Ask Me Help Desk - He tried to commit suicide

My 23 year old cousin tried to commit suicide the other day. He slit his wrist, ended up hitting two majot veins and a major artery and had to get 30 staples to stop the bleeding. He is over 8 hours away, but I want to try everything I can to help him. I offered him my support many times, made sure he knows that I am here for him through thick and thin.
I still feel so useless though knowing that he's in so much emotional and mental pain and I can't help him. This was over a girl, his fiancé who broke up with him.

Any advice on how I can help him?

It sounds to me as if you are doing everything that you can.

When someone resorts to something like suicide they are usually so deep into depressing that there is not much loved ones can do. Your cousin needs the help of professionals to get through this.

I say just keep being the loving cousin that you are. Let him know you are always here for him no matter the distance and that you love him very much.

In situations like this its very easy to feel that there was more that you could've done and if you had just done something it never would have happened. When people are depressed nothing there is nothing that a loved one can say or do that will bring them out of it. It seems like knowing that someone is loved and cared for should be enough but depression makes people feel alone no matter what anyone else says.

I'm so happy that your cousin was found and was able to be saved. As he gets help he will see how lucky he was. I hope he is able to have a speedy recovery and get the help he needs.

Thank you.
I definitely understand the effects of depression. I had tried to commit suicide when I was 13, I was put into suclusion etc. I still deal with pretty bad depression. Which is why I feel so bad that I can't help him. I should know what to do for him, Ive had years of experience with it.
I asked him to give some thought in coming up here to visit. He can stay with me, (Im a stay at home wife and have a baby on the way due next month, I don't leave too often these days) here I can take care of him and help him the best I can. Not only me, the whole family. His dad and sister live here too.

Im just so scared for him.

The best thing for him in all honesty is to be helped by professionals. When we've been through something like mental illness its seems as though we should be equipped to help people but the truth is that everyday folks like us don't have the necessary skills and training to really reach them. It seems like its not enough but all you can do is love him, support him and encourage him to seek counseling. It sounds as if he should move closer to you since there is a greater support network. I would talk to the rest of the family and see if everyone couldn't see about getting him to move. I think that would be a great thing. I'm sure he could get help and then he would have all his loved ones.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alicia85

Thank you.
I definitely understand the effects of depression. I had tried to commit suicide when I was 13, I was put into suclusion etc. I still deal with pretty bad depression. Which is why I feel so bad that I can't help him. I should know what to do for him, Ive had years of experience with it.

Im just so scared for him.

Alicia you can only do things to help yourself and you seem to have done well coping with depression. He will have to find his own way of coping and coming through this, maybe with professional help. Sometimes the most desperate times in our lives turn out to be the foundation for making remarkable and positive changes for ourselves. You can only point your cousin in the right direction and you seem to be doing everything you can. Hopefully with your support - talking to him about recovery, positive things in his life, seeking help, he will be able to build from this point.

You sound like a exceptionally kind and caring person, thank God for that, this is what he needs, and to do what he did, he is not thinking right, he does not perceive life like other well people. And the good Samaritan didn't stop, wake the guy up and tell him he needed professional help, he acted himself, did as much as he could, all he could. This kind of caring is what is missing in this world today. People will help so long as it doesn't interrupt their lives, God forbid. He is fortunate to have YOU, and you both are in my prayers!!