Hello,

Today I found out that my 13 year old grand daughter touched another 13 year old boys penis. He is so tramatized by the ordeal and his mother is just sick. I'm am at a wits end as to how to handle the situation.

Legally what should be done about this. The boys mom wants my grand daughter to receive therapy, however I'm not sure what to do. What kind of charges can she receive? Can she go to jail for something like this?

How do sexual harassment laws work for children of this age?:(

Hello Selah:

I think we've just worked ourselves into frenzy when it comes to this stuff. In my view, a 13 year old girl touching a 13 year old boy's penis is perfectly NORMAL... Let me say that again, it's NORMAL...

Nobody needs therapy except the boy's mom, perhaps.

excon

It must be stressed to this girl that #1 she is to young to be touching anything #2 when she is old enough to touch, it must only be when someone else says it is OK. I really don't see what you are describing, as child on child sex abuse. I would really sit her down and have a talk with her. As for jail, people do far worse things than that and never receive jail time.

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Originally Posted by bushg

when she is old enough to touch, it must only be when someone else says it is ok.

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Hello again,

We don't know whether it was OK with the boy or not. All we know is the mother says the boy is traumatized. Given that this mother is hysterical, I would think he's traumatized by HER, not the girl who touched him.

Now, they're considering calling the cops, and then EVERYBODY will be TRAUMATIZED!! Plus, this kid could get stuck with the title of SEX OFFENDER……. FOREVER!! Talk about traumatizing...

My suggestion is that everybody sit down, and have a long drink of water…….

excon

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Originally Posted by excon

Hello again,

We don't know whether it was ok with the boy or not. All we know is the mother says the boy is traumatized. Given that this mother is hysterical, I would think he's traumatized by HER, not the girl who touched him.

Now, they're considering calling the cops, and then EVERYBODY will be TRAUMATIZED!!! Plus, this kid could get stuck with the title of SEX OFFENDER……. FOREVER!!!!! Talk about traumatizing.....

My suggestion is that everybody sit down, and have a long drink of water…….

excon

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Good call excon... I can't imagine many 13 year old boys would be traumatized by something like this!

Traumatized? More likely humiliated that his mother is freaking out. It's time for the good ol' birds and bees discussion along with responsibility, disease and pregnancy lectures.

Sexual harassment? No way - natural curiosity, IMO. You need a rational adult with a cool head (no pun intended) to talk to the traumatized mother.

This type of event is not criminal (at least in the state I am in) and is fairly normal exploratory behavior for kids. However, this is a situation where parenting is needed. The parents must sit down with the kids (either together or seperately) and teach and ask questions. The parents should find out why the young girl did this and again teach that it is not appropriate at this age and what is appropriate. Society as parents are becoming so scared of parenting that everything now has to be dealt with in counseling. Rules, expectations, and proper boundaries start at home!

Thanks Con I knew you would agree.

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cpalmist agrees: Traumatized because she did or because she stopped or were they surprised by a Mom or someone. Facts aren't all in but somehow it's all the girls fault - that seem right to you?

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Doesn't seem right to me. How could she touch it if it wasn't exposed? The overreaction by the adults to this situation is apt to traumatize these kids more than anything else.

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Originally Posted by Emland

Doesn't seem right to me. How could she touch it if it wasn't exposed? The overreaction by the adults to this situation is apt to traumatize these kids more than anything else.

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There you have it, the hormones driving this young mans mind. And I guess that he was innocent? Yeah right. There was something more to this than was told here. Sounds like unattended CHILDREN got caught with their pants down so to speak.

If this were 10 year olds or younger I would totally agree with everyone else. But at 13 this goes beyond mere sexual curiousity. There are a lot of questions here. Where did this happen? What were the circumstances? How did his pants get down? How did his mother find out?

I really can't imagine a 13 yr old boy being traumatized by a 13 yr old girl touching him. At 13 nowadays, 13 yr olds are much more aware sexually. So there really has to be more to this story.

If the boy's mother hasn't had the birds and bees talk by now, she has been totally negligent.

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Originally Posted by excon

Hello Selah:

I think we've just worked ourselves into frenzy when it comes to this stuff. In my view, a 13 year old girl touching a 13 year old boy’s penis is perfectly NORMAL............ Let me say that again, it's NORMAL......

Nobody needs therapy except the boy’s mom, perhaps.

excon

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I don't see how that's normal.If I got caught doing that I would be in so much trouble the first person in my family to know about what I did would be my mom then my grandma and so on.And I haven't got the talk yet I just learn the stuff by what people say and I can always read about that stuff.

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Originally Posted by bre1028

If i got caught doing that i would be in so much trouble

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Hello bre:

Yes, you'd be in trouble. That's NOT because what you did isn't normal. It's the response to normal activity that's NOT normal. I understand it's because of sexually repressed religious fanatics, but that doesn't make anywhere near normal..

excon