My partner and I have sex a lot. Almost every time we are together in his room. It is very rare that we don't have sex. Even though I love and enjoy sex I feel that the original intimacy sex brought to us has gone. I want to minimise how often him and I have sex and gain control but I am finding it very hard to say no to him because I enjoy it just as much.

Is there even anything I can do?

Hey luvabubble

I'm guessing your missing the romantic side of things?

I suggest you talk to him and tell him that, although you absolutely love sex, you would like to slow things down. Make a compromise with him. Tell him exactly what you want to happen in the bedroom and then let him tell you what he wants. Find some middle ground. Win Win.

Take care and have fun ;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by aaii

Hey luvabubble

I'm guessing your missing the romantic side of things?

I suggest you talk to him and tell him that, although you absolutely love sex, you would like to slow things down. Make a compromise with him. Tell him exactly what you want to happen in the bedroom and then let him tell you what he wants. Find some middle ground. Win Win.

Take care and have fun ;)

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Thank you. Well now that I have exams in the next month it is likely that for the first time, we won't have sex. Then when exams are over I wanted to do something for him with out being sexual. Any suggestions?

"My partner and i have sex alot."

Obviously that's a great thing, but what most people don't realize is that sex can actually make two people further apart than close. It ironic because usually that's what makes the intimacy and the walls come down, but in reality, too much of anything - especially sex - is just not good. Eventually we become like animals, and the "real" closeness fades.

'even though I love and enjoy sex I feel that the original intimacy sex brought to us has gone."

And you are right - it does happen often. Stay true to your feelings and discover other ways to stay intimate. If you really want love - and I am assuming this is what you are after - you have to build your relationship on a other foundations. It just seems like sex is the main thing in your relationship and it doesnt leave room for anything else.

"I want to minimise how often him and I have sex and gain control but I am finding it very hard to say no to him because I enjoy it just as much. "

There's plenty you can do. It sounds to me you are just more afraid of his reaction but you are actually pretty sure you don't want sex this way. You sound uncomfortable about it which means you have some inner doubts... a break from sex will show you the truth you are looking for, it will or should make you closer (soul wise) if its true love, and it will tell you a lot about the nature of sex and love. Please don't feel guilty or worried to be honest with him about these feelings and thoughts. If he really loves you he will respect and understand what you want and need. He will even find joy in abstaining from sex and your intimacy will be much more profound. Good luck.