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-   -   Girlfriend said she needs time to figure things out! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=141142)

  • Oct 15, 2007, 08:35 PM
    Hockeyguy9
    Girlfriend said she needs time to figure things out!
    My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 2 years now. We haven't been intimate in awhile... almost 3 months... about 4 days ago we decided to take a short break because she wants to live her life freely, and doesn't want to be "married" at the age of 18... completely understandable, right?. So yesterday (Sunday) she says that she doesn't know about me, but she feels that not being together is the best thing for now. She says that she wants to live her life and figure things out because she is confused. She said that she needs some time to herself, but she still loves me.

    When I asked her if she thinks that we will get back together she said that she don't know and only time will tell... But we are still friends and everything and she talks to me... (I let her initiate the conversations and whether to hang out). Before we go to bed she still says she loves me and good night... Now I know that we are broken up, but I tell myself this seems more like a prolonged break. I mean I really don't know what to think out of this... any suggestions?
  • Oct 15, 2007, 10:02 PM
    mckenzie134
    Please explkain why you were not intimate for the llast 3 months somethng weird there as soon as the intimacy stops that is a big red flag...
  • Oct 15, 2007, 10:44 PM
    needofhelp
    Hockeyguy, my ex broke up with me and gave a similar reason, she wants to be on her own and experience life. She's 23, so this is common for anyone at this age. You are doing a great job in letting her initiate the conversation. Give her the space and the time she asked for. Like others will say, take the time to focus on yourself and enjoy life. There's nothing to read into because only she knows what she is really feeling and no one on here can tell you what she feels. I'm guessing that you are around her age as well. I'm 25, and we are both at young man. Do the things you always wanted to do. There's a lot to grow and experience at that age. People on this forum are great and can offer you some insight. You always have a place to go. Take it easy, and enjoy.
  • Oct 16, 2007, 09:44 AM
    Hockeyguy9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by mckenzie134
    Please explkain why you were not intimate for the llast 3 months somethng weird there as soon as the intimacy stops that is a big red flag...

    She says that she wasn't cheating on me... which I believe because she is a very straight forward person, she isn't like that, and she has no reason not to tell me now. She says that we haven't been because things haven't been the same lately and we've lost that spark. So she says that she needs some time right now to figure things out. I mean it almost seems like nothing has really changed other than what we consider ourselves now. Like she still says she loves me and her Facebook still says in a relationship... So I don't know really how to take this... I understand that right now she wants time to herself... but I'm not sure if this is more of a temporary thing or permanent... obviouslly it could be either or, but judging from what's going on its somewhat hard to say. What do you all think?
  • Oct 16, 2007, 09:50 AM
    madaman
    The best advice I can give you is go and read every single question on here where the person was in your situation. You will see that their story is almost identical to yours, and depending how old the question is, you will see the outcome (which is usually them accepting that the girl is gone and moving on).
  • Oct 16, 2007, 01:06 PM
    Hockeyguy9
    I have read on other postings that people have ceased communication with their ex's. I'm not the one who emails her, I'm not the one who calls and texts her. So if she is contacting me, I know that is obviouslly better than me contacting her, but is it getting us anywhere in a sense of being together again? Honestly, our conversations are almost the same as before... The only thing she said she wants is space and some time to figure out what is going on in her life. She said that they say "if you love something, let it go, and if it comes back it was meant to be" or something like that. This is a tough situation for me because I don't really know how to take our status.

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