
    Yes, including kissing I believe. If a 90 year old man starting making out with a 13 year old, it'd be the same deal as a 17 year old making out with a 13 year old.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:16 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    Are you sure its illegal
    So far in the sexual conduct thing it just says sex in anyway or something like that
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:24 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    At 13 you get into the entire child abuse, heck in GA it is illegal to actually curse in front of minor children.

    But yes at 13 there are many ways to attack what is illegal beyond the pure sex issue. If you were 14 or 15 it would be different than 17 even.
    Move on and find a girl that will not end you up in jail.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:27 PM
    charlotte234s
    It would be like an adult kissing a little kid romantically from a legal standpoint, so I think yes, it's illegal.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:35 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    What's the difference from romantic kissing and just kissing?
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:37 PM
    charlotte234s
    If a parent or relative kisses a child on the forehead or maybe the hand, it's not considered wrong or illegal, but if it's a minor child and their much older boyfriend, any kind of kissing basically is romantic kissing and I think it's illegal.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:44 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    Did you find any proof, I really want to know cause me and her have been trying to wait and figure this out for a long time now
  • Nov 13, 2007, 10:59 PM
    charlotte234s
    Most things I've read consider a legal adult kissing with a minor to be sexual contact, which is illegal, and the adult can be charged with child molestation/related things.. Also, even if the parents approve now, they may change their mind at any time and press charges.

    Also, kissing usually leads to other things, and touching a minor girl sexually at all... (breasts, genitals, inner leg, anything considered "sexual") 0r exposing yourself to them, or anything else sexual will land you right in jail.

    I'd suggest finding someone your own age to date. A 13 year old is not capable of understanding romantic love anyway and having a really meaningful adult relationship. I'm not trying to be mean, but this could get you in trouble, and it's not smart, and I feel it's just gross.
  • Nov 13, 2007, 11:47 PM
    Lief_of_Del
    I know I have to be careful. We are telling the parents everything and keeping no secrets. I'm not going to do anything like that to her because she is so young, even if she says she is ready. I know you think its wrong but that has nothing to do with this subject. I know this is a dangerous situation that's why I'm keeping it real safe and being cautious. I'm not even going to kiss her till she's at least 14. But what we want to know if it is illegal for us to kiss. We don't want to go through anymore of this confusion and being scared and worried. We've waited six months now and want to learn everything ahead of time before starting. You still didn't really show any proof on the kissing thing. Where did you find the information?
  • Nov 13, 2007, 11:50 PM
    charlotte234s
    I think even if you were just kissing it'd be illegal and would be considered sexual contact with a minor from what I've read.
  • Nov 14, 2007, 10:34 AM
    dataguneed
    In New York I believe it is 15or 16 to be involved with basically an adult it is degrading for you to be in a relationship with a 13 year old you're probably looking at it only being 4 yrs older than her but when you reach 18 you need to stop matter of fact stop while your ahead and wait till she becomes a adult

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