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-   -   Sort of a poem! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=141341)

  • Oct 16, 2007, 09:37 AM
    firmbeliever
    3 Attachment(s)
    Sort of a poem!
    In each raindrop,
    From the heavens
    Every blade of grass,
    That sprouts from the earth.
    The beat of wings rising towards the skies.
    Have each a story of its own.
    A lullaby for the soul,
    But only for ones who love the earth,
    With all their hearts.
    ----------------
    Written in 2000

    Not what could be exactly classified as poetry,but this does have memories attached to it from long ago.
    I can't take credit for the pics though... all from the net.
    But I thought they seemed appropriate.
  • Oct 16, 2007, 10:09 AM
    Choux
    The last two lines make it preaching, not poetry. :)
  • Oct 16, 2007, 10:55 AM
    firmbeliever
    Preaching?
    I am sure there are a lot of people who have seen these things but couldn't care much to appreciate some things in nature,because they are used to it.:)
  • Oct 16, 2007, 11:56 AM
    firmbeliever
    Choux,
    Start your own non preaching thread... ;)

    Or you are going to make me wish I had not started this thread.
    Which I already do wish I had not... :(
  • Oct 18, 2007, 12:25 PM
    Choux
    I should have tempered my critique with praise for your beautiful thoughts.

    I apologize.
  • Oct 18, 2007, 12:43 PM
    firmbeliever
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Choux
    I should have tempered my critique with praise for your beautiful thoughts.

    I apologize.

    Oh! Be your honest self that is better than being a hypocrite.:p
  • Nov 25, 2007, 03:54 PM
    kiki_doki
    I think the poem is lovely!. short but sweet! And a poem can be whatever you want it to be!! I saw that you wrote it in 2000, any reason as to why you pointed that out? Do you have more recent ones you'd care to share? (",)
  • Nov 25, 2007, 04:24 PM
    Wondergirl
    It's a lovely poem! And I like the photos you chose.

    Are the last two lines a warning to the reader?

    I'll be a nitpicker and suggest you change "have" in line six to "has".
  • Nov 25, 2007, 04:43 PM
    bushg
    Firm I think the words are beautiful, all you need to add is a picture of winter. You have really good taste in photographs.
  • Nov 25, 2007, 06:32 PM
    shygrneyzs
    It is a lovely poem and cannot see any preaching in it at all. When we write it is our heart on that paper. Thank you for sharing.
  • Nov 27, 2007, 11:08 AM
    firmbeliever
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by kiki_doki
    I think the poem is lovely!!!!!....short but sweet! and a poem can be whatever you want it to be!!! I saw that you wrote it in 2000, any reason as to why you pointed that out? do you have more recent ones you'd care to share? (",)

    Thank you Kiki...
    I mentioned the year because it was sometime back and since then the way I write might have changed a little:).
    And that was in a different country.

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Wondergirl
    It's a lovely poem! and I like the photos you chose.
    Are the last two lines a warning to the reader?
    I'll be a nitpicker and suggest you change "have" in line six to "has".

    The last lines were what seemed best at that time,I am less forceful now... more mellow:p .

    Thanks for nitpicking,sometimes constructive criticism is good..

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by bushg
    Firm I think the words are beautiful, all you need to add is a picture of winter. You have really good taste in photographs.

    Thanks

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by shygrneyzs
    It is a lovely poem and cannot see any preaching in it at all. When we write it is our heart on that paper. Thank you for sharing.

    Thank you!
  • Nov 29, 2007, 08:38 AM
    kiki_doki
    You are most welcome... (",) Am going to be nosy now, which country were/are you in? Apologies! No reply necessary... (if I am just being too nosy)
  • Nov 29, 2007, 08:45 AM
    Tuscany
    That is a beautiful poem.
    It paints a picture in the readers mind.
    Wonderful FB
  • Dec 7, 2007, 02:06 PM
    firmbeliever
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by kiki_doki
    You are most welcome... (",) Am going to be nosy now, which country were/are you in? Appologies! No reply necessary..... (if i am just being too nosy)

    Kiki
    I was in India at that time... not anymore though.


    Tusc,
    Thank you...
  • Dec 15, 2007, 03:48 PM
    jrebel7
    FB, I ran across this thread. Your poem and photos are beautiful. I am so guilty of going through life with blinders on and not really noticing the beauty all around me. We get so entangled in our jobs, duties, errands, we tend not to see the beauty that the earth offers. When I am in the woods, sitting still and listening to the sounds of nature, I feel the lullaby you are speaking about. Your poem is a good reminder for us to take the time to appreciate the beauty around us. Thank you for sharing!

    What I received as I read the poem was that only when we stop, look and listen, can we hear the lullaby for the soul that the beauty offers. I do love to be still and notice the miracle of creation, watch an insect work or see a deer graze and come into view in the woods or sit out at night and view the stars and the constellations, knowing it was all set into motion in a much larger picture than I will know in this lifetime. But I am the world's worst for getting too busy to hear that lullaby. It was a great reminder for me. Thanks again for sharing!

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