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-   -   A sex addict/user or a typical lad? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=128848)

  • Sep 12, 2007, 02:41 PM
    confusedhead
    A sex addict/user or a typical lad?
    I understand lads like sex, they like photo's on their phone and they like to talk graphically with their lad mates about sex!

    BUT... how can you tell if someone is taking it too far?

    I'm an 18 yr old virgin. I've met a guy I like who is 21 and experienced in r'ships. Because I get het up over my body I have never allowed myself into a relationship before, but I felt things could work with this guy if we took things slowly.

    From a few dates I've discovered he obviously has had sex with previous girlfriends very soon into the relationship. Because I feel differently he said he would respect that, which I appreciate. But he told me he has a high sex drive, and finds it weird that there will be no sex for a while. I find this hard to deal with as if he is in a subconscious manner trying to pressurise me.

    I really like what I've seen so far, but I'm confused by all this, but when I try and investigate more it doesn't go down to well!

    Please help me! Does he sound like a sex addict, as if he just wants me for sex? Does it sound like its already gone bad?

    I'm clueless and desperate for help or any advice at all, I have no one to talk to at all!
  • Sep 12, 2007, 02:52 PM
    ScottGem
    If his drive is that "hugh", then you don't want him anyway. If he can't respect your wishes about the physical part of your relationship, then you don't want him anyway.

    Maybe he has just had partners that don't have as many scruples as you do about jumping into bed. But if he won't respect it forget him.
  • Sep 12, 2007, 02:57 PM
    confusedhead
    no no he's not said he won't, he actually said he does respect my views lots. I'm not saying I don't want sex. My issue is that I have stretch marks and I'm scared that if a guy likes the physical side on a relationship he will be repulsed by my marks and then I may end up humilated. I do want sex, but obviously I have my views and I wouldn't jump into bed straight away. But I just can't sum him up!
  • Sep 12, 2007, 04:31 PM
    Emland
    The only guidance I can offer is that my husband was Lead Petty Officer for a bunch of unmarried sailors in his previous career. I once remarked about how much one particular fellow talked about sex all the time. (and was uncouth enough to do it in mixed company.) His answer to me was "those that talk about it, aren't getting it."

    He made more talk that you think. Don't make him pressure you though. You should share your virtue with someone that is very special to you.

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