I am pregnant with my first child . I am due any time soon as I am 40weeks already. I am very scared of the whole baby birth process. I guess I don't have any choice as it could happen any time now. And I know its going to be hard as my family are not around its just my husband and I and my husband works all the time he's always not home. So I have very little support

Please any advice regarding motherhood and anything that will be helpful. Any ideas of baby clubs I could join online and any baby tips just any advice that would be helpful for me and my child. Thanks

Once you go into labor, most of it comes naturally. The best advice I can give you is to do all the research and preparation you possibly can with the time that is left. The more informed you are, the less frightening things will be. The nurses and doctors and usually very helpful and understanding in the hospitals, and if you ask, they will do their best to help keep you informed on every step you are going through.what are some of the things you are afraid of. Perhaps we can help ease your mind, with any expereince we may have had in the situations. My hubby and I were basically in the same position that you and your hubby are in now. Not much support, and all on our own as far as the whole parenting thing goes. Just do your best, use this as an opportunity to draw your own little family closer. There are usually several mommy/baby groups around, your doctors could probably suggest some to you. Googleing it online is a good idea too. And you can always come to this site for any help that you may need, we love to help.

Thank you buggage for your advice. The things that I'm scared about are whether I should use pain relief as most of them have side effects so I'm not sure if this is the right thing or I should just go natural.

I am worried if I am going to be a good mother to my first child. Is my baby going to come out fine, am I going to to know how to look after her as I have never held a baby before.

I guess as you said they all come naturally I will try and research info on Google as you suggested.

Thanks

Hi. Just as buggage states, we will be happy to help you in any way we can. I hope that your labor goes well and is a short one. Do you have a name for the baby yet?

What is always important is that you have a healthy mental attitude about what is going to take place, so go to the maternity clinic/ward of your choice and get to know the people there. Look around and ask what types of birth techniques are available so that you can make a choice.

When I had my daughter in '76 it was in a white painted 6-bed (like metal cots) long, sterile looking room that did not make me feel comfortable at all.

When my daughter went to have her baby last year, we entered a ward with cute motifs on the walls, windows, and the beds were cushioned and very colorful. She tried out the water-birth method (candles, light music, warm water, etc) and the stooped method, and another one, but had to have a C-section in the end due to the position of Alexander's head and the stress it could cause him if we waited longer. All in all, though, he's such a beautiful little mommy's boy and he walks so fast now that it's hard to keep up sometimes.

Check this site out - the page is on "Birth Stories" right now, but you can follow on further development and common questions throughout. I'm sure you'll find other nice sites, so just pick one you like and it too will help you.

BabyCenter -- Birth Stories

Also, as buggage said, once the little one is here, you'll know by instinct how to hold him/her. You'll both bond so much that it will surprise you.

Good luck dear, and happy parenting!

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Every woman and pregnancy is different. As such, until you are experiencing the labor process, you won't be able to say for sure one way or the other, on if you want to use pain meds or not. You are right, they all carry some small amount of side effect. However, so does not using them. If the labor is long(like most first deliveries are) and you are in a lot of pain, you can get tired out fast, and also tense up, which will slow things down further. Or you could do just fine without the meds. Basically the Epi, etc, are made for the purpose of helping you to relax, helping your muscles to relax. It's a natural reflex when you are in pain, that you tense up, and your adrenaline starts pumping. In this case, the fight or flight scenario is not ideal, simply because it causes the muscles to tense, and fights their natural methods of pushing. It all just depends on you, your body, and your baby, and how you all react to the birthing process. This is why they offer lamaze classes, to help you learn how to relax during the contractions. I studied up on every birthing method I could find. I found that the hypnobirthing methods helped me out best, as I really didn't feel comfortable with the doggy panting breathing technics associated with lamaze, during my first labor;0). So this second time around, I used the methods of hynobirthing. The best advice I can give you in the labor department is to just relax as much as you can. When the contractions come, don't fight them, work with them. They have so many wonderful opportunities in hospitals now. Water birthing, being able to sit in the showers to help through your contractions, you sit in comfortably decorated rooms, you can dim the lights, some allow aroma therapy ( though most still don't allow candles in a hospital room. If you go to a midwivery/birthing center they are more relaxed on such issues)music, TV, the list goes on and on. They will suggest the optimal laboring positions, but for the most part, they will allow you to labor in whatever position you wish to try, at least in the beginning.(again, this depends on where you are laboring) they won't force you to use pain medication, and they won't think badly of you if you chose to use it. As far as your abilities as a mother, EVERY parent has these doubts. Even parents with grown children still doubt in their abilities at times. Its something that only experiencing it and getting in a lifetime of practice, will solve. ;0) I am sure that you will be a wonderful mother. There will be lots of frustrating moments, but the beautiful happy moments will far outweigh any of the negative. Good luck to you sweety. All will go well.