Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Adult Sexuality (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=370)
-   -   Boyfriend looks at porn sites, cheating? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=133965)

  • Sep 26, 2007, 08:15 AM
    SeekingAdvice000
    Boyfriend looks at porn sites, cheating?
    Is it cheating if my boyfriend goes to porn sites and signed up for a sexual dating site and he signed up and goes to free web cam and cyber chats with other girls?
  • Sep 26, 2007, 08:17 AM
    Lowtax4eva
    I'd say yes, looking at porn and having sexual chats with girls online are totally different things. How do you feel about it?
  • Sep 26, 2007, 08:23 AM
    SeekingAdvice000
    I hate that he looks at porn sites and stuff. He even denies that he looks at them and has signed up for some free web cam and for a sexual dating site. I looked in his computer history and it was all there and he still denies it. Like it makes me feel like my body isn't good enough for him and he has to go and look at other girls. It really makes me feel uncomfortable also. :(
  • Sep 26, 2007, 09:19 AM
    Foxy459459
    Looking at porn is one thing but signing up for sexual dating sites is TOTALLY DIFFERENT. I would think that is cheating. I would have a serious conversation with him or I would dump him in a heart beat. You deserve better then that sweetie...
  • Sep 26, 2007, 02:56 PM
    whitehawk
    I agree with foxy, he is cheating
  • Sep 26, 2007, 02:57 PM
    s_cianci
    To me it would be.
  • Sep 27, 2007, 03:14 AM
    Foxy459459
    Like I said before just looking at porn is one thing but when you sign up for those sexual dating sites that's a WHOLE DIFFERENT SUBJECT... That means he is trying to explore other options. And how is that fair to you? He wants to have his cake and eat it to? I don't think so. Sweetie put your running sneakers on and get the hell away from him! If he is looking on the internet for other options then what do you think he is doing behind your back when your not around? You so deserve a man that is going to A. Respect you, and B. Be with you and only you! Good luck to you, anf be good to you...
  • Jan 17, 2008, 10:08 AM
    BROCKSGIRL86
    I know how you feel my husband is doing the same thing. I just posted the same question. If you want to take a look that wound be cool.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 10:42 AM
    lavenderly
    A) Looking at porn and shares it with u? --> NOT cheating
    B) Looking at porn and denies the fact? --> CHEATING!
    C) Looking at porn + looking for other gals --> CHEATING!
    D) Looking at porn + looking for other gals + denying the fact --> NOT WORTH FORGIVING

    He is bringing his addiction too far. Even looking at porn can be offensive to some girlfriends, what more watching other gals through web cams and dating them online?

    I would say he is very selfish and callous. A boyfriend who really cares would tell his girlfriend about his porn interests when she probes for answers. Did he not think of you when he signed up for all those chats?

    Honey, you are not appreciated. In fact, maybe you are not loved at all.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 11:06 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    I will agree with lavenderly,

    While I have my opinoins of porn, if you and him were sitting down together and watching it, if that is what floats your boat then sail it.

    There is one "dating site" that being a member allows you to watch porn videos free, so he could be on that one, just for the free porn
    ** things you learn at confession

    But most porn gives the man a very poor opinon of women and their sexual satisfaction.

    If this is not a joint acivity, then it is a cheating situation.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 01:44 PM
    Delow84
    I had the same thing with ex GF, early on I would look at porn, it bothered her so I stopped. She said the same things, it made her feel like she wasn't enough. So that is why I stopped.
    I would say it is definitely a form of cheating. Webcams is way different. Either way if he denies it and its in his history, you KNOW he is doing it. He isn't going to stop. And he knows he is doing something wrong if he has to hide it. I agree with other posts, he is cheating
    If he doesn't care how it makes you feel, he isn't worth it.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 01:47 PM
    BKarinaG
    DUH YYYEESSSS!! Hes probably having webcam sex
  • Jan 17, 2008, 01:59 PM
    jds12345
    OK yes! Cheating 100%
    I know that my boyfriend looks at porn every once in a while, which I am fine with. I mean if it was all the time, I would be a bit confused. Its not something I ask about a lot or he talks about, but if the subject came up, neither of us would be surprised by the conversation. But talking with other girls is totally wrong! That means that he's finding something he enjoys better with these random asses than you... which is weird and unhealthy. You have every reason to be upset. The fact that he doesn't feel guilty by these actions is really disturbing as well.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 04:44 PM
    TrueFaith
    Looking at porn I wouldn't call that cheating. Its like if a chicks with you thinking about some hot celeb or something, just a thing

    But the online dating is cheating
  • Jan 17, 2008, 05:01 PM
    Delow84
    Again I agree with the other posts, and I've been on both sides of 'looking isn't cheating' and it is. Personally if its OK with both partners, its OK. If it hurts one, makes them insecure with their own bodies when they weren't before. Id consider that a form of cheating, and wrong. Esp if you have to hide it.
    And online dating is cheating period.
  • Jan 17, 2008, 06:55 PM
    Brandino747
    It's weird, but I checked out more chicks and looked at more 'skin' pics when I was with a girl...

    I never cheated on her, and had a few chances..
  • Mar 25, 2008, 11:02 AM
    yourman64
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by SeekingAdvice000
    is it cheating if my boyfriend goes to porn sites and signed up for a sexual dating site and he signed up and goes to free web cam and cyber chats with other girls?

    Yes I would say it is cheating, and in the bible it says to not look at other women if you are married
  • Mar 25, 2008, 12:34 PM
    nkychic
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by SeekingAdvice000
    I hate that he looks at porn sites and stuff. He even denies that he looks at them and has signed up for some free web cam and for a sexual dating site. I looked in his computer history and it was all there and he still denies it. Like it makes me feel like my body isnt good enough for him and he has to go and look at other girls. It really makes me feel uncomfortable also. :(

    Looking at porn is one thing. Going to sexual dating sites is another. Not to mention the fact that he is blatantly lying about it does not make him look any more trustworthy. If you have any desire to make this work, tell him how you feel and you will leave him if he continues to do so. You have to draw the line, if he chooses to cross it. Then leave and don't turn back. Trust seems to be an issue anyway, or you wouldn't have felt the need to search his computer. You may find that you are happier without him.

    <3 Leslie

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:53 AM.