We live in Pennsylvania. My daughter is 10. Her father hasn't seen her in over 5 years. He hasn't paid much child support at all. He wants me to drop all arrears and he'll sign away his rights so my husband can adopt her. This is what we all want. However, I refuse to spend money on an attorney because her father is so inconsistent that I fear I will spend $1000 and then he'll change his mind. I think he should pay the expense of an attorney to have the proper papers drawn up, then I will have my attorney review them. He tells me, however, that because it has been so long since he's seen her, it is now considered abandonment. He tells me that I can go to the courthouse and file a motion on my own and he will show up and sign his rights away. I need to know if this is true. I can't afford to spend any money on this unless I know I will get the desired outcome. Also, he told me he will be getting disability soon. So isn't my child entitled to disability through him because of the child support order? Help!! I am so confused :confused:

Its possible. Go to your local family court and explain the circumstances. Its possible you can prepare adoption papers on your own. But I wouldn't recommend it. Since YOU are the one seeking to terminate parental rights and having your husband adoipt, then the cost of an attorney is on you.

If he renenges and refuses to relinquish, then you go after him for the support arrears AND for attorney fees.