Ok, so here's the deal... I like this guy a lot, like... a lot!! And I don't know what to do about it because I have come across multiple problems thus far. We have not dated we are just friends right now, but I'll tell you of the problems if we were to date, "is he to old?" he is old enough to be my dad... I'm 20 and much more mature than most of people my own age, because of things that happened to me when I was younger I grew up way to fast. But anyway this guy is old enough to be my dad, in fact his son is only 3 years younger than I am... but when we are together it just kind of... feels right, though we are just friends.
Is he really to old?
He's 37...
Another problem is that we have different religious beliefs and habits than me. I have a religion that I believe I but I'm not active in the church. But I still believe in it. I'm not sure what his status is on religio but he's a partyer, he drinks, has piercings, and tatoos, which does not bother me at all... but my concern is does he think it bothers me? I can't just tell him it doesn't because he doesn't even know I like him... which leads me to the third problem.
He is my aunts husbands brother. Is that weird? We are kind of related by marriage but not lood. Personally I don't think it's weird... but I want to hear others opinions as well... HELP!
I really like him and can't stop thinking about him... and I don't even know how to tell him without feeling like a complete idiot.I'm worried he just sees me as this little girl that I'm not. Help

Personally I would find that kind of weird, you are soooooo young!! What are you planning to do with the rest of your life. Kids? MArriage? It just seems to me that you are only comfortable and not really looking too much into your real future. Many relationships I have seen like this usually turn bad. What does his son think of all this. Don't make it an uncomfortable situation for the son either, it might be just as hard for him. I remember when my father age 49 dated a 21 year old (same age as my older sister) at the time it was horrible and the relationship did not end up well

You are letting your hormones get the best of you. First, if you say you have a religion? Then maybe it is time to talk to some one in your faith about the dating, sex, marriage thing. Lets put it bluntly, the only reason this "older" guy is dating you is that he figures you are willing to give it up to him. This is a disaster waiting to happen. Dump him, and get on with your life, maybe without a men for a while until you can get your head together.

I think age shouldn't matter when you are over 18 if two people are in love. But in your case you say he doesn't even know you like him. You can't just put yourself out there. You should go out and date other younger guys. It might just be a little crush and might go away if you put your mind on other things.

Like 450donn said, talk to the leader of your church. Ask for advice.

Good Luck :)

I agree with Lotz_of_questions. Though I do believe 2 people with a big age gap can fall in love, this could just be a crush. You are still young, don't rush into anything. Stay friends and see how it goes.
In my opinion, with him having a son and you being somewhat related, this could definitely turn out weird. Maybe you are just attracted to him because guys your age don't show that kind of maturity.
I'd suggest not acting on it just yet. Give it some time. I think with time you will realise yourself whether its wise. The answer is right there within you.

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Originally Posted by winnie19

Ok, so heres the deal... I like this guy alot, like... alot!!! and I dont know what to do about it because i have come across multiple problems thus far. we have not dated we are just friends right now, but i'll tell you of the problems if we were to date, "is he to old?" he is old enough to be my dad... i'm 20 and much more mature than most of people my own age, because of things that happened to me when I was younger i grew up way to fast. but anyways this guy is old enough to be my dad, in fact his son is only 3 years younger than I am... but when we are together it just kinda... feels right, though we are just friends.
is he really to old??
he's 37...
another problem is that we have different religious beliefs and habits than me. I have a religion that I believe i but i'm not active in the church. but I still believe in it. i'm not sure what his status is on religio but he's a partyer, he drinks, has piercings, and tatoos, which does not bother me at all... but my concern is does he think it bothers me?? I can't just tell him it doesn't because he doesn't even know I like him... which leads me to the third problem.
He is my aunts husbands brother. is that weird? we are kinda related by marriage but not lood. personally i dont think it's weird... but i wanna hear others opinions as well.... HELP!
I really like him and can't stop thinking about him... and I dont even know how to tell him without feeling like a complete idiot.i'm worried he just sees me as this little girl that i'm not. help

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Hey winnie19 well that same thing happened to me I liked this guy that was 8 years older then me but I didn't care so I think you should tell him that you like him and see what he says. I know there is quite a big age difference but I think age shouldn t matter. If you guys are kind of related it is OK because a lot of people get married with their cousins.So go ahead take a chance.

Tell me if anything happens OK

Sounds to me like you are just seeking the unattainable. Probably it's just a crush. At his age he probably wouldn't be interested in you anyway, unless he is VERY immature, or needs an ego boost. If you were a bit older, then I'd say go for it. However, realistically speaking you should probably have more experiences with guys closer in age to you first.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think the age difference would make a huge difference. However, with everything else you have written I think that although you may have grown up too fast that you still have a lot to experience and things to learn first.

Other considerations... How would his son take to this? It is statistically proven that for the best chances for a relationship to succeed that both parties should have similar backgrounds, values, religious beliefs. (Not to say there aren't exceptions!) You guys have a lot going against you. Then you have to wonder how other family members will deal with it.

Sometimes it's so much easier when you share as many of those things as possible. Relationships take a lot of work and each little extra thing that requires extra work can wear on a relationship and cause problems that can destroy it.

Honestly, it really sounds like you have a good old-fashioned crush on him. I guess you need to think about how it would affect everyone before taking any steps. Otherwise you may get hurt and cause hurt. If you are in doubt, then don't! Try to focus elsewhere.

Best of luck...

Hugs, Didi