Does anyone have any idea on what I need to do to win my ex back?
Has anyone here lost there partner then won them back?
Any help would be great :)

Hi Sarah, A little more info might help. Were you married? How old are the cast members? Why is he an "X"? How long has he been an X? How long were you together? Take some time and help may come your way.

Sorry. No we were not married we were together a year I know it doesn't seem that long but I really do love him
We broke up one night for no real reason he was drunk and ended it.
He has been with someone else but said we would get back together he just needs time
But I want to hurry things up what can I do to make him like me more or show that I care.
At the moment he is ignoring my calls and messages I try not to contact him but its too hard
Please help

That's exactly I'm feeling about 2-3 weeks ago but after a wheile(we are 1 month and 1 week break) I took time to think and realize something's... we are seven years but he admits he loves another girl already it really hurts since we had so much plans together... I'm so jealous about his new girl... I'm still crying every night but what can I do if he doesn't tlove me back?that hurts like you just want to die... but just like anyone else says here let some time pass by... me I did some bad things, I drinks I go out a lot but I'm so sad... its him that I really want but what else can I do... I know that somehow I showed him what can I do for him so this time its just he who decide to come back and start again... just time

I don't like the waiting game.
I say to myself all the time right I'm not going to message him today cause his not writing back
But I end up sending him about 10 messages that day with still no reply
I don't see how they can move on so quickly.
I gave him everything thought money I lent him my car anything he wanted everything
And I just sit here and wonder what's this girl giving hm that I couldn't.
It does hurt especially cause she lives just around the corner and I see them together sometimes
He stayed at my house the other day and he doesn't want her knowing anything about it I mean they split up as well and I have a feeling he doesn't want her knowing cause he will loose her.
But what about me I still love him and want him back so what's he doing!!
I just don't get guys at all I've been through so much stuff with him he's been through nothing
Please help

Sarah the onlything ou can do is nothing. If he wants to come back he will call and when he does tell him your busy if a guy really wants you he will chase you...

Same question I've been asking myself too... we've been together for seven years... same as you are I have given him everything but in return he dump me for this girl who can't even offer him anything... I don't know probably they just ignore our presence since they know that we will always be around for them... but in life we got to decide for our own good otherwise we will be crazy following them and gets nothing

Hi, I recently went through a rough patch with my girlfriend a few months back. She was very indecisive about if she wanted to continue with our relationship. Long story short, she needed time to figure out what she wanted. She needed time away to see if she would miss me. At first I didn't understand and wanted answers, but then I realized that if I did give her the space she was asking for and let her figure out herself I might have a better chance. All in all, you can't 'win' someone back. If they really do want to be with you, they will come back. In the meantime give them the space they want, and try to do things that make you feel good. Its not easy. But you have to do this or you will push them away even more.

I backed off, let her find her way, and she came back, and seems to love me even more for stepping up and understanding what she was going through at the time. She looks at me now for support, rather than wanting to run away from it all. We are getting engaged this coming Sunday. Life couldn't be better and I'm so glad I gave her space.

Hope this helps you and good luck.

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Originally Posted by jeep1995

hi, i recently went through a rough patch with my girlfriend a few months back. she was very indecisive about if she wanted to continue with our relationship. long story short, she needed time to figure out what she wanted. she needed time away to see if she would miss me. at first i didnt understand and wanted answers, but then i realized that if i did give her the space she was asking for and let her figure out herself i might have a better chance. all in all, you can't 'win' someone back. if they really do want to be with you, they will come back. in the meantime give them the space they want, and try to do things that make you feel good. its not easy. but you have to do this or you will push them away even more.

i backed off, let her find her way, and she came back, and seems to love me even more for stepping up and understanding what she was going through at the time. she looks at me now for support, rather than wanting to run away from it all. we are getting engaged this coming sunday. life couldnt be better and im so glad i gave her space.

hope this helps you and good luck.

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That's a great story, I am going through almost an exact situation with my girlfriend, well exgf at the time. It has been almost 2 weeks and have hit me hard. Everyone on this forum has been telling me to just give her the space she wants and not to beg her to bring me back. I kind of did and it didn't work because its just too soon I guess. I hope my situation and everyone elese works out like yours, your story is exactly what I was looking for, hope.

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Originally Posted by bummedout4

thats a great story, i am going through almost an exact situation with my gf, well exgf at the time. it has been almost 2 weeks and have hit me hard. everyone on this forum has been telling me to just give her the space she wants and not to beg her to bring me back. i kinda did and it didn't work b/c its just too soon i guess. I hope my situation and everyone elese works out like yours, your story is exactly what i was looking for, hope.

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And you should have hope... when I first was looking for answers I turned here. Everyone also told me to give her space, but they didn't really give me any hope other than my life will eventually get better, but probably without her in it. I didn't want to hear that, that's why I posted here. I think everyone needs to hear a story every now and then that works out for the better, not the worse.

Sometimes you SO does just need some time. Its never fun or easy to let them have space, but you must give it to them.

I have a roommate, who isn't very experienced with relationships. He's 26 and has never had a girl for more than 2-3 weeks. What he does is he falls too hard for the girl he's dating, and within usually a week he tells them he loves them. This scares the girl away, naturally. Its kind of creepy and it isn't a good thing. I've told him that he needs try a different approach. Not be so clingy and don't go down the same road he always does. He won't listen, and guess what, the girl he's seeing now is ready to dump him. What an idiot.

Moral of the story, he won't try something new to better his situation. He keeps doing what he's always done, and ends up crushed every time. Poor guy.

So try something new, even though its hard, and just wait and see what happens.

By the way, I never did the no-contact thing with my girl. I just stopped asking why? Why? Why?

I started asking if she needed any help. I started listening to her problems instead of worrying if I would ever be her man again. I looked at it as she was a friend, which she is and was during the break, and gave her what she wanted. Support and time.

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Originally Posted by jeep1995

and you should have hope....when i first was looking for answers i turned here. everyone also told me to give her space, but they didnt really give me any hope other than my life will eventually get better, but probably without her in it. i didnt want to hear that, thats why i posted here. i think everyone needs to hear a story every now and then that works out for the better, not the worse.

sometimes you SO does just need some time. its never fun or easy to let them have space, but you must give it to them.

i have a roomate, who isnt very experienced with relationships. hes 26 and has never had a girl for more than 2-3 weeks. what he does is he falls too hard for the girl he's dating, and withing usually a week he tells them he loves them. this scares the girl away, naturally. its kinda creepy and it isn't a good thing. ive told him that he needs try a different approach. not be so clingy and dont go down the same road he always does. he wont listen, and guess what, the girl he's seeing now is ready to dump him. what an idiot.

moral of the story, he won't try something new to better his situation. he keeps doing what he's always done, and ends up crushed every time. poor guy.

so try something new, even though its hard, and just wait and see what happens.



by the way, i never did the no-contact thing with my girl. i just stopped asking why? why? why?

i started asking if she needed any help. i started listening to her problems instead of worrying if i would ever be her man again. i looked at it as she was a friend, which she is and was during the break, and gave her what she wanted. support and time.

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Yeah I am glad I saw your post on here. I was starting to really think that I had no chance. I probably won't be doing the total NC thing since she said she still wants to hear from me and see what's going on and she considers me a really good friend still , but I am definitely not calling her all the time or bugging her. The only issue is that I need to clear up with her if she just wants space to think and be alone or if she sees this as an opportunity to see other guys and what else is out there. Either way she needs space and I have no choice but to give it to her. We were together 4 years so I don't think she will forget about me or what kind of person I am. If it was meant to be I guess we will be. So that's my approach for now, we will see what happens. Hopefully things will work out for the best.

Jeep, in your situation did she come back to you and say she wanted you back or did you initiate by asking her or talking to her about the relationship?

I would go NC or your probably be confused all the time! "She wants to hear from me." Notice the word 'she wants' not what you want. Yes she wants you as you're a fall back, the safety net, what she's used to. Allot of dumpers or some women would love to have all their ex bfs as friends. What an ego trip!

No contact means just that absolutely no contact don't

Jiser is spot on she said, ehats best for her. She is using you as the safety net. If the ex really wanted to be anymore than friends then they wopuld be but to many people hold false hope! SHE Doesn't WANT YOU BUT WANTS YOU AS A FRIEND SO SHE CAN BE SELFISH AND USE YOU TILL SHE FINDS A NEW SUCKER THEN YOU WILL NEVER HEAR FROM HER AGAIN!

You will hear this though she will say listen just move on!! LET IT GO that's what she will say when she has someone new...

It sounds like this just happened one night about a year into your relationship. He was drunk and broke up and is now with another girl. Who would you want the survivor to be if there was just one; you or him? Yes you want to say both but first there's a basic need to survive emotionally. Your approach is to blitz this guy with every word in your vocabulary which he will diligently study and find that there's just one thing to do and that's to get back with you as fast as he can run. Sorry but right now your every word is like a hurricane to him and he will run but not to the seashore. So "zip it" and "zip it" more. You have no choice about time. You can't control that but you can learn what your made of and you will survive emotionally. We'll all be feeling what your going through, your not alone. PS Best to zip it with anyone he knows.

Thank you all for your help even though it wasn't all for me ha ha :)
I haven't been pushishing things lately I haven't asked why and if and so on I've just been acting like a friend and now his talking again so that's a good sign now I'm just ging to sit back and wait to see if he comes back to me if not I'll know how to handle myself next time round
Thank you all its beeen a big help
:) cheers xo