My fears and worries over my middle school girl
Sometimes my mind cannot comprehend how my daughter is growing up so fast. I suddenly realize that I am not capable of protecting her every move. Middle school is so different and I am struggling with the changes that have come along with it. SHe is bright, she is social, she is beautiful and an amazing person, but I think maybe that bothers some people. Boys give her a hard time, and certain girls whisper and laugh. Her old friends ignore her and leave her out. She is so strong and doesn't seem to get too upset about it. When I ask what can I do, she says nothing mom, it's fine. No, it certainly doesn't feel fine to me.
YEs the concerns are mild and I know I am overly sensitive to these issues because she is my child, but more because I can't fix it. I can't go to school and talk to her friends and work it all out. In elementary school, I knew everyone and they knew me. When she would have problems with her friends, I would help them talk and work it out. I know I have to surrender control and she is becoming more independent and mature. Does that mean I don't get to feel sad and worried too?
TO top it all off, I have to put our dog Chu to sleep today. He is 14 and he has been with us his whole life, and the entire lives of my children. We have two other dogs and she will survive. I just never thought I would have to do this and I know she is affected by it greatly. I never want to be a source of pain or discomfort and yet I am putting her dog down, which is so saddening for us all.
The responsibilities of parenthood are something I took on with vigor and confidence. I think when they are small, it is easy to be confident and sure of yourself with the decisions you make. Yes you question the small things, but the bigger problems, don't come in until later. My child is such a blessing, such a good kid and yet she is struggling in her own way. Maybe it is necessary and yes we all went through these things, it's just really hard for me. First the bra, then the braces, then middle school and gosh whatever else is coming up, I am sure will make this look like a piece of cake.
So why do I feel like my heart is breaking and the tears keep rolling down my cheeks. Am I just a wimpy parent?