I'm new to this site so I really don't know where to start... I'm a 15 year old boy, I have been dating my girlfriend for 7months and 22days now. She is my first girlfriend as I'm her third boyfriend. I spoil her a lot, I'm the only boyfriend who has been approved by her family members. I love her very much and I would give the world up just to be with her as I have put up with a lot of crap that I didn't need just from her family members alone(An example was I had to bus to her house at 9pm, she lives about a 45minute bus ride away and had to bus home around 1am in the morning because her parents wanted to have a "talk" about our relationship). We broke up once before, about 3 months into the relationship. When we first broke up it was because of the constant pain of her being a big flirt behind my back(I found out she was a big flirt around 2 months in the relationship as she promised to stop), shortly afew days after the breakup I realised I love her and I wanted her back. As it took me a month to get her back, during the breakup I skipped afew classes to visit her(as she went to a different school), called her a lot, and we were constantly contacting each other. Right when I gave up she asked me for a second chance. Ever since then we have been very happy and there have been afew jokes about our future/marriage. Such as "When we get married lets name our first child Raine". Just recently we got into a fight that lasted 4 days while it started with her being a flirt behind my back again,cause a fight and leaving me with nothing but anger for a day, the second day came and I forgave her and tried to makeup but she shoved that into my face leaving me with anger once again and leading us into a bigger fight, the third day came around and the same thing happened as day two, and the same on the fourth. But on the fourth day she suggested breaking up saying things like "but because i respect myself.. i wnat the best for myself ... and its the same for you.." as this fight was the worse fight we ever had... But at the end of the fight we worked things out and we are still together but I'm still hurt and I'm pretty sure she is too. But now I'm confused about why she is still with me. I keep asking questions like "Why is she still with me? Is she with me out of pity? Does she still intend to stay together?". As I'm really frustrated, my tears flow endlessly, and I cannot sleep as it is 3am coming up with two unit exams tomorrow. This pain knowing that she wants to breakup or at least tried to break up is really unbearable.

Is there anyway to save this relationship?
What should I do?
Please Help... Any answer would be great and really appreciated...
Thank You

Hi Dan,
Well I'm 38 and been through a few relationships and a lot of break ups and heartache. If she wants to brak up then she will, you won't be able to stop her no matter what. It hurts like hell and you'll cry buckets of tears trust me. If you feel so down and you really think that she wants to break up then why not try to take control of the situation, tell her you need to talk and tell her that you think she wants it to end. Ask her if there is anything you can do or say to change her mind and if you do split up ask her what you might have done wrong so that next time you're in a relationship you can put it right (I'm not saying it's your fault). If you are sure she wants to split then maybe tell her that you have decided to break up for a while so you can work out what you want, at least then you're in control of the situation.
Good luck mate, and let me know how you get on.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Dan_H

I'm new to this site so I really don't know where to start off... I'm a 15 year old boy, I have been dating my girlfriend for 7months and 22days now. She is my first girlfriend as i'm her third boyfriend. I spoil her a lot, i'm the only boyfriend who has been approved by her family members. I love her very much and I would give the world up just to be with her as I have put up with a lot of crap that I didn't need just from her family members alone(An example was I had to bus to her house at 9pm, she lives about a 45minute bus ride away and had to bus home around 1am in the morning because her parents wanted to have a "talk" about our relationship). We broke up once before, about 3 months into the relationship. When we first broke up it was because of the constant pain of her being a big flirt behind my back(I found out she was a big flirt around 2 months in the relationship as she promised to stop), shortly afew days after the breakup I realised I love her and I wanted her back. As it took me a month to get her back, during the breakup I skipped afew classes to visit her(as she went to a different school), called her a lot, and we were constantly contacting each other. Right when I gave up she asked me for a second chance. Ever since then we have been very happy and there have been afew jokes about our future/marriage. Such as "When we get married lets name our first child Raine". Just recently we got into a fight that lasted 4 days while it started out with her being a flirt behind my back again,cause a fight and leaving me with nothing but anger for a day, the second day came and I forgave her and tried to makeup but she shoved that into my face leaving me with anger once again and leading us into a bigger fight, the third day came around and the exact same thing happened as day two, and the exact same on the fourth. But on the fourth day she suggested breaking up saying things like "but because i respect myself.. i wnat the best for myself ... and its the same for you.." as this fight was the worse fight we ever had... But at the end of the fight we worked things out and we are still together but i'm still hurt and i'm pretty sure she is too. But now i'm confused about why she is still with me. I keep asking questions like "Why is she still with me? Is she with me out of pity? Does she still intend to stay together?". As i'm really frustrated, my tears flow endlessly, and I cannot sleep as it is 3am coming up with two unit exams tomorrow. This pain knowing that she wants to breakup or at least tried to break up is really unbearable.

Is there anyway to save this relationship?
What should I do?
Please Help... Any answer would be great and really appreciated...
Thank You

---

You need to move on. You're only 15 years old. Yea you might say you love her, but does she really love you? To me it seems like she doesn't know what she wants. She may want you, but not in a relationship kind of way. I would let her know how you feel and go from there. Stress and lies aren't good on a relationship at all. If you really love her like you say you do... then let her go. Let her find out what she wants. That's in my opinion. Good Luck!

Sounds a bit whorish to me... 3rd boyfriend and 15-18 years old?

Well, don't worry about her. Focus on college...

Sounds like you are pushing and she may feel obligated and not want to hurt your feelings.
Back off with asking so many questions and having so many insecurities that alone can be a turn off to a girl. Many girls like guys that are more confident and just relate to them without all the what about, what if, what should's and all.
Just enjoy your time together and don't push for anything serious. You are only going to work yourself into a heartache.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ashbrae3

She may want you, but not in a relationship kind of way.

---

I'll be honest with you,"Dan_H"

All her flirting really DOESN'T make a good relationship. :( It seems to me as if she is
Trying to "test you out"

And,it's not the first time that her flirting has caused you some problems.
It has caused you to ask some very serious questions

What I'm thinking about,are questions,such as, "Why is she still with me? Is she with me out of pity? Does she still intend to stay together?".

Seems to me you have too many doubts,for this relationship to work.

You are still not in a position to financially assist her as you are too younger for having a girl friend. You should focus on your studies and try to be a prominent person in your society then it will be easy for you to have a super girl for your life.