Originally Posted by RubyPitbull
rutogoswami, you are in a situation that most Americans & Europeans who don't have any first hand experience in an arranged marriage find hard to understand. Is his family living with you or having dinner with you every evening? Do they all have jobs outside the home as well? What would occur if you didn't come home immediately after work but either stayed late at work or went out to dinner with your friends?
Have you spoken with your own Mother about this or any of your women friends? Have these other women given you any advice as to how to handle this? I think it would be most beneficial to speak with other women who have been in this situation before and find out how they handled it when they were first married. It sounds as if your husband's family is treating you as if you are their personal chef. People can only take advantage of us when we allow them to do so. If you are cooking for his family every night, I would suggest that prior to leaving for work one morning, or even the evening before while you are having dinner, you tell them you need to work late the following evening. Tell his mother and his sisters that you would appreciate it if they would cook dinner that night and you will get home as soon as you can so that you can join them for dinner. Then, show up at the time when dinner should be on the table. See what happens.
Just as an added piece of advice, do not complain about your husband to his own mother. He is her son and she will not listen to you. In her eyes, he has no faults. So you are wasting your time complaining to her and she will only grow to dislike you. You need to turn to your own mother or other older women friends who can come up with some constructive advice as to how to deal with your husband and his family.
