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-   -   My ex wants to remain friends just after the breakup (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=147099)

  • Oct 31, 2007, 11:57 AM
    corporate
    My ex wants to remain friends just after the breakup
    Hello

    I have just a met a guy who lives in my native country the other continent ;(, he was on a business trip and we have spent one week together. After he left, we kept emailing every couple of days, I went one week to visit my family and friends one month after, it was already scheduled before meeting him, he knew it. THen I have spent all my late evenings at his home and even the entire weekend. I have changed my return ticket for him. I was supposed to stay at a friend's place during the week, but the first night we have seen each other he gave me one spare key. Every morning, I could have slept longer at his home he was going to work.
    We had a great week and especially the weekend was magical. When I left, we kept emailing and two weeks after I have sent an email asking if he wanted to go further and see me again... he replied that he did not want to invest in the relationship because he just ended a long relationship also that is pretty hard to have a long distance relationship with me even if he said he has feelings for me. I have replied to him then it is better to stop and write sometimes each other. He agrees and wants to remain friends but after few days he kept emailing like a friend but I feel like he should not write to me so early. I feel very surprised that he wrote to me few days after our mutual break up... I don't think he really wants to stop the relationship and I think he has feelings. It is really hard for me I can't stop thinking of him even if I want to stay with him friend. I really care about him ! I don't know what to think? Do you think he has more than a friendship feeling?
    Thank you so much for your help!
  • Oct 31, 2007, 12:24 PM
    peggyhill
    Well, it sounds like he does like you. I can understand he doesn't want to fall in love with someone he won't get to see very often. Also, if he says he needs time because of a recent breakup, it's probably a good idea. I would definitely remain friends with him, maybe someday you will live in the same area and will be able to pick things back up. He probably emailed you right away because he does like you. If circumstances prevent a relationship right now, and being friends is the only thing possible, by all means be friends with him. Also, maybe he emailed you right away because he wanted you to know he did like you very much. He might have been worried that you would think he didn't like you because of what he said about the past relationship. It sounds like he wants you to know he cares about you and everything is OK. I hope it works out so you can be together- he sounds nice. Hope this helps!
  • Oct 31, 2007, 12:27 PM
    N0help4u
    He probably does but doesn't want to 'feel' tied down to a long distant relationship.
    He most likely wants to keep his options open --an on going friendship with you but
    Free to have a girlfriend IF he happens to meet somebody else. That way he doesn't have to feel obligated to you and have to 'break up' with you if he does find somebody but if he doesn't he has you to deepen a relationship.
    My guess is that is what he is probably thinking.
    I agree with Peggy too.

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