Hi All

I'm new here and I have a problem. I'm married for 8 years now with 2 children. Our sex life is slowly becoming less which is understandable due to the kids taking much of our time away from one another. We go early to bed now a days because we are tired. But some night I wake up and watch my wife sleeping. Get turned on seeing parts of her body. I started touching her while she's asleep and she has no memory of this. So I started taking some of her clothes off during her sleep and touching and looking at her private parts and she still does remember things. Its getting all worst as I now take pictures of her body. I tried stopping, deleted all the pics and then I can't get myself to tell her what I have done as this would be a bad idea, but now and again I end up doing the same thing again.

It's the thrill of not getting caught that seems to turn me on, its weird, and the prize are getting away with pictures which I immediately delete anyway because its not safe to keep pictures like that anywhere now a days. I got myself to watch a movie or play games on my PC when I get this urge and its helping, but I can't seem to get this out of my head.

Is there something wrong with me? I'm I the only one with a problem like this ?

Regards
John

She's your wife. So, It's not cheating and no one as far as I can tell is getting hurt.

At some point tell her it turns you on, and you may do it again... I don't see any harm.
She may wake up and share in the fun or she may not... Why not share the pix sometime.

She'd be glad to know you still think she's hot... Wonder what her fantasy is? "-)

I've had voyeur fetishes for a long time about my partner. I've written here before that I love to see her in the shower when she leaves the door open and I can see some skin though the curtain... even though I could just as well be in the bathroom watching her and she wouldn't mind.

Likewise, sometimes when I'm in the back yard, which is private, I've seen her undress with the blinds open and its just a huge turn on. Again, I could march right into the room and she wouldn't say a word of refusal, but the voyeur aspect is a huge turn on.

I've also dated women who were willing to oblige some sexy photography desires. While my partner has seemed uninterested at passing suggestions, and I haven't pushed the issue, taking sensual pictures is something I've wanted to do for some time.

The compromise? While working with some digital photo editing programs I found some that did some interesting renderings from photos... stuff like turning a photo into a sketch-type stuff or really unique looks. I took some pics we had and a few that I found on the internet (nothing really racey, but pics of women I thought shed think were nicely done and tasteful) and then I used the program to show her some of the things that can be done to make a common photo something really different.

One photo, for ex was a pic of my wife holding our day old son. She always liked the pic, but the photo editing really made it something great. Another pic was one of a female model, clothed tightly, in a dance pose. Its hard to describe here, but I took that photo and made it look like a different piece of art, and one I think she would have bought off the shelf. She's always loved art of sensual women, art with dancers, and art that inspires passion. I just had to find a way to get my desires to meet with hers.

After seeing this I told her id like to take some sensual, well-done pics of her and id like to do some artistic rendering like I showed her. Her response was "im open to that... maybe something we can place in the bedroom"...

Needless to say, its been a nice compromise. We've got a few great pieces that she really likes and I get indulged in a fetish of sorts. She sees the pics I take and she sees the results. Even though its not voyeur, still the act of taking a photo of your mate can be a powerful drive.

Is it wrong, what you are doing? Yeah. You know it is if she wouldn't consent. Is it as wrong as undressing a stranger whose passed out... well, no.

But lets not pretend its OK as long as nobody knows. If she wakes up she might very well be angry and question how long this has been going on. Trust issue.

And on your side, you have some energy you need to channel, and you need an outlet somehow. Maybe if you can think about what she likes and doesn't you can find a way to get her to meet you halfway.