Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   My boyfriend is confused about his feelings for me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=130343)

  • Sep 16, 2007, 08:41 PM
    Marmalade324
    My boyfriend is confused about his feelings for me
    I have been dating this guy on and off for almost 4 years now. We were high school sweethearts and started going to college together. Well there have been times where the both of us would go through a faze and break-up, not sure of our feelings for each other.When we were a little bit younger, around the time we first started dating in the 10th grade, he was a lot more affectionate and showed how much he loved me every single day. Well I became depressed during the 7th month of our relationship and he and my friends had told me that I changed dramatically and that I was boring and never wanted to do anything fun. Well apparently he suddenly became uninterested in me and broke up with me. I thought he loved me and I sure did love him like crazy.

    So he broke my heart, I cried every day, even at school I couldn't hold my tears back. Well about 2 days after he and I broke up I heard someone in my class say that he already had a new girlfriend. I was so upset that it only made my crying worse. I was actually mad at him for moving on so fast.

    Well not very long after that, about 2 months passed and he calls me up and tells me that he misses me and that his girlfriend is getting on his nerves and that I am the one for him. So he broke up with her and came back to me. I was so happy but I noticed that he wasn't the same person I dated before, he wasn't as affectionate, he didn't kiss me several times a day like he used to, and he had a temper once in a while that I never saw before. I lived with it, I figured that he was just comfortable with me and our relationship that he didn't have to show his love for me and he seemed annoyed when I would want to cuddle or kiss him.

    We broke up again about 4 months after that for some stupid reason, I don't even remember what it was but I think it was my doing that time. Well- a couple of months later we were on our way to school in the 12th grade, I picked him up and down the street from his house he told me to stop the car. He came over to my side and told me that whether he shows it or not, he does love me, with all of his heart and begged me to give him another chance, so I told him, "one more chance, don't blow it this time." Well to both of our surprise, minutes later we were both involved in a fatal car accident. It was my fault, a three car head on collision causing the person I hit head on to die instantly at the scene, not to mention me bleeding to death, hanging on by a thread right next to the one I love. He broke his neck and barely survived as did I.

    When we both got out of the hospital about 2 months later, we continued with our life together as a couple for about 1 year until he broke up with me again because he wasn't sure of his love for me. So I moved on and found a new boyfriend, we were together for about 2 months when my ex came to me and offered me himself. I couldn't, I was already in a relationship but he couldn't handle it, he cried every night to me and begged me to help him when he told me that he wanted to marry me and now it was over. Of course I had told him when I started dating this other guy that I no longer loved him and I have moved on. When my feelings for this other guy wore off, it seems he only thought about sex, I broke up with him and went back to my ex who had promised to marry me and all that within the next 5 years. But now, 3 months later, he is telling me that he is unsure of his feelings for me and he doesn't know if he wants to get married to me.

    He doesn't seem very lovable and when he does it is when HE wants to. I am tired of his games. I gave him my heart when he wanted it the most and now he is telling me that he doesn't know if he wants to give me his. I am the only girl he has ever been with intimately so he says that he wants to experience it with other people since I have and that it isn't fair.

    I think he is being childish and he doesn't know what he wants. It seems like he only wants me when he doesn't have me.

    What should I do?

    He is taking the time to think about his feelings.

    I am stuck here. I love him so much but I can never be sure about his feelings because they are always changing.

    Could it be jealousy issues?
  • Sep 16, 2007, 09:23 PM
    AKaeTrue
    A lot of things could be going on here.
    The only true way to know what's up with your boyfriends feelings is to talk to him about them with a little heart to heart.
    You both have a long history with one another and a big traumatizing event in the middle of it.
    You've known each other for so long and went through such a horrific event together that maybe there is a bond there, but perhaps it's not an intimate one.
    You should just bring up your thoughts about the situation and see what he says about his.
  • Sep 16, 2007, 09:30 PM
    Homegirl 50
    Sounds to me like there has always been this on again off again thing going on with you two. It's a pattern that will not likely break. I'd let him go and be done with it. Too much drama.
  • Dec 5, 2009, 08:19 AM
    sexyhot
    I have a boyfriend, well I did, now we are fighting for no reason at all
    I have been so nice, and kind to him, now he his being rude but I still love and care about him crazy, he
    Is on my head most every day, and when I see him look at me I wonder what he is thinking.
    He is a great nice hot guy inside but on the out side he is a different guy what can I do, and say to have
    Him understand how I feel, I love and care, and want him in my life


    My boyfriend who is now my ex boyfriend was my great close friend growing up now he has turned in to someone who I have never seen
    My ex boyfriend is a great nice man but has a hard time sharing his deepest feeling I love and care for him like a sister what should I do and say to help him understand how I feel in my heart for him:confused:

    Well the only things I have tried doing to help him know how I feel just is not working :confused:

    But I know deep down he still Care's and likes me
    And has feeling' for me but it could be just in a different way

    I won't know till he tells me but tell then the lord is here to heal me and my ex boyfriend


    If people out in the world want to have a great loving life with and husband or a wife or a girlfriend or a boyfriend..
    They have to look deep in them self to find out how they feel for there one they love..

    And tell the truth to them and always forgive them if they do something they do wrong

    We always make bad chooses but we
    Can still stay with are love

    Its just how you take thing
    And think about them

    Last thing we should not do
    Is not hide are feeling talk about them if we hide them its going to get
    Bad

    So always talk out are feeling and help them to understand about you

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:50 AM.