Ask Me Help Desk - Teen Sex?

Teen Sex?

I've been reading posts and answers from this website and realized many teens are having sex! I go to a public school in Canada and I'm in my second-last year of high school and the thought of sex at this age really scares me. It's the same with my friends, we would get creeped out if we found out a classmate had sex. I've never seen or heard of any pregnant people in my school. I have a boyfriend of 3 years (who's also my best friend) and I would never think of doing anything like that with him that early. Sex before becoming an adult seems really unnecessary and just not right to me. So my question is, why are so many teens doing this?

HI. I'm 16... im not a virgin... I can't awnser your question for everyone else but as for me... im not really sure... I wasn't pressured or anything... alot of it was curiosity... and a lot of it maybe has to do the environment... in my school its not a big deal to have sex... and honestly I'm not sure why... I still thing it's a huge deal... but I was in love and curious... we had done just about everything else... it made sense to just have actually sex...

The golden question of your teenage years...
It really depends on where you are. In some places its normal to start having sex at 15... and everyone realizes that... and in a lot of places people are different and believe that you should wait until you are more responsible... I believe that you should wait, because sex can mean a child, even if you use birth control... and I don't think I would try an abortion. Really your decision.

I'm 16 and have had sex quite a few times... I think teens do it as it is all about the expierience and the pressure of today's society... also we like to make sure that we are more expierienced for when we ourselves are adults

I think that a lot of teens don't see it as a big deal, I know I didn't when I was younger. I wish I had waited until I was older because I was not ready for the emotional toil that came with having a sexual relationship. I was in no way mature enough at 16 to handle all of the consequences of sex.

I think that girls like you bubbletea are out there. My 17 year old cousin is saving herself as are most of her friends. They think just like you that they are not old enough to handle that progression in their relationship. It's hard to fight against peer pressure and pave your own path it takes a lot of strength and conviction. Good for you for the choices you have made.

Hello.

I have to say your school is one of a kind. I know many of the teen sex questions are from Canada as well as all over the world. I have been answering questions on sites like Ask Me for many years and it seems the answer to your question never changes. It's one of two main reasons, First and foremost is the Boy said he Loved Me and if I Loved him I would show him how much. The next is I was ready and everyone I know was doing it.

As you can see your much smarter then the main stream of Girls your age and for that I want to give you credit. IM not sure why you and your friends are so mature in your thinking but keep it up.

Dennis777

Thanks for your posts guys.

Well basically, my friends and I just think that it's not worth the risk (even if it's a tiny chance) of getting pregnant or getting an STD just for some pleasure. Even if it's for love, we believe there are many other more meaningful ways to show it (Yeah I know most teens are infatuated, but I think love can happen to some lucky ones who take the time to know the other person and lust can always blossom over time). I think I would know a guy cares about me if he's there to lend a hand when I'm in need of help, is my shoulder to cry on, knows how to cheer me up when I'm down, is a good listener when I need someone to talk to, respects my decisions, and is there to give me a big hug to get me through the day. Not if he asks for sex.

Like we're only 16/17, and unless we get hit by a car or murdered, we have a lot of life ahead of us to experience what we want, so I don't get what the rush is. Although we may be physically ready for sex, we are definitely not mentally ready, no matter how mature we are. Once we're older and we find a stable guy who loves us for who we are, then we can have sex without having to regret anything. It is much more difficult to cope with pregnancy while being a teen compared to an adult. I'm not saying marriage is a must, but we should at least wait until the time comes when we're mature enough to handle it, and that time is definitely not in the teen years.

For now, my main focus is to study hard and get into a good university (I'm trying for U of T or McMaster). There would be lots of time for men in my later years. The thing with my boyfriend, well I think that spending some quality time with a special guy doing appropriate things (movies, walks, shopping) is still acceptable because everyone should have fun once in a while, since school brings a lot of pressure.

I can never go back in time, and once I'm an adult, it'll be the end of my childhood for good, so I want to take advantage of the fact that I can do fun kiddy things without having the stress adults do from having to work, pay taxes, take care of the family, pay the rent, etc. I don't want to grow up having regrets and knowing I did not live my childhood up to the fullest.

Well if you don't agree with me, don't jump on me! I'm still young, growing and learning, but that's just my opinion at this point of my life.

You ask why, look around, television, magazines, bill boards, everywhere you look, there is sex, sex , and oh yeah more sex. That is why we live in the sexual explosion we live in today.

Hello.

Im sure your post has opened so many teens eyes and the rest of us that only act like teens at times hehehe. It is such a pleasure to see words of wisdom way beyond your years posted this way. I hope every teen that now has the courage to say NO and every adult that thought sex is a way of life now for teens will let you know how much your post has helped them.

Dennis777

Yes, I am glad I am not alone.:)
I am not a teen, I am a young professional with Fortune 500.
Although I am good looking, outgoing,I never had a boyfriend or sex, I don't think people should date just for fun and because everyone else is dating/ having sex, you can still follow what you think is right for you.
Be yourself, and the fact has proved that a moral person with a clear head on her shoulder goes much further than those who made irrational mistakes.
Keep it up, girl!:)

I'm 16. Some kids do it because they think they are being cool. And several other reasons. Me and my boyfriend have done it way too many times. Just a way of showing love I guess. If I didn't plan on being with him a while I wouldn't do that with him. I don't want to be one of those people that's done stuff with a lot of people in there life. I only want it to be him. And after him I never will do anything with anyone. Because I don't want it to be a mistake. I feel bad for him because I did something before I knew him that I really regret. And I don't want to find someone after him and them be hurt because of everything I did with him. So after him that's it.

Thanks to everyone for commenting! This is the first time someone called me mature! (Maybe it's because I look like a 13-year-old lol). Yeah, and I do hope all teens have the courage to say "NO" because they shouldn't do anything that would make them feel uncomfortable. I also hope my previous post did help teens! =)

No what it is teen sex is cool... ull never no if you don't try it

Not to let you down or anything. Actually maybe you can help me. I'm really sad because I miss doing that with my boyfriend. That's why we aren't aloud to talk. I went all summer without seeing him. And now I only see him at school.

Quote:

Originally Posted by gerardymolawd

no wat it is teen sex is cool...ull never no if ya dnt try it

Please edit your post so that it is in proper English. Chat speak is not allowed on this forum

And BubbleTea your parents should be very proud of what a responsible, mature young lady you are.

Sorry glenda what I said was

Teen sex is cool and if you haven't tried it you haven't lived

Quote:

Originally Posted by gerardymolawd

no wat it is teen sex is cool...ull never no if ya dnt try it

I'm certainly not encouraging it, but if that's what you think I obviously can't do anything about it. I do not want to start arguments here.

Its not cool to do it with a bunch of people and regret it all one day. If you stay with one person and plan on being together a long time, what's the big deal?

Quote:

Originally Posted by kt1205

not to let you down or anything. actually maybe you can help me. i'm really sad because i miss doing that with my bf. thats why we arent aloud to talk. i went all summer without seeing him. and now i only see him at school.

Why aren't you allowed to talk?