hi

i have been dating my boyfriend on and off for the past five years. why have we been dating on and off you might ask??? well we started dating when we were 15 and well its hard to stay w/ someone for that long when your sooo young. we know realize at the age of 20 and 21 that we need eachother in our lives and that this is what we want for the rest of our lives. we have a beautiful relationship and a rare connection w/ one another. he really is my other half. but the problem is he has bipolar disorder. he has never been to a dr about it or has taken meds to treat it. he refuses. why does he refuse, well his father was bipolar as well and went to see drs and took meds and well he ended up running away from his family and eventually taking his own life. so my boyfriend doesnt beileve it will work for him either and also hates drs now because of what happened to his father.

but it takes a toll on your relationship not to mention my own sanity. the good is sooo amazing, but the bad is sooo terriable, that it is scary at some times. i have been doing my research on the disorder so i know that they did reasurrance, so our breaking up so many times in the past didnt help my situation at all. but leaving him isnt an option for me and i am sure i want to do this. i want to help him, but i know that drs arent an option for me to use. can anyone help me with some alternate routes??? :(

Living with this disorder is a very hard thing to deal with, with out medication. I can see why your boyfriend won't go to the DR. He is being haunted my his past about his Father. This alone will way very heavely on ones mind. I live with this disorder as well and I take no medication for it. But with my case it is very mild and I am able to deal with it and so has my family.
There is no way you can help him without him wanting to get help. No one can make anyone get help for anything unless they are willing to do so. Have you talked to him about reseaching this disorder with you ? That could help him. He could learn about all that is going on with him and just maybe this could open the door for him to get help.

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Originally Posted by SpringStNy

hi

i have been dating my boyfriend on and off for the past five years. why have we been dating on and off you might ask??? well we started dating when we were 15 and well its hard to stay w/ someone for that long when your sooo young. we know realize at the age of 20 and 21 that we need eachother in our lives and that this is what we want for the rest of our lives. we have a beautiful relationship and a rare connection w/ one another. he really is my other half. but the problem is he has bipolar disorder. he has never been to a dr about it or has taken meds to treat it. he refuses. why does he refuse, well his father was bipolar as well and went to see drs and took meds and well he ended up running away from his family and eventually taking his own life. so my boyfriend doesnt beileve it will work for him either and also hates drs now because of what happened to his father.

but it takes a toll on your relationship not to mention my own sanity. the good is sooo amazing, but the bad is sooo terriable, that it is scary at some times. i have been doing my research on the disorder so i know that they did reasurrance, so our breaking up so many times in the past didnt help my situation at all. but leaving him isnt an option for me and i am sure i want to do this. i want to help him, but i know that drs arent an option for me to use. can anyone help me with some alternate routes??? :(

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Hi Spring,

I too suffer from bi-polar.

The constant break-up and make-up is VERY common in my world.(I did it for years while untreated)

The main problem I see is getting the help YOU need,if you want to trudge down the road of support for your significant other,you need as much information as you can get!

First thing is to properly diagnose the issue,IS HE BI-POLAR?

Here is a sample test online.Allsup - Free Bipolar Evaluation

If this is the situation,here is a support site(it is a for profit site mind you)

How to Recognize, Cope and Deal with Your Loved One's Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar Parenting

Discover the Comprehensive, Proven System That’s Helped My Mom and Thousands of Other People with Bipolar Disorder Rebuild a “Normal” Life

This 'Educated' my family greatly about my illness,they had little idea of its real effects on me,only the effects on them.

To crawl in to a bi-polar mind,the average person would not chose to return.

I feel for his anger and lack of trust in professionals,BUT,he needs to seek help,lest he goes down the same street as his father did.

Most people with bi-polar can deal with certain areas of stress with little help,but when a fit hits(and you have seen some)what does that person do?Lash out?Hide?Use irrational behavior to complete their fit,and to what end?A new break-up?

I suggest subtle hints towards professional help,a little goes a long way during the manic phase(when we are the most agreeable)or during the depression phase(when we are the most suggestible).

These are just my opinions,I am not a health care professional,just someone who has been in their care for many years,negotiating the happy road to destiny.

Keep posting in here,we all need to see possible progress with others suffering,whether they are bi-polar or supporters of us.

Ken