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-   -   Teaching teen daughter manners (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=137543)

  • Oct 5, 2007, 07:13 PM
    Mom of one daughter
    Teaching teen daughter manners
    My 15 year old daughter talks on the phone with a guy she likes as a friend. Now, I know the guy likes her for more, but he hasn't pushed their friendship. Problem: She talks very rude to him and isn't very nice. I've told her a million times she dsn't have to like him for more but at least be nice on the phone. I asked the guy why he puts up with it and he says that is just how teens talk on the phone.

    Question: How do I get her to understand this isn't how teens talk on the phone? I don't care who she talks with, I want her to be polite. HELP!
  • Oct 5, 2007, 08:31 PM
    bre1028
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Mom of one daughter
    My 15 year old daughter talks on the phone with a guy she likes as a friend. Now, I know the guy likes her for more, but he hasn't pushed their friendship. Problem: She talks very rude to him and isn't very nice. I've told her a million times she dsn't have to like him for more but at least be nice on the phone. I asked the guy why he puts up with it and he says that is just how teens talk on the phone.

    Question: How do I get her to understand this isn't how teens talk on the phone? I don't care who she talks with, I want her to be polite. HELP!

    I am a teen too and I can be really rude to people too just like your daughter and maybe you can get your daughter to go manner classes. I don't put up with people being rude to me if I notice that there being rude.what rude things does she say?maybe you can find a manner school in your area.
  • Oct 5, 2007, 09:02 PM
    AKaeTrue
    For starters, you could make her apologize, get off the phone, and ground phone privileges.
    It will take time, but if you do not condone the behavior but cannot change her ways, you can most certainly prevent it by grounding her when you hear the rudeness.
  • Oct 5, 2007, 09:36 PM
    grammadidi
    I agree with Kae. To carry it a bit further, it IS possible that this guy makes her uncomfortable but she feels even more uncomfortable ending it. Sometimes it's just easier to blame your parents for a broken relationship. Maybe she WANTS you to draw an end to it to help her save face. Just a thought, anyhow...

    Hugs, Didi
  • Oct 5, 2007, 11:42 PM
    templelane
    ^^ Ah the old my mother won't let me trick! I used to use that all the time, I'd walk downstairs with a piece of paper 'call me for tea' written on it, or say I wasn't allowed out etc. Emotional cowardace yes but it's hard to be tactful when you are 15.

    You should chat to your daughter about why she is rude. Do it in a girls chatting kind of way, go to a salon or for a coffee, just put in a conversation the same way you would a friend. That way you should be ale to slip under the defences and get to see why she does what she does. She is probably confused.
  • Oct 7, 2007, 03:46 PM
    Marzapan741
    Reverse Physcology. Be rude to her on the phone, as she is.

    Maybe it will hit her.

    If not.

    Just let her grow out of it.
    After all, she is a teenager.

    Talking to her can be good.
    Asking her why she is rude.
    Maybe there is a reason.

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