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-   -   Love-- Sick of it already and haven't even started (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=12879)

  • Sep 19, 2005, 02:48 PM
    Chip_nutter
    Love-- Sick of it already and haven't even started
    Hey,
    I'm 17 and have never had a girlfreind and never kissed a girl either. I have lots of problems with this issue as I have had bad experiences with girls since, well ever! Firstly there was a girl wo I really liked but took many months to get up the courage to ask her to the prom. She unbealivably says yes and I was estatic but on the fateful stands me up and I only manage a few garbled convos with her throughout the night this severely pissed me off and stump me as far as confidence goes. This was a year ago but since then I have had other problems this time after my party a girl and some friends stayed over she was really nice and we did get quite close and the closest encounter I have had resembling attraction towards me. However a couple of days later I hear her spreading lies and insults to all her friends who continue to batter me with emails. Anyway these kind of things have put me off but I also seem totally it up if I do have chance wiv a girl, its happened recently with some girls but I'm convinced I'm grotesque and girls never see me the way I want to be seen, as guy not a friend if you know what I mean. Im told by people I'm not ugly and a really nice bloke but the fact is don't believe it. This really does not require an answer, I needed to get it out, you deserve a medal if you read it all but overall every time I make that leap of faith I fall
    Why should I bother again?
  • Sep 19, 2005, 06:52 PM
    letmeno
    Don't rush it
    I know that this does not mean jack to you right now but hear me out. You are 17. Trust me, you will have plenty of time for the whole dating thing. Please do me a favor, finish high school, go to college, get a high paying job with six figures and watch them come running. Seriously, you are a young man, enjoy life, enjoy your youth, take it from me, girls will come, and girls will go, you have plenty of time to date. There are so many of us in this chat room who would give there right arm to have that age back. You will find a girlfriend one day and take my word for it, she will drive you crazy. Ask anyone here, dating is overrated anyway. Hope this helps!
  • Sep 19, 2005, 11:22 PM
    rkim291968
    First of all, I deserve a medal.

    Secondly, I will give my right arm to be 17 again.

    Finally, I concur with letmeno's reply.
  • Sep 20, 2005, 04:55 AM
    Chery
    There will be more of this in your future as well as all others your age. It's called growing up, and just plain facts of life. Some have it easy, some don't. All 'blokes' as you call them and all 'gals' go through the same thing, and their peers don't do much to help, even though they go through the same emotional rollercoaster as you do. And when they make fun, it's just because they try and distract or hide their own problems and pull themselves up at other's expense, believe me. Learn with each experience, and don't be bitter or give up, it's part of life's experiences we all go through - no matter what age. Just as we grow older the 'games' change until eventually you don't have to play the games anymore, and that's when the real relationships that count come into play. You could also turn the table and make just friends, act absolutely uninterested about getting closer, and see what happens. When I was your age, girls went after the guys who played 'hard to get' just as the guys went after the girls who did the same - at any rate it's all part of the Game. Finish schools, get a good life for yourself - then think about sharing it with another, but until then it's OK to play, safely! I don't wish I were your age again, and I feel sorry for all that have to go through this, but it does get a little easier. Good Luck. :)
  • Sep 20, 2005, 05:59 AM
    Chip_nutter
    Tanks for the help, I guess I am being a bit dramatic
    Thanks again all of u
  • Sep 20, 2005, 06:05 AM
    Chery
    Your are not being dramatic, you're completely normal and at least have the guts to say so and ask for advice. Some are not that lucky and go through this on their own, which is harder. At any rate, you sound sensible, and I'm sure you will survive. Don't hesitate to contact any time, that's what this forum is for. Too bad there was no forum when I was growing up - my mom did nothing to help me grow, I did it the hard way - glad to help anyone avoid the mistakes I made...
  • Sep 20, 2005, 07:15 AM
    baidarka
    Letmeno said it best. Get a job making six figures. :D

    Love is a funny thing. When you love her, she doesn't love you. When she loves you, you don't love her. As Woody Allen said in the movie, "Annie Hall," "I wouldn't want to be in a club that would have me as a member."

    The key is to find a girl who has a similarly high interest level in you as you do in her, preferably, she'll have a slightly higher interest level. Women want to look up to men, so don't be too affectionate and caring. She'll lose interest. Be a gentleman and all that, but stay cool. Finally, don't take it too seriously. Relax and have fun.

    By the way, rkim, I'd give my left leg to be 17 again. It's gimpy anyway, so I have no use for it. ;)
  • Sep 21, 2005, 12:01 AM
    rkim291968
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by baidarka
    By the way, rkim, I'd give my left leg to be 17 again. It's gimpy anyway, so I have no use for it. ;)

    :eek: Ok, I've changed my mind. I will give up my left arm as I am right handed. ;)

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